Professor anil aggarwal

Overcoming Shyness

2009-07-14T20:45:00.001-07:00

Overcoming Shyness

All my life I’ve been an inwardly directed person. While some people like to think out loud, I prefer to process the world internally, answer my own questions, and come to a conclusion before speaking up.
This personality trait has benefits and drawbacks. On the positive side, it’s a source of strength as a writer and analytical thinker. Without it I wouldn’t have taken an interest in books/writing and this site wouldn’t exist. On the downside, my tendency to keep everything inside is responsible for one of my major weaknesses — shyness.
Understanding Shyness
Shyness is rooted in fear — an irrational fear of speaking up and being humiliated or ignored. Why are some people so afraid of speaking out? In my mind the main causes are oversensitivity and insecurity. When you associate speaking out with pain and embarrassment, you’ll do almost anything to avoid it.

Unfortunately, shyness is an enormous detriment to success. For people who share this problem, it’s important to understand the causes and work towards overcoming it.
It’s Not You It’s Them
For naturally quiet people, the fear of speaking can arise from a few bad experiences, especially at an early age. When an adult reacts angrily or dismissively to an attempt at self expression, it’s natural to take it personally and shy away from future expression. Even if this only happens once or twice, people tend to exaggerate these incidents until they become mental monsters. Growing up, it took me a long time to realize how self centered people are. The way someone reacts to something you say usually has nothing to do with you–it’s more likely a reflection of the mood they’re in or a recent event in their life.
A key to overcoming shyness is recognizing these perceived slights for what they are–meaningless. When someone reacts to you negatively, don’t take it personally. Imagine the other person’s perspective. Is there something that may have put them in a bad mood? Are they trying to cover up their own inadequacy? Considering the perspective of the other person makes it easier to put their reaction in the proper context.
It’s also essential to let go of bad experiences. When you dwell on a bad experience, it grows into something much more frightening than reality. Don’t do this to yourself! The more you think about a bad experience the more power you give it. Don’t blame yourself. Think about something constructive. The more you can fill your mind with positive memories of speaking up the easier it gets.
Other People Aren’t So Different
Another important step in overcoming shyness is realizing that other people are basically the same as you. Everyone is insecure and afraid of embarrassment. Other people usually aren’t as smart as you think. If you have a question, chances are someone else is wondering about the same thing.
Don’t let one or two bad experiences dictate your entire opinion of humanity. By and large, people are friendly and interested in connecting with others. They’ll respond favorably to your attempts at communicating. In most cases, people will be thrilled that you took the initiative to break the ice.
Realizing Self Worth
The second cause of shyness is insecurity. If you don’t think you have anything valuable to contribute, what’s the point of risking embarrassment?
To get over this you need to recognize the merit of your own thoughts and the value they present to others. It’s ironic that the people most inclined towards shyness are often the most thoughtful. To reach your potential, you need to share yourself with the world. Your brilliant insights don’t hold any value until they’ve enlightened someone else.
The best way to get accustomed to sharing is practice. Force yourself to speak up, especially when you don’t want to. Sit in the front of the room and make yourself visible. Understand that sharing your insights with people is doing them a favor. Once you get used to opening up, you’ll notice how positively people react. This will build your self confidence and faith in the goodwill of others.
The Duty to Contribute
Overcoming shyness isn’t just something you should do for yourself, it’s also part of being a contributing member of society. When you have a thought or idea that deserves to be heard, you’re not only hurting yourself by keeping quiet, you’re hurting the people around you.
A basketball coach once explained to me how passing can selfish. If a player has an open shot that she can make, and she decides to pass instead, that player is being selfish and hurting the team. When you pass up the chance to excel because of shyness or the fear of failure, you’re hurting the group to shelter yourself.
Other people need you. They need your intelligence and insight. They need your help to work through problems. By hiding behind shyness, you limit the help you can give to your friends, family members, and colleagues.
A college professor of mine used to make a big deal about overcoming shyness. He called it a, “silly, foolish habit,” and said, “the sooner you can break it the better.” Shyness doesn’t benefit anyone. Saving yourself a little embarrassment doesn’t amount to much in the long run. By overcoming shyness, you give yourself the chance to be recognized and promoted. You create opportunities and open yourself up to forming meaningful relationships.
Don’t keep your talent inside, share at every opportunity so it can grow and flourish.

Just chill............agarbandhu

5 Simple Ways to Increase Your Intelligence

2009-07-14T20:41:00.000-07:00

5 Simple Ways to Increase Your Intelligence

Your brain needs exercise just like a muscle. If you use it often and in the right ways, you will become a more skilled thinker and increase your ability to focus. But if you never use your brain, or abuse it with harmful chemicals, your ability to think and learn will deteriorate.

Here are 5 simple ways anyone can squeeze a bit more productivity out of the old gray matter.

1. Minimize Television Watching - This is a hard sell. People love vegetating in front of the television, myself included more often than I’d like. The problem is watching television doesn’t use your mental capacity OR allow it to recharge. It’s like having the energy sapped out of a muscle without the health benefits of exercise.

Don’t you feel drained after a couple hours of TV? Your eyes are sore and tired from being focused on the light box for so long. You don’t even have the energy to read a book.
When you feel like relaxing, try reading a book instead. If you’re too tired, listen to some music. When you’re with your friends or family, leave the tube off and have a conversation. All of these things use your mind more than television and allow you to relax.

2. Exercise - I used to think that I’d learn more by not exercising and using the time to read a book instead. But I realized that time spent exercising always leads to greater learning because it improves productivity during the time afterwards. Using your body clears your head and creates a wave of energy. Afterwards, you feel invigorated and can concentrate more easily.

3. Read Challenging Books - Many people like to read popular suspense fiction, but generally these books aren’t mentally stimulating. If you want to improve your thinking and writing ability you should read books that make you focus. Reading a classic novel can change your view of the world and will make you think in more precise, elegant English. Don’t be afraid to look up a word if you don’t know it, and don’t be afraid of dense passages. Take your time, re-read when necessary, and you’ll soon grow accustomed to the author’s style.
Once you get used to reading challenging books, I think you’ll find that you aren’t tempted to go back to page-turners. The challenge of learning new ideas is far more exciting than any tacky suspense-thriller.

4. Early to Bed, Early to Rise - Nothing makes it harder to concentrate than sleep deprivation. You’ll be most rejuvenated if you go to bed early and don’t sleep more than 8 hours. If you stay up late and compensate by sleeping late, you’ll wake up lethargic and have trouble focusing. In my experience the early morning hours are the most tranquil and productive. Waking up early gives you more productive hours and maximizes your mental acuity all day.
If you have the opportunity, take 10-20 minute naps when you are hit with a wave of drowsiness. Anything longer will make you lethargic, but a short nap will refresh you.

5. Take Time to Reflect - Often our lives get so hectic that we become overwhelmed without even realizing it. It becomes difficult to concentrate because nagging thoughts keep interrupting. Spending some time alone in reflection gives you a chance organize your thoughts and prioritize your responsibilities. Afterwards, you’ll have a better understanding of what’s important and what isn’t. The unimportant stuff won’t bother you anymore and your mind will feel less encumbered.
I’m not saying you need to sit on the floor cross-legged and chant ‘ommm’. Anything that allows a bit of prolonged solitude will do. One of my personal favorites is taking a solitary walk. Someone famous said, “All the best ideas occur while walking.” I think he was on to something. Experiment to find the activity that works best for you.

Conclusion - I hope you aren’t disappointed that none of the techniques I’ve proposed are revolutionary. But simple, unexciting answers are often the most valid. The challenge is having the will to adhere to them. If you succeed in following these 5 tips, you’ll be rewarded with increased mental acuity and retention of knowledge.

Just chill............agarbandhu

10 Ways to Instantly Build Self Confidence

2009-07-14T20:38:00.000-07:00

10 Ways to Instantly Build Self Confidence

Self confidence is the difference between feeling unstoppable and feeling scared out of your wits. Your perception of yourself has an enormous impact on how others perceive you. Perception is reality — the more self confidence you have, the more likely it is you’ll succeed.
Although many of the factors affecting self confidence are beyond your control, there are a number of things you can consciously do to build self confidence. By using these 10 strategies you can get the mental edge you need to reach your potential.
Build Self Confidence
1. Dress Sharp
Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don’t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and shaving frequently, wearing clean clothes, and being cognizant of the latest styles.
This doesn’t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes. Buying less also helps reduce the clutter in your closet.
2. Walk Faster
One of the easiest ways to tell how a person feels about herself is to examine her walk. Is it slow? tired? painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.

3. Good Posture
Similarly, the way a person carries herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They aren’t enthusiastic about what they’re doing and they don’t consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You’ll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.
4. Personal Commercial
One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech. Unfortunately, opportunities to listen to a great speaker are few and far between. You can fill this need by creating a personal commercial. Write a 30-60 second speech that highlights your strengths and goals. Then recite it in front of the mirror aloud (or inside your head if you prefer) whenever you need a confidence boost.
5. Gratitude
When you focus too much on what you want, the mind creates reasons why you can’t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum. You’ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success.
6. Compliment other people
When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you’ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.
7. Sit in the front rowIn schools, offices, and public assemblies around the world, people constantly strive to sit at the back of the room. Most people prefer the back because they’re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.
8. Speak up
During group discussions many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. This fear isn’t really justified. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.
9. Work out
Along the same lines as personal appearance, physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physcial appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive. Having the discipline to work out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.
10. Focus on contribution
Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus too much on ourselves and not enough on the needs of other people. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you’re making to the rest of the world, you won’t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase self confidence and allow you to contribute with maximum efficiency. The more you contribute to the world the more you’ll be rewarded with personal success and recognition.

Just chill..........agarbandhu

An effective guide for Group Discussions...

2009-07-14T20:29:00.000-07:00

An effective guide for Group Discussions...

Many companies conduct group discussion after the written test so as to check on your interactive skills and how good you are at communicating with other people. The GD is to check how you behave, participate and contribute in a group, how much importance do you give to the group objective as well as your own, how well do you listen to viewpoints of others and how open-minded are you in accepting views contrary to your own. The aspects which make up a GD are verbal communication, non-verbal behavior, and conformation to norms, decision-making ability and cooperation.

You should try to be as true as possible to these aspects.

1. In a group discussion what should my objectives be and how should I achieve them?

2. Is it wise to take a strong stand either in favor or against the topic right at the start of a Group Discussion?

3. Is it a good strategy to try and be the first speaker on the topic in a GD?

4. In an interview how does one handle the question "Tell us about yourself?".

5. Is it better to have a longer selection interview or a shorter one?

6. In the MBA entrance interview how do I justify my decision to pursue the MBA Programe?In a group discussion what should my objectives be and how should I achieve them?

In order to succeed at any unstructured group discussion, you must define what your objective in the group is. A good definition of your objective is - to be seen to have contributed meaningfully in an attempt to achieve the right consensus. The key words in this definition are 'seen', 'meaningfully', and 'attempt'.

Let us understand what each of these imply in terms of action points:

The first implication is that merely making a meaningful contribution in an attempt to achieve consensus is not enough. You have to be seen by the evaluator to have made a meaningful contribution in n attempt to build the right consensus.In other words you must ensure that you are heard by the group. If the group hears you so will the evaluator. You must get at least some airtime. If you are not a very assertive person you will have to simply learn to be assertive for those 15 minutes. If you get cowed down easily in an aggressive group, you can say goodbye to the business school admission. Many GD participants often complain that they did not get a chance to speak. The fact of the matter is that in no GD do you get a chance to speak. You have to make your chances.

The second important implication is that making just any sort of contribution is not enough. Your contribution has to be meaningful. A meaningful contribution suggests that you have a good knowledge base, are able to structure arguments logically and are a good communicator. These are qualities that are desired by all evaluators.Many GD participants feel that the way to succeed in a GD is by speaking frequently, for a long time and loudly. This is not true. The quality of what you say is more important than the quantity. Don't be demoralized if you feel you have not spoken enough. If you have spoken sense and have been heard, even if only for a short time, it is usually good enough. You must have substance in your arguments.

Therefore, think things through carefully. Always enter the room with a piece of paper and a pen. In the first two minutes jot down as many ideas as you can. It pays to think laterally. Everybody else will state the obvious.

Can you state something different?

Can you take the group ahead if it is stuck at one point?

Can you take it in a fresh and more relevant direction? You may like to dissect the topic and go into the underlying causes or into the results.

One way of deciding what sort of contribution is meaningful at what point of time is to follow two simple rules.

First, in times of chaos a person who restores order to the group is appreciated. Your level of participation in a fish market kind of scenario can be low, but your degree of influence must never be low. In other words you must make positive contributions every time you speak and not speak for the sake of speaking.

The second rule is applicable when the group is floundering. In this situation a person who provides a fresh direction to the group is given credit.

The third implication is that you must be clearly seen to be attempting to build a consensus. Nobody expects a group of ten people, all with different points of view on a controversial subject to actually achieve a consensus. But did you make the attempt to build a consensus?

The reason why an attempt to build a consensus is important is because in most work situations you will have to work with people in a team, accept joint responsibilities and take decisions as a group. You must demonstrate the fact that you are capable and inclined to work as part of a team.

What are the ways that you can try to build consensus?

First, you must not just talk, you should also listen. You must realize that other people also may have valid points to make.

You should not only try to persuade other people to your point of view, but also come across as a person who has an open mind and appreciates the valid points of others.

You must try and resolve contradictions and arguments of others in the group.

You must synthesize arguments and try and achieve a unified position in the group.

Try to think of the various arguments of yours and others' as parts of a jigsaw puzzle or as building blocks of a larger argument for or against the topic.

Try and lay down the boundaries or the area of the discussion at the beginning. Discuss what the group should discuss before actually beginning your discussion. This will at least ensure that everyone is talking about the same thing.

Try and summarize the discussion at the end. In the summary do not merely restate your point of view; also accommodate dissenting viewpoints. If the group did not reach a consensus, say so in your summary.

You must carry people with you. So do not get emotional, shout, invade other people's private space.Do not bang your fist on the table except in extreme circumstances. If you have spoken and you notice that someone else has tried to enter the discussion on a number of occasions and has not had the chance to do so maybe you could give him a chance the next time he tries. But do not offer a chance to anyone who is not trying to speak. He may not have anything to say at that point and you will just end up looking foolish. The surest way of antagonizing others in the GD as well as the examiner is to appoint yourself as a de facto chairperson of the group.

Do not try to impose a system whereby everyone gets a chance to speak in turn.

A GD is meant to be a free flowing discussion.Let it proceed naturally.

Do not ever try to take a vote on the topic. A vote is no substitute for discussion.

Do not address only one or two persons when speaking. Maintain eye contact with as many members of the group as possible. This will involve others in what you are saying and increase your chances of carrying them with you.

Do this even if you are answering a specific point raised by one person. One last point. You must not agree with another participant in the group merely for the sake of achieving consensus. If you disagree, say so. You are not there to attempt to build just any consensus.

You have to attempt to build the right consensus. Is it wise to take a strong stand either in favour or against the topic right at the start of a Group Discussion?

In theory yes. If you believe something why shouldn't you say so? If we are convinced about something our natural response is to say so emphatically. However in practice what is likely to happen if you take a very strong and dogged stance right at the beginning of the interview is that you will antagonize the people in the group who disagree with you and will be unable to carry them with you and convince them of the validity of your argument.

We therefore recommend that after you hear the topic you think about it for a minute with an open mind and note down the major issues that come to your mind.

Don't jump to any conclusions. Instead arrive at a stand in your own mind after examining all the issues in a balanced manner. Only then begin to speak. And when you do so outline the major issues first and only then state your stand. In other words give the justification first and the stand later. If you were to state your stand first chances are that the others in the group who disagree with your stand will interrupt to contradict you before you can elaborate on the reasons why you have taken that stance. In this situation the evaluator will only get an impression of what you think and not how you think. Remember you are being evaluated on how you think and not what you think.Is it a good strategy to try and be the first speaker on the topic in a GD?

In most GD's the opening speaker is the person who is likely to get the maximum uninterrupted airtime.

The reason is simple - at the start most other participants in the GD are still trying to understand the basic issues in the topic, or are too nervous to speak and are waiting for someone else to start. Therefore the evaluators get the best chance to observe the opening speaker.

Now this is a double edged sword. If the opening speaker talks sense naturally he will get credit because he opened and took the group in the right direction. If on the other hand the first speaker doesn't have too much sense to say, he will attract the undivided attention of the evaluators to his shortcomings.

He will be marked as a person who speaks without thinking merely for the sake of speaking. As someone who leads the group in the wrong direction and does not make a positive contribution to the group.So remember speaking first is a high risk high return strategy. It can make or mar your GD performance depending how you handle it. Speak first only if you have something sensible to say. Otherwise keep shut and let someone else start.

Just chill..............agarbandhu

Why a Success Coach?

2009-06-28T20:16:00.000-07:00

Why a Success Coach?

A coach is someone who helps clients discover his dreams and goals, his values, his priorities and his boundaries. A coach rarely offers advice on what to do; her role is to lead the client to identify the problem, the options and to choose a solution. A coach asks questions ' especially the tough ones. What are you afraid of? Who is waiting for you? What is it that you don't want to tell me?

A coach is on the journey with the client sharing victories, experiencing challenges, resourcing solutions together.As the teacher, or the coach, you also have to be a student. You are on a continuous learning path. In fact, it is in the process of coaching that you learn the most.

People who want to be schoolteachers need to learn how to teach. If you're going to be a success coach, doing your best won't be enough. You need to learn how to coach. You need some skills.If you start to coach without creating a foundation, you're still likely to have success in the beginning. That success comes from your excitement, your energy, and your ability to transfer that excitement to others. Their lives will improve simply because they're paying attention. Yet what happens when six months or a year passes by and all of a sudden the results drop off, and you don't know why. It will be because you don't have a system.

You won't be an expert or an authority in every area you discuss. As a success coach, what you will do is help others find their own answers, silently companioning them. It's not my job to tell my client what to do with his life, but it is my job to help him find out for himself what to do to take his life to the next level.Do you want to be a good student? Then be a good coach.Whether you think you want to be a coach or not, you should be. Enter into the business of coaching ' it will benefit your life; it will be the catalyst for you to step into greatness. When you learn to coach others, you become the best student of all.

As you coach from within yourself, outside of yourself, you often come up with solutions for your own issues while helping others discover theirs.

As you go become a coach, you'll learn to be flexible, and you'll coach in areas that you may know nothing about. And that's perfect because you don't need to know content, you just need to know people.

You're an expert on people, because you are one! You are on the outside looking in. You have a perspective that your client doesn't have.A coach is the bridge between information and action. There is a difference between knowing and doing.

Some people have the solutions to their problems, but lack the impetus to get going. Some have the solutions and aren't aware.

And some need guidance in discovering the answers they seek. But answers alone are not enough. Solutions without action result in the same outcome as not having the solution at all.

You, as the coach, believe more in your client than she/he believes in herself.

You see her as perfect.

You see the obstacles behind which lie her successes and you lead her around, over and through those obstacles.

You guide your client through the discovery process.

You create a system of accountability to help the client take action on his discoveries.

Coaching is about being real. Dealing with what is, rather than what isn't. Developing a bond of trust. It is about opening up to each other.Coaching is also about knowing yourself.

So much of coaching is based on instinct, and questions, and internal examination. If you're not on a journey of self-examination, you're not in tune with yourself, and you're not congruent with what you're asking of your clients.

You need to get real with yourself - know your strengths, and your challenges.

Know your personality - how are you likely to act, to react, to choose to do work. Know your striving instincts to get work done. Know your skill base.

Know your limitations, and where to get resources.When clients are looking for a coach in their lives, a life coach, a success coach, they're putting their dreams in your hands. They trust you with their lives, their hopes. It's not something they choose lightly ' there is a lot at stake in giving you that trust. It's not what they stand to lose that scares them. It's what they stand to gain by choosing the right person to guide them.

You will create miracles. Miracles happen all the time, although we don't always identify them in that way. You've heard stories about life-changing experiences. The help you give can change your client's life. A miracle is a shift in perception.

All you have to do is shift someone's perception of the way she sees her life or the way she approaches certain things, and a miracle happens. One minute she's literally going off the road; the next, you have picked her up, set her going in a new direction and her life is changed forever. And you will do it again and again.
7 Tips To Become A Successful Coach
I still remember my first experience as a soccer coach to a team comprising of seven-year olds. I shudder to think how near I came to losing my sanity and my patience when I had to witness them kicking the ball around like a huge bread-crumb infested with ants. It did feel strange at first to have a group of kids stare at you like an outsider in their domain. But that is what every coach has to overcome. Isn't it?

Coaching is encouraging others to perform well. It is also to successfully manage a mixed lot of top performers, standard performers, not-so-good performers and the laggards, each player bearing a "Handle with Care" label. Their egos are so fragile.

Even the underachievers expect to be turned into a roaring success. The whole situation seems like an irony of the saying 'there is no I in team'.Nevertheless, it does take a grinding determination to become a coach. There are seven steps that a coach can take any day.

They are:

1. There are so many options these days as far as team-building tools are concerned. Corporate Team Building has various packages like vacation packages, ice-breakers, office games kept on-going , rope courses, etc. in addition to videos, seminars and books which go to make a team worth belonging to. Some ideas on information on them will follow later.

2. Grasp the main idea behind motivating. You can definitely use it today. Avoid mind-confusing play of words. Decide on three small ways to inspire the team to look forward to the next morning, before you go to bed.

3. Whatever your area of specialization, one can't beat experience when it comes to getting people to put out their best energetic efforts and it is all the more important when you are mixing with your whole team.

4. Remember that a performance can be questioned, but never the ability, intelligence or knowledge. Awareness of what a player goes through to play right will keep you away from the common mistakes of past coaches. I have seen such mistakes of other past coaches aggravate the situation and even build up hostility. You have to set an example on how best to do the job. When you know how badly is the experience at the wrong end, and then perhaps you will be sympathetic about setting out improvement courses.

5. Every coach has to face the worst experience when he has to send the player, even the top performer, to the bench. When you have to deal with such a person, encourage him to see his own follies. An egoistic performer loses his focus even with very small mistakes. It is then that you can correct him or her firmly, but with understanding.

6. Always keep your duties in front of you. You are there to improve them for their benefit. Make them realize this rather than empathizing with them.

7. Last but not the least, trust yourself and the members of your team. Your primary goals are performance and decisions and many are keeping a close watch to see whether they could do a more efficient job. So before sending anyone to the bench, talk to her or him and find out what is bothering them. If it’s something too personal, the best you can do is to offer encouragement to them.

A friendly enthusiastic pat on the back would definitely help.It is very important to be a successful company and being a thorough corporate person myself, I know that we all can partake of that success. You must remember that coaches are employed as guides to help you to put your best foot forward and never to complicate your work. If you use their guidance well, you can prove yourself a credit to them, as well as to yourself.
Techniques Used for Personal Development
As most of the people believe that personal development is a positive way to improve in life, there are also people who find it difficult in accomplishing the techniques used for it. These are the people who are in need of a personal development plan.

The personal-development plan is chalked out in a way that will help you figure out the areas that need improvement. Through this plan, you can also sketch out long term and short term goals that are realistic and will also identify the means to realize the changes that you would take in life.

Finally, it will help you document the necessary steps that would be needed to follow the course of developing skills.Personality development plan starts with identifying the areas that should be improved upon.

You can start off with a list of areas in your life that you find difficult. Then carefully arrange the areas so that you find the most needed area of improvement to have a quick start. With this plan, you can concentrate on the areas that are written down and need to be changed and rather it would become a manageable way to track out changes and find out budding results.

NLP-A personality development technique As there are a number of personality development techniques, NLP is also amongst them. NLP means Neuro-Linguistic Programming. It was a product of 1970s that was the idea of cognitive patterns in creating a form of reality, which by virtue of its ability was to be manipulated. The main goal was to support perceptions usually for the individual self with preferred outcomes like behavioral changes.

Various supporters of NLP have put forward a number of theories and techniques that sought to put desiring shift in personal self image and to improve personal-development. Just like other ideas of personal development NLP was also taken by noted authorities who found new approaches to personal development.

Reiki-Personal development

Reiki is a technique that is used for getting solutions for problems and personal-development. This technique can be used if you need to try out some new ways to develop you personality and find it difficulty in solving problems. The main advantage of Reiki is that you work the technique on you and your family member and someone from a distance. This is also possible in the case of

LTA personality-development technique.

In the method of Reiki you work with energies from the universe while in the case of LTA personal-development technique the therapists work with their energies. For reiki and other related techniques the main difference is the fact that lies in thousands of issues that could not be managed or found a solution for but was treated with LTA and reiki method.

Psychology-Personal Development The effect in developing psychology is that people show more understanding to each other. Not like the early days where people did not show any compassion with the abnormal and weak persons but today psychology has an identity for all kinds of personality learning difficulties or disorders.

JUst chill...........agarbandhu

What Do You REALLY Want?

2009-06-28T20:12:00.000-07:00

What Do You REALLY Want?

The statement, “You can do anything you put your mind to,” leads us to believe that all you must do is imagine what you’d like to accomplish, set your mind to the task, and wait for success.
To a certain degree this is true. Focused intention combined with action is a powerful force. But the statement is misleading because it fails to mention the difficulty and necessity of focusing your mind on a specific goal.
Most of us don’t know what we want. We think we do, but we really don’t. We only know what we don’t want. We don’t want a boring job. We don’t want to be poor. We don’t want to disappoint our loved ones.

Knowing specifically what you want is much different than knowing what you don’t want. When you only know what you don’t want, your intentions aren’t focused.

Consider this example.
Arjun punj doesn’t want to be poor. He’s sick of earning less than his friends, and he’s determined to raise his status. To accomplish this goal, Arjun punj could take many different paths. He could train for a high paying profession, such as doctor or lawyer. He could start his own company, go into real estate, or do many other things that would lead to acquiring wealth.
But Arjun punj isn’t sure what he wants to do. He doesn’t know which path best fits his skills and personality, so he doesn’t resolve to follow any particular path.
Hoping to answer this question, he investigates a dozen possibilities, but as soon as he runs into adversity he decides that path isn’t for him and moves on to a new solution.
Arjun punj ’s actions aren’t focused. Although he works very hard, his efforts don’t build on each other. Rather than building one giant impenetrable sand castle, Arjun punj has built twenty smalls ones that are easily toppled. He ends up confused and discouraged. Ultimately Arjun punj ’s lack of focus leads to failure.
Now, what if Arjun punj had chosen a specific path? Suppose he decided on the law profession. His actions would have been clearly defined:
Get a high score on the LSAT
Attain letters of recommendation
Get accepted to a good law school
Decide on a field of law
Earn a law degree
Find a high paying job with a good law firm
A set of specific goals is much easier to achieve than a vague end goal like becoming wealthy. Being focused on a path gives a logical set of actions to follow. Each accomplishment is one step closer to the final goal.
I think we can all agree that committing to a clearly defined path, regardless of which one, gives Pete the best chance of becoming wealthy.
But how can he choose a path if he doesn’t know what he wants? Maybe money isn’t his only goal. Maybe he wants to do something he loves at the same time. Maybe he can’t afford to go back to school. Reality is complicated, and Pete doesn’t want to commit too soon.
And that’s why he fails.
But I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. Most people don’t fit neatly into a predefined path. Forcing yourself into one may lead to success, but it probably won’t make you happy.
This is the point. If you want to be conventionally successful, to attain wealth and status, you need to choose a specific path (preferably something mainstream) and follow it to the letter.
On the other hand, if you aren’t particularly concerned with wealth or success, you can take your time searching for that perfect niche.
Just don’t wait too long to decide. Each moment you deliberate, your already committed competitors sprint further ahead.
But, then again, maybe life isn’t a race, and maybe the most interesting people follow a path all their own.

Just chill.............agarbandhu

How to Find Your Passion for Anything

2009-06-28T20:08:00.000-07:00

How to Find Your Passion for Anything

There’s a big myth in our culture: that passion can only be spontaneous. You either love your job or you don’t. You either enjoy exercising or hate it. You are interested in reading books or you find them boring. That passion can’t be forced or created.
I disagree. Passion can be created. Even for things you don’t currently enjoy.
By tweaking the activities and pursuits you engage in, you can find a passion for anything. All it takes is a bit of patience and an open mind.
The benefit is that you end up loving the things you have to do anyways. Exercising, learning, studying, working and almost any pursuit can be made into a passion. And if you know how to do it, existing passions can be turned from mildly interesting to exciting. The skill of finding your passion is like turning up the dial for the amount of color you experience in life.Here are some ways to find your passion:
1. Get Curious - Curiosity is the basis of passion. Shake off your current understandings and begin from the view that you are almost completely ignorant on the subject. Then look for novelty to boost your interest.
2. Make it a Game - Give yourself rules, objectives and strategic constraints. The more creative thinking required the better.
3. Set a Goal - Create a specific goal along with a deadline. This can infuse mundane activities with a sense of direction and purpose. Writing a report goes from being just another task, to a creative challenge that pushes you.
4. Express Yourself - Find hidden opportunities for self-expression. This could mean inventing a style for folding clothes. Changing the format you write code in or altering the style of your presentation. View each activity as an act of expression and originality.
5. Focus - Cut distractions and eliminate noise. The more you focus on an activity the better you can notice interesting qualities about it. The only truly boring activity is the one you can’t pay attention to.
6. Jigsaw Piecing - A jigsaw puzzle has hundreds of uniquely shaped pieces of a picture. View your activities as pieces of a larger image. This can turn dull activities into individual snippets of a more fascinating whole.
7. Dial Down Cravings - Have you ever noticed how the hungrier you are, the less able you are to enjoy the taste of food? This works the same way with passion. The more you crave a goal (instead of the process containing the goal) the less likely you are to develop a passion for it. Goal-setting is good. Goal-obsession is not.
8. Connect with Talents - How can you apply your existing talents to an activity? Find ways to use skills you already have in a new endeavor. An artistic person could draw pictures to help himself study. An athletic person might be able to use her strength and endurance as a speaker.
9. Overcome the Frustration Barrier - If an activity is too difficult for you to become enthusiastic about it, slow down. Worry less about results and more about experimenting until you build up skill. Whenever I try a new hobby, I strive to just try things out before building skills. This keeps me from getting frustrated and ensures the process is fun.
10. Leech Enthusiasm - Energy is contagious. If you spend time with someone who exudes passion about a subject, some of it will rub off on you. Seek out people who have the energy you want and get them to describe their motivation. Often it will point you to key information you had no idea could be so interesting.
11. Remove the Chains - Feeling forced into an activity is a sure way to kill any passion. Instead of flowing with the task, you rebel against it, making you miserable. Be aware of the consequences for not acting, but remove the feeling that you don’t have a choice. You always have a choice.
12. Tune the Challenge - For boring tasks, make them more difficult. For frustrating tasks, make them easier. This can be done by varying the speed or constraints you need to complete a task. Boring chores can be made more interesting by setting a time-limit. Frustrating assignments can be made easier by allowing yourself an awful first-draft instead of perfection.
13. Get instruction - Finding a teacher can give you the basic level of understanding necessary to enjoy an activity. Sometimes passion can be drained just by not knowing the basics.
14. Humble confidence - Confidence is necessary for passion, but arrogance can destroy it. Build a humble confidence where you believe in your abilities to handle the unknown, but you also have a great respect for it.
15. Focus Immediately - Look at the next immediate step. Don’t concern yourself over what needs to be done next month or next year if it overwhelms you. Focus on each step of the marathon, not how many miles you have left.
16. Play - If the process confuses or bothers you, just play with it. Don’t have a purpose until you can define one.
17. Eliminate - This one might not apply, but it is always good to use. If you really can’t enjoy something, find a way to eliminate it from your life. Don’t waste your time doing things you don’t enjoy. Either cultivate a passion or get rid of it.

Just chill..............agarbandhu

Qualities of a good teacher

2009-06-26T20:55:00.000-07:00

Qualities of a good teacher

Teachers are role models for many students. I personally feel that these are the qualities of a good teacher.

1. The teachers should constantly motivate their students. Never say anything negative about any one. Always the brighter side of any student should be highlighted more to bring in more success from them.

2. The teachers should guide the students to learn lessons from their student's life experiences.

3. The teachers should be able to impart the fact that knowledge gives every other things in life.

4. The teachers should be able to co-relate the student's feelings and emotions with their behavior. The teacher should be a friend to them when the students are in sorrow or when they are rejoicing.

5. The teachers should be able to accomplish and accept new ideas and thoughts. At times, the students give better ideas than the teachers and the teachers should be able to accept them without posing any ego.

6. Teachers should have lots of creativity to teach the young minds. They should be able to make activity based learning possible which will make the students understand better. This kind of approach will be definitely acknowledged the best by the students and that teacher is sure to be known for these methods of teaching.

7. High sense of humor will reduce the line of barriers between the students and teachers. This sense of humor helps in tougher situations. This kind of teacher is sure to gain more regards from not just the students but also from their parents. But with this sense of humor, the teacher should also be firm.

8. Students are different, some are visual learners, some are auditory and some learn through constant touching and practice. The teacher has to be able to present the subject on par with all these type of learners.

9. The teacher, whatever be their emotion of the day, should not show it out and maintain calmness. If the teacher goes out of control, the students get either out of control or get overly scared.

10. The teacher should be a good listener, which will help them to distress the students.

11. The teachers should respect their students and also their colleagues. Never talk ill about another teacher to students, this will make the teacher loose respect among the students.

12. The teachers are the role models, the teachers are every one's inspirations, the teachers are guides; so the teachers should be constantly updating themselves.

Just chill............agarbandhu

Getting People to Listen to You

2009-06-26T20:51:00.000-07:00

Getting People to Listen to You

Everyone wants to have others listen to what they have to say. Other people will listen if it appears you have some interesting, valuable or important information to convey. They will also consider the source of the information and whether there is a possible or promised reward for listening. To get people to listen, you must have something to say or be able to provide some motivation for them.
Questions you may have include:
What is interesting or valuable information?
What sort of rewards would cause someone to listen?
How do you provide what they want?
This lesson will answer these questions.
Types of information
People will listen to what you say, if it is interesting, valuable, important or useful to them. Obviously, if you provide boring information, they will quickly tune out.
Interesting
Interesting information is something that you might want to know about or that may be amusing, entertaining or clever. It may be about the other person or something in which he or she is involved. Often, clever or unusual information is considered interesting.
Most people like to talk and hear about themselves or their interests.
Valuable
Information that is valuable would be something that might result in personal gain for the other person. For example, you might tell another person, "I have some valuable information concerning the stock market."
A salesman may often have supposedly valuable information on how you can save money by buying his product.
Important
Information that is important is something that it vital, critical or highly desired. It is information that if not heeded or received can result in negative consequences.
Examples of important information might be that you need to go to a meeting at 10:00 AM at work or that you left your car lights on.
Useful
Useful information concerns what you can use or apply. For example, someone might tell you a good way to prevent squirrels from getting in the bird feeder.
Boring
Useless or boring information is often things about another person or some subject about which you don't care.
Sources of information
The source of information determines whether or not a person will care to listen to it. If the person seems to be a viable source of important, useful or valuable information, you will tend to listen to it. If the person seems to have little creditability, his talking may go on deaf ears.
Friends
You often will listen to relatives, friends and acquaintances because of the social understanding that they will--in turn--listen to what you have to say. It is a fair exchange, usually not having to do with content.
Charisma
People who have good voices, charisma or are animated are often listened to as being interesting or entertaining.
Power
People with wealth and power will usually be listened to, because of their social position and ability to reward or punish, even if what they say is drivel.
You will listen to you boss talk about his personal experiences, even if they are boring, because you don't want to offend him.
Poor impression
If you can't reward another person, you sound boring or give the impression of not being worthwhile, other people often will not listen to the information you may have to give.
Getting people to listen
There are a number of things you can do to get people to listen to what you have to say.
Make a strong impression
Probably the most important thing to do in trying to get other people to listen to what you have to say is to make an impression of being a good source of interesting, useful, important or valuable information. This means that you should make sure what you say is worthwhile.
Know subject and person
You must also know whether your information is important, valuable or useful to the other person. You really have to know what the other person likes for you to pick an interesting topic.
Use qualifiers
Some people use qualifiers before they speak. They can be effective in getting and keeping attention:
"This is real interesting. The paper says a man bit a dog."
"I've got some information that should be valuable to you. They're hiring a McDonald's."
"Quite please. This is important. Everyone must remain in their seats until the bell rings."
"Here's some information that should be useful to you. You can stop fish from smelling, by clogging up their noses."
On the other hand:
"Let me tell you about all the problems I've had throughout my life. First of all, 10 years ago..." Boring!
Be rich and beautiful
Obviously, if you have money, fame, good looks or such, people will tend to listen to you more than to the average person.
Summary
People will listen if you have some interesting, valuable or important information to say or if you are consider a source possible rewards. To get people to listen, you must have something to say or be able to provide some motivation for them. You can also use qualifiers to get their attention.

Just chill............agarbandhu

Making an Impression of Being Valuable or Important

2009-06-26T20:48:00.000-07:00

Making an Impression of Being Valuable or Important

When you are trying to provide another person with a valuable product, service or information, the person will first evaluate whether he feels you can deliver what is promised. This evaluation is done through the impression you project. Although the first impression is the most important, every time you interact, you make an impression that builds to form your reputation.
Questions you may have include:
What does the person evaluate?
How is an impression made?
Why is the first impression so important?
This lesson will answer those questions.
What is evaluated?
Whenever you interact with another person, that person makes evaluations concerning your intelligence, character, social standing and such. These evaluations or judgments are derived from subtle clues, taken from what he or she sees and hears from you.
Likewise, you do the same thing about the other person. You may observe the way the person dresses, how he carries himself, how he acts, how he sounds, and implications from what he says, and you pass judgment from those items.
This determines the impression each makes on the other.
Impression
There is the visual impression and how a person sounds.
Visual impression
When you come into contact with another person, you see him or her first and make some quick evaluations on how the person acts and dresses.
How someone acts
The way or person acts is probably the most important determining factor in the impression he makes. A person may give the impression of being self-assured, confident, important, or knowledgeable. Or the person can appear nervous, unsure and not having much to offer.
How someone looks
The way a person dresses gives in indication of the person's wealth, social standing, vanity, cleanliness and taste. The physical appearance of a person can indicate if he is intelligent, healthy, or desirable. It seems that good-looking people make a better impression that homely people.
How person sounds
Likewise, the sound of a person's voice can determine how much attention you pay to him. Part of the voice is also determined by how it is projected, such as being confident or unsure.
Importance of first impression
An impression is made quickly with intuition. To try to convince a person that the impression was incorrect takes logic. It is still difficult to overcome the "gut feeling" the person may have from the first impression.
When you first meet a person, the amount of confidence shows up immediately. If you are unsure, your voice can tell. Even if you later show confidence and a sure voice, the person may think it is just an act.
The "act" must be performed the first time you meet the person.
Summary
You must not only sell the other person that what you have to offer is valuable, but you must also create an impression that you can deliver that item. Once you create the positive impression, you are considered a valuable and even important person.

JUst chill.............agarbandhu

About Good Working Habits

2009-06-26T20:45:00.000-07:00

About Good Working Habits

Certainly it is very important to have good working habits for maintaining your personal as well as professional life in a great way. Unless you are disciplined in your attitude towards life, your life can become a big chaos full of messy and undesirable stuff. So incorporate good working habits in your life to take your life to the ladder of success. Some of such habits are mentioned below in this article-just make smart use of them.
In your office as well as home, clean up your desk of all those papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand. Remember that constant reminder of ‘a million tings to-do and no time to do them’ can worry you not only into tension and fatigue, but it can also worry you into high blood pressure, heart problem and stomach ulcers.
So keep only which is required at present! Mind it that a person does not die from overwork, but they die from dissipation and worry. So maintain a good balance between your present work and those that you have to do for your future.
Make sure you always do the things in the order of their importance. This way, all the work will get finished in the best manner without any kind of mistake on your part. It will also avoid you falling into the jeopardy of doing things in a hasty manner. Plus you will be able to finish the work on time.
Whenever you face any problem, solve it there and then. Gather the respective information and facts relating to your problem and work over them instead of delaying the things.Moreover for preventing fatigue and worry in your work and life, just add the element of enthusiasm and fun to it. Believe me, once you start enjoying your work, you will gain better in future.

Just chill.............agarbandhu

Thought of the Day

2009-06-26T20:37:00.000-07:00

"Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy"

Norman Vincent Peale

just chill........agarbandhu

Solving Problems at Work

2009-06-26T20:24:00.001-07:00

Solving Problems at Work

Everyone encounters problems periodically. Some people seem to have more problems than others, some problems are bigger than others or more troublesome than others, but life is definitely full of problems waiting to be solved. The career exploration and job-seeking process is rife with problems: what jobs match your career interests, where are the jobs you'd like to do, how do you convince an employer that you're the best candidate for a job, how to please your boss once you are hired, and so forth. But it is when you have secured employment that you may need to do your best problem solving in order to maintain or keep your job and, hopefully, advance.
The problem-solving model described below details a process for analyzing and resolving problems. Although the model appears to be quite simple, it actually involves a considerable amount of work on your part...it is simple, but not easy! If you follow the suggested steps, you can gain control of almost any difficult or confusing situation by analyzing the problem that is occurring and identifying possible solutions to it. Each stage of the problem-solving model is listed first and the anticipated outcome goal for each stage is listed parenthetically after it; then, the suggested strategies for achieving the goal follow in bulleted format.
Self-Exploration
Outcome goal: identify your problem
Strategies:
· Think about what is bothering you—can you describe the problem?
· Write out how you feel—what you feel is wrong in your life at this moment.
· Talk to someone who truly cares about you and ask what he or she thinks is getting in your way or causing you difficulty.
· Write out what you think the problem is in behavioral terms—describe the situation as objectively as possible. What behaviors are you or others doing to cause conflict or anxiety in your life?
Understanding
Outcome goal: develop your plan to solve the problem
Strategies:
· Answer the following questions: 1. "How are you contributing to the problem?" 2. "How are others contributing to the problem?" 3. "How does the environment or society contribute to the problem?" 4. "What has kept you from solving this problem to date?"
· Brainstorm (discuss openly) the situation with others who care about you to determine their perspective and their answers to the same four questions.
· Write out your answers and the answers that others have given you.
· Think about what you have written and determine what the parameters of the problem truly are based on all the answers to these four questions.
· Write out what you consider to be viable solutions...ideas for solving the problem that you have seen work for others or that you simply think might work for you.
· Brainstorm with others—what would they do in similar circumstances?
· Write out their ideas—capture all of their ideas whether you think they are good ideas or not (try not to value judge the ideas that others share with you) and add them to the list of ideas that you generated earlier. Hint: If you think you can't capture other people's ideas quickly by writing them out, consider tape recording their ideas and transferring them to print or braille later.
· Read through all of the ideas on your list.
· Eliminate any ideas on your list that you feel are silly or don't make good sense to you.
· Rank your list of viable ideas from the easiest to the hardest idea to do.
· Develop your action plan based on your rank ordered list.

Some tips:

1. Date your plan. Put today's date on it.

2. Be sure to set up your plan with the easiest thing to do first. Call that step one and identify start and finish dates (when you hope to accomplish the first step).

3. List each step with start and finish dates, understanding that you can always adjust your dates, if necessary.

4. Identify the key people with whom you will share your plan. It's more likely to happen if others know about it!

5. Identify how you will know when you have accomplished all of the steps—in other words, what is the solution you are hoping to achieve?

6. Identify how you will reward yourself at completion. We all need rewards—yours may be a walk in the park, a bubble bath, a new CD, a new outfit, a trip to the ball park, whatever your heart desires!
Action
Outcome goal: implement your plan
Strategies for keeping up with your plan:
· Post the written copy of your plan in a conspicuous place.
· Give copies of your plan to others who care about you in their preferred reading medium.
· Ask your friends and family with whom you have shared your plan to give you feedback as they see you working on it. If they see that you are not following through with the plan, ask them to call your inactivity to your attention.
· Evaluate your progress frequently—note whether or not you are accomplishing the steps in the timeframe that you defined.
· Reward yourself at the completion of each step in the process.
· If you find that you are not making progress, reconsider the steps you've listed. Did you identify the easiest thing to do first? Did you start there? Is there something else that you need to do before you can begin? What is it? Write it down and start with it!
· Are you stuck? If so, you may want to find a "good ear" and talk about what's keeping you from progressing.
· If all else fails, revisit the model—explore, understand, act! You may have identified the wrong problem or there may be another problem that demands attention before you can solve the problem you've been attempting to solve.
· Don't blame others for your problem—if something is bothering you, it's your problem and you need to solve it!
· Don't rationalize your problem—if something is bothering you, it's your problem and you need to solve it!
· Don't ignore your problem—if something is bothering you, it's your problem and you need to solve it!
· Be patient with yourself!
Good luck and happy problem solving!

Just chill........agarbandhu

Communicating on the Job

2009-06-26T20:20:00.000-07:00

Communicating on the Job

If you want to:
· Make a good impression in an interview
· Get along well with employers and co-workers
· Develop strong, healthy relationships
· Have close friends
· Be a better friend
· Get along well with family members, teachers, and people in your community
· Advance at work
...follow the communication guidelines listed below.
Do:
1. Attend to the speaker. Look at people when they talk to you. If you can't see, orient toward the speaker's voice. Give the speaker all of your attention.
Attending means that you don't do anything else but listen to the speaker. You don't fiddle with your papers, answer your phone, look out the window, look at someone else passing by, fidget, or otherwise pay attention to something other than the speaker. You periodically nod your head or make an appropriate facial expression to match the speaker's message (a smile or frown depending on the content of what's being said.)
2. Listen to what the speaker is saying.
· Listen to what is actually said (hear the words).
· Listen to what is not said—"read between the lines" (listen for voice intonation).
· Listen for feeling. Try to guess how the speaker is feeling based on what you hear in his or her voice. Is the speaker happy, sad, fearful, or angry? Don't worry about guessing incorrectly, the speaker will clarify if you guess his or her feeling incorrectly! If you try to determine how the speaker is feeling by guessing, it lets the speaker know that you care enough about him or her to be paying attention.
· Try to determine the message the speaker is trying to impart. Ask if you are unsure, "Are you saying that...?" or "Do you mean...?" or "do I understand you to say...?"
3. Say something in reply that shows you understood how the speaker feels and that you care about the message being relayed to you.
You might say, "I appreciate you taking time to share...with Me." or "Thanks for getting back to me about..."
Don't:
1. Say anything hateful or rude. Don't respond to a speaker with comments such as, "That's a stupid thing to say!" or "What a dumb idea!"
2. Give advice. Although people often ask for advice, it's a very tricky situation because you can't solve another person's problem. He or she needs to solve it! If you give someone advice and your idea works, the person will come to rely on you for ideas every time there's a problem in his or her life. If you give someone advice and your idea doesn't work, the person will resent the fact that you didn't help him or her. Giving advice is a no-win proposition! If you are asked for advice, give the person as many ideas as you can—at least two or three ideas, never just one—and let the person choose which idea he or she might want to try.
3. Change the subject or the direction of the conversation. There are three ways that people typically change the focus of conversation and they are listed below.
Changing the focus to yourself. You often hear people saying things like, "The same thing happened to me." When you do that, you change the focus from the speaker to you. Don't!

Changing the focus to some insignificant detail. Stay focused on what the speaker is saying and don't interrupt with questions about details. If the speaker wants you to know some of the details of what he or she is concerned about, the speaker will tell you. When you are the listener, it's your job to listen and not talk!
Changing the focus entirely. If someone is uncomfortable with a message being conveyed he or she will simply shift to a completely different topic...don't! If someone is sharing something with you, you need to pay attention and consider what he or she is saying, even if you don't want to do so!
After reading this list of communication dos and don'ts, you may be thinking that you can follow these guidelines but you know that others will not necessarily notice or appreciate your efforts. That may be true at times, but the more often you follow these guidelines the more likely others will follow suit and follow them too. Try it. See if you can encourage better communication from others by being a better communicator yourself.
Applying good communication skills can help you obtain and maintain employment, and even advance in your career.

JUst chill...............agarbandhu

Employer Expectations Over Time

2009-06-26T20:17:00.000-07:00

Employer Expectations Over Time

First Day and First Week
· From the beginning, employees are expected to be on time—no excuses! (If you are unsure of how long it will take to travel to and from a new job, consider a trial run before you start. Travel at approximately the same time and follow the same route you anticipate traveling in the future.)
· Likewise, new employees are expected to dress appropriately and be well-groomed...every day. Some companies have "Casual Fridays," which means that on Friday you can dress down, but still wear clean and appropriate, albeit casual, clothing. (Tip: A good job-related question in an interview is to ask about the company's dress code.)
· Although new employees are not be expected to recognize and remember the full names of all the people they are introduced to in the first week of work, it is important to make an effort to be pleasant and to remember as many names as possible—especially the names of the coworkers in your immediate area and your supervisor.
· New employees should expect to be supervised closely at first as they learn and develop skills specific to their new jobs. You must listen closely to instructions or read instructions thoroughly and pay close attention to corrections. New employees are expected to ask questions, if there is something they don't understand.
· During the first week, a worker establishes his or her work reputation. By working hard and being productive, a worker makes a good first impression...remember, first impressions are difficult to change!
First Month
· Employees are expected to be at work and to be there on time because others are depending on them. They are expected to take only pre-determined or arranged lunch and break times.
· They are expected to know written and unwritten company policies.
· By the end of the first month, new employees are expected to know the majority of their coworkers and the supervisory staff by name.If you are relying on voice cues rather than visual cues, you are only expected to recognize those workers in your immediate area by the end of the first month. In fact, depending on the number of workers in your immediate area you may have greater latitude on this point.
· By the end of the first month, new employees are expected to know about informal structures (cliques) and how to fit in at work. It is important as a new employee for you to resist the temptation to gossip and repeat or take rumors seriously.
· Within the first month, new employees are expected to acclimate to their environment—to know where to go for what and to whom to go for what.
· Your boss will expect you to show an increase in your production and a decrease in the amount of supervision you need. It is anticipated that you will know your job responsibilities and a little bit about the job responsibilities of others.
· Finally, it is important to determine the company's policy regarding performance evaluations and probationary periods within the first month in order to begin preparation for yours.
Six Months to One Year
· By this point in an employee's work life, primary job responsibilities should be second nature.
· You will be expected to complete your job tasks and assist newly hired workers.
· You will be expected to be self-directed and able to find productive things to do even in slack times.
· You will be expected to be willing to expand your work skills through off-the-job training (in company sponsored training classes or courses offered in the community).
· You will be expected to demonstrate your commitment to the company through active involvement in company-sponsored events or community projects.
· Finally, you should continue to be diligent (no long weekends or feigned illnesses to use sick time). Don't develop a false sense of security—remember, if the company doesn't perform well, employees (even good ones!) may find themselves downsized!
Relationships and expectations change over time. It is important to understand how an employer's expectations change over time. What an employer expects from his or her workers when they first meet or on the first day of work is much more lenient than expectations at six months or a year.
Likewise, coworkers have very different expectations of a peer after a "break-in" period. Most coworkers expect to help newly hired coworkers "learn the ropes" and become acquainted with the workplace. Although they don't usually mind if someone new to the office asks for help or clarification, they will soon tire of being asked the same question over and over or being relied upon to do another worker's problem solving repeatedly.
Within a reasonable period of time, usually 3 to 6 months, employees are expected by coworkers and supervisors to be able to function fairly independently.

Just chill.................agarbandhu

Building Positive Work Habits: The Perfect Worker

2009-06-26T20:09:00.000-07:00

Building Positive Work Habits: The Perfect Worker

What the Employer Really Wants
There are some work habits that all employers hope their new hires will have. Consider how you match up to the attributes of the "perfect worker."
· Punctuality - being on time every day
· Attendance - being at work unless you are truly ill or there is an emergency
· Productivity - working to assure both quality and quantity measures are met
· Initiative - starting work without being told to do so
· Cooperation - getting along with people...boss, coworkers, customers
· Attention to Details - following rules or directions
· Accuracy - not making mistakes
· Adaptability - can do more than one job task
· Diligence - improving job performance routinely
· Appearance - always presents in appropriate clothing and accessories
· Open-mindedness - accepts constructive criticism
· Honesty and Trustworthiness - doesn't cheat, steal, or lie
Consider how many of the work habits listed above you demonstrate in your current work, school, or home situation. Are there habits you need to improve—what are they? How can you improve in these areas?

Just chill.................agarbandhu

Motivating Others to Act

2009-06-25T21:12:00.000-07:00

Motivating Others to Act

Motivating others is the process of giving another person an incentive to move him or her to some desired action. It is an important factor in business and sales. Whether or not the action is taken depends on weighing the desire for the reward or the fear of punishment versus the work required.
Questions you may have include:
What type of promises or threats can you give?
What is the action or work required?
What determines the person's motivation to seek the reward?

This lesson will try to answer these questions.
Promise or threaten
To motivate another person, you must promise or offer something that the person wants, threaten to take away something the person does not want to lose, or threaten harm to the person.
Desire
People desire things that gives them pleasure, satisfaction or enjoyment. They may also desire products or services that will help solve problems or concerns.
Salesmen will often paint a picture of the benefits of using a product or service, such that the customer can visualize the rewards and pleasure achieved. Some examples are:
It will save you work and time
It will make a great impression on your friends and neighbors
It tastes great and is less filling
Employers will often use incentives to motivate their workers to greater productivity. Money has always been a good motivator, because people can then buy whatever they want. Managers may also promise a promotion or special recognition to motivate their people.
Punishment
The threat of punishment can also be used to motivate others.
A robber can threaten harm in order to motivate a victim to hand over his money
Parents often threaten to punish their children to get them to behave
The government threatens punishment to those breaking the law in order to promote social order
Combination
A combination of the promise of a reward and the threat of punishment is often an effective way to motivate. It is called the "carrot and stick method" of motivation.
An employee will do a good job at work under the promise of a raise and the threat of losing his job.
Requirement
Although the desire for the product or service can be built up, the required action is a determining factor in motivation. What do you require the person to do to try to get the reward?
Rewards
The car salesman has created a desire for a stylish, safe, economical automobile in the eyes of the potential customer. But there is the requirement that the customer pay a substantial amount of money to fulfill his dream.
Other examples of requirements for getting rewards include:
The employee must work overtime to get a promotion
The child must get good grades to get the desired bicycle
The audience must pay money to see their favorite singer entertain
Punishment
Examples of requirements to avoid punishment include:
The worker must come to work on time or be docked pay
The person must give his money or the robber will harm him
You must take out the garbage or suffer a smelly house
Decision and motivation
By weighing the value or importance of what you promise or threaten versus the work or action required, the person you are trying to motivate makes decision whether or not to try to get what he or she wants.
Motivate your children
You want to motivate your children to get better grades in school. You offer to take them to Magic Mountain, if they promise to study and extra 30 minutes each night. The cost doesn't seem so bad compared to the value of going to the amusement park, so they are motivated to agree.
Motivate a dog
You want your dog to behave in a certain way. You offer a treat for it to do a task, but you also scold the animal if it does not obey. The combination of a reward and punishment motivates the dog to do what you want it to do.
Summary
Although you must enhance the benefits and desire for a reward, you must also make the requirements palatable and easy, so that the person or animal will remain motivated to do as you want.

Just chill..............agarbandhu

Motivation: The driving force

2009-06-25T21:08:00.000-07:00

Motivation: The driving force

Motivation is the driving force causing a person or animal to try to get what he or she wants. It is the inner urge or incentive to move to action. The more valuable or important the reward is, the greater the motivation. But whether or not the action is taken depends on weighing the desire for the reward or the fear of punishment versus the work or action required.
Questions you may have include:
What type of desires do people have?
What is the action or work required?
What determines your motivation to try?

This lesson will try to answer these questions.
Desire
You may have a desire for something that seems like a reward. You want it because it will bring enjoyment, pleasure or some other sort of satisfaction. Examples of things a person may desire are food, money, some fancy gadget, a loving relationship, or some special service.
There are also situations where you may be threatened with some sort of punishment that would cause pain or the loss of something of value or importance to you. For example, a worker may have his job threatened, or a person may be threatened with some sort of violence. The desire here is to protect or maintain what you already have, so you won't lose it.
Requirement
There is a difference between simple desire and the motivation to take action to get what you want. There usually is some work or exchange of goods required to gain the reward or avoid the punishment.
Rewards
Examples of requirement for getting rewards include:
You must work 40 hours for your paycheck
You must pay dearly for the new car you want
You must go to the store to get the food you want
Punishment
Examples of requirements to avoid punishment include:
You must work overtime or lose your job
You must give the robber your money or lose your life
You must take out the garbage or suffer a smelly house
Million dollar prize
Suppose there was a contest with a million dollar prize. You would really like to get that prize. But your motivation would depend on what you would have to do to try for that money. Simply buying a lottery ticket would be worth a try, even though the chances of success are low. But suppose you had to enter in a humiliating contest. You might think twice or forget about it. Your motivation to act is not as high.
Decision and motivation
By weighing the value or importance of what you want versus the negative value of what is necessary, you determine your motivation and make a decision whether or not to try to get what you want.
Buy new car
You really want that new car, but the cost is higher than you can afford. It might result in going deeply in debt. But on the other hand, everyone would be envious of you to have such a car. Seeing yourself driving that car is more valuable to you than the excessive cost. You are thus motivated enough to make the purchase.
Give up your money
The robber points a gun at you and demands your money. You need the money to pay the rent. But your life is obviously more valuable than what you can do with the money. The motivation is high enough to give your money to the robber.

Work overtime
The boss says you must work overtime this weekend. You had planned on going fishing and don't really want to work the long hours. If you refuse to work, you may be punished by losing your job. On the other hand, if you do work, you will get time-and-a-half in pay. The threatened punishment and the promised extra pay, outweigh your desire to relax and provide sufficient motivation to go to work on Saturday.
Get a better job
The promise of a better job can often motivate a person. This is especially true if the fort required is not that difficult.
An example can be seen from baseball great Henry (Hank) Aaron.
Aaron grew up in the deep south of the United States, and his father had given him advice never to move more than you have to. Thus, Aaron wasn't known as a hard worker, when he was playing minor league baseball. But one day, he heard that a major league scout was visiting the team to select some players to advance to the big league.
Hank really wanted to play in the major leagues, and this was his big opportunity. He disregarded his father's poor advice and played that day like a man possessed, moving quickly and trying to make sensational plays.
His motivation resulted in getting selected to play for the then Boston Braves, and he later became and all-time great ball player.
Summary
Weighing the value or and your desire for a reward and/or fear of punishment against the work required, determines your motivation to do the task.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

Make Yourself Valuable in Your Job

2009-06-25T20:48:00.000-07:00

Make Yourself Valuable in Your Job

A person is hired to work for a company because they need his or her services to help them make a profit from their goods or services. To some degree, they pay the employee according to the value provided to the company. Supply and demand also come into play in wages or salary. If you make yourself more valuable, you may reap rewards.
Questions you may have include:
What are examples of valuable employees?
How is value determined in a job?
How can you make yourself more valuable?

This lesson will answer those questions.
Valuable employees
All employees should contribute to a company's profits. Some are considered more valuable that others, usually in relation to the amount of profits they produce.
Top executives
Top executives of companies, such as the Chief Executive Officer (CEO) and President, are considered very valuable to their companies, because they make solid business decisions that bring in profits and dividends to the stockholders.
In return for their value, some top executives receive million dollar bonuses on top of their large salaries.
In many situations such a bonus may be appropriate, but there have been cases where stockholders have complained about them--especially when the company is losing money--only to have the Board of Directors overrule them. This is like the workers overruling the owners.
Top salesman valuable
A salesman who brings in a multi-million dollar contract is certainly considered valuable to the company. Companies often pay high commissions to such an employee, in order to keep the person in the company.
Not appreciated
Ross Perot was such a good salesman for IBM that his commissions put his wages above those of the top executives. Although he was extremely valuable to the company--and also very difficult to replace--the executives put a cap on his earnings. Perot then left the company and started Electronic Data Services (EDS) and became a multi-millionaire. He later unsuccessfully ran for President of the U.S.
Valuable workers
Workers with specialized skills are usually considered valuable to the company and paid accordingly. The average worker is paid according to the skill-level of the job and the supply of workers. When unemployment is high, wages tend to drop.
Determining value
Often it is very difficult for a company to determine the value of an employee. Usually, that is determined by supply and demand. They may need a certain type of worker and have to pay dearly, even though the added value to the end product is not that great.
In many cases, the value of a person is perceived and not actual. A person who is friends with the boss is perceived as more valuable to a company than a person who actually does valuable work, but who is not liked.
Low-paid worker
Consider a person who works in the department store warehouse, putting price labels on clothes items. The person gets paid Rs. 1500/- P.C.M., but the company pays Rs. 3500/-PCM including insurance, benefits, etc. If the worker averages 240 labels an hour, that adds Rs. 0.05 to the cost of each item.
This job is important, because they need the price tags on the items, but it does not really increase the value of the product much. Also, since it is unskilled labor, the supply of workers is great. Thus the hourly pay is low.
Programmer
A computer programmer can count the hours spent on developing a software application and see the savings to the company or how much they make on the product. It is sort of like a return-on-investment for the company.
Your value
An interesting exercise is to try to figure out your value to your company. In some cases, you can estimate how many products that you contribute to, what the company charges for them, and how much they pay you for the contribution.
Make yourself more valuable
No matter what your position in a company, you want to make yourself more valuable to them. This will not only help you get raises and promotions, but it will also ensure job-security.
Gain skills
Ways to be more valuable in your job include finding ways to do your job better or quicker, thus saving the company money. Increasing your skills, so you can do more needed work for the company. Performing extra duties, beyond the scope of your job description.
Must be careful
You must be careful, though, in seeking ways to be more valuable. Sometimes a worker will do something he thinks is valuable, only to be shot-down by his superiors. Sometimes they don't want people to try to be more valuable, because it is a threat of one sort of another.
Summary
Executives, salesmen, and workers contribute to the profits of a company. The value of some can be directly related to the profits, while other jobs are viewed as necessary expenses or costs. You can improve the way you work, come up with cost-savings ideas, improve your skills and do extra tasks to improve your value.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

10 practical learner-centric teaching strategies

2009-06-25T20:45:00.000-07:00

10 practical learner-centric teaching strategies

Here are some simple and practical student-friendly teaching techniques which can be incorporated into the classroom. These techniques, if used purposefully, puts the learner at the centre of the learning experience by increasing their participation and engagement in a classroom; providing an opportunity of molding their learning experience; and by building a connection between the environment and concepts taught.
PRACTICAL EXAMPLES: Connecting theory with environment
The introduction of practical examples into the subject matter serves as an enhancement and is complementary to the concepts taught in the classroom. Note that it is important to develop the conceptual and practical base simultaneously since neither is useful without the other.
SHOW AND TELL: Reversing Teacher - Student Roles
The “Show and Tell” technique can be used in various forms depending on the subject content, the age group of the students and the degree of their sophistication. In its most elementary form, show-and-tell can a form of story-telling (development of communication skills); and in its more advanced form is another type of the “Practical Examples” technique. Putting the students into the role of a teacher makes the students look deeper into the assigned problem.
CASE STUDIES: Bringing “Real-Life” Scenarios into the Classroom
Cases are accounts of “real-life” activity, they help the students to better relate concepts to the “real-world”. In this method, Learners can be required to work either individually or in groups. The case method promotes classroom discussions, problem solving and feedback from learners.
GUIDED TEAM PROJECTS: Introducing practical experience into Classrooms
Team projects can be short projects/activities which are completed in one classroom session or longer projects/ activities which span multiple sessions. Team projects give learners an opportunity to work in a team environment, applying concepts learned in the classroom. Students work together in teams generating ideas/solving problems/illustrating concepts while giving the entire class opportunity to participate and reflect during the presentation.
OPEN-ENDED LABS: Making learners think deeper
Open-ended laboratory classes are classes where the students are encouraged to design their own experience / concepts or experiments, rather than required to follow a rigid set of guidelines specified by the teacher. This learning strategy is all about exploring alternative methods of doing things which results in a deeper understanding on what works and what does not while fostering creativity and lateral thinking.
THE FLOWCHART TECHNIQUE: Organizing flow of thought
The technique of flowcharting, as applied to a classroom scenario, is a tool for precisely and concisely representing the flow of information among various stages in the development of a concept; in the formulation or analysis of a problem; providing linkages between various steps; and presenting information / thought.
OPEN-ENDED QUIZZES: Moving students away from memorization
Open ended quizzes (e.g. problems that do not specify all information to arrive at the answer; problems that require students to use their judgement, etc) are an enhancement of the straightforward “Given this, calculate that” or “Plug and chug” type of quizzes that merely encourage students to memorize. The open-ended quiz is intended to stimulate students’ creativity and help students think deeply about the material covered in the classroom.
BRAINSTORMING: Encouraging creativity
The brainstorming technique is widely used in industry and academia to encourage participants to generate ideas in an unhindered manner. In an academic context, brainstorming encourages students to participate actively in idea-generation exercises and experience benefits of a multi-dimensional approach to analyzing problems or solutions. The brainstorming technique is applicable to all levels of the curriculum and to all teaching scenarios - labs, lectures or discussion.
4MAT: Catering to multiple learning preferences
The 4MAT approach caters to the multiple learning profiles of students (recall, understanding, application and synthesis) and each lesson is planned to focus on each preference. Learners are encouraged to participate in all approaches thereby learning through the preferred approach while strengthening their weaker areas.
QUESTION-AND-ANSWER METHOD: Encouraging student participation
This is the most commonly used technique of encouraging learner participation in a classroom. The goal of the question-and-answer method is to draw students into active participation in the teaching and learning process. When used properly (merely posing questions is not enough to motivate learners to move to higher levels of learning) this technique encourages learners to move to higher levels of learning by clarification, expansion, generalization, and inference.
Summation
The teaching strategies mentioned above enrich the classroom environment. The success with which these strategies are used in a classroom is dependent on the skill of the teacher in integrating the strategies into the stated learning outcomes. It requires that the teachers devote time and thought during the planning of the lesson and determine the manner in which these teaching strategies will be used.
It should be noted that that these strategies do not imply a “hands off” policy by the teacher, but is plays a big role by acting as a facilitator / consultant in guiding the learning process. The effectiveness of each of these techniques is only limited by the creativity / enthusiasm of the instructor and the constraints imposed by the system.

Just chill.............agarbandhu

About School

2009-06-25T20:39:00.000-07:00

About School

I came across this poignantly inspirational poem by R. Nukerji in “Global teacher, Global Leaner” by Graham Pike and David Selby. It would be a shame not to share it.

He always wanted to say things. But no one understood.
He always wanted to explain things. But no one cared.
So he drew.
Sometimes he would just draw and it wasn’t anything. He wanted to carve it in stone or write it in the sky.
He would lie out on the grass and look up in the sky and it would be only him and the sky and the things inside that needed saying.
And it was after that, that he drew the picture. It was a beautiful picture. He kept it under the pillow and would let no one see it.
And he would look at it every night and think about it. And when it was dark, and his eyes were closed, he could still see it.
And it was all of him. And he loved it.
When he started school, he brought it with him. Not to show anyone, but just to have it with him like a friend.
It was funny about school.
He sat in a square, brown desk like all other square, brown desks and he thought it should be red.
And his room was a square, brown room. Like all the other rooms.
And it was tight and close. And stiff.
He hated to hold the pencil and the chalk, with his arm stiff and his feet flat on the floor, with the teacher watching and watching.
And then he had to write numbers. And they weren’t anything.
They were worse than the letters that could be something if you put them together.
And the numbers were square and tight and he hated the whole thing.
The teacher came and spoke to him. She told him to wear a tie like all other boys. He said he didn’t like them and she said it didn’t matter.
After that they drew. And he drew all yellow and it was the way he felt about morning. And it was beautiful.
The teacher came to him and smiled at him, “what is this?” she said. “Why don’t you draw something like Ken’s drawing? Isn’t it beautiful?”
It was all questions.
After that his mother bought a tie and he always drew airplanes and rocket ships like everyone else.
And he threw his old picture away.
He was square inside and brown, and his hands were stiff and he was like anyone else. And the thing inside him that needed saying didn’t need saying anymore.
It had stopped pushing. It was crushed. Stiff.
Like everything else.

Just chill..............agarbandhu

How to Live Life

2009-06-25T20:24:00.000-07:00

How to Live Life

ONE.

Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO.

Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE.

Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR..

When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.

FIVE..

When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.

SIX.

Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN.

Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT.

Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE..

Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN...

In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN.

Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE.

Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN! .

When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know ?'

FOURTEEN.

Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN.

Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN.

When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN.

Remember the three R's:

Respect for self;

Respect for others; and

Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN.

Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN.

When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY.

Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice

TWENTY- ONE.

Spend some time alone.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

7 Powerful Relaxation Techniques

2009-06-24T20:47:00.000-07:00

7 Powerful Relaxation Techniques

The stress of modern life can make real relaxation an elusive dream. Yet there is no reason life has to be filled with anxiety and stress. If you take some time to learn the art of relaxation, you can easily rediscover the enjoyment in life. The secret of relaxation is a controlled state of mind. For example, you could spend a whole hour in a health spa; but, if you spend the whole time worrying about what will happen tomorrow, how can you relax?
Relaxation Techniques
1. Now is the only Time that is important - How often do we find ourselves worrying about the future? Anxiety about the future takes up a significant portion of our thoughts. But, to be honest, worrying about the future doesn’t help in any way. If you always live in the past or future you will never be able to relax. To be in a state of relaxation means living only in the present moment.
2. Your environment Matters - Where you spend time has a subtle influence over your state of mind. Consciously we may not be always aware of this; however, you will notice that in some rooms it’s easier to relax and be at peace.

Look at your room; if you see piles of clutter these will act as constant reminders of things you need to do.
These constant subconscious reminders are a heavy weight on the mind. If you tidy up the room and create a pleasant environment, it will make a big difference to your state of mind and enable you to relax. Don’t be reluctant to spend a bit of money on things like air-fresheners and flowers. Spend time tidying up your living/work environment. Its essential to relaxation and will also make you more productive.
3. Meditation - During meditation we actively make time to silence the mind and bring to the fore a real feeling of relaxation. Meditation helps because we learn to control the relentless flow of thoughts. During meditation, the aim is to keep the mind still; this brings clarity and inner peace.

This is the best type of relaxation because we become free from the relentless worries and anxieties of our own making. Find time to meditate for 10 or 15 minutes each day; through meditation we can easily detach ourselves from the pressures of the world.
4. Productivity not Procrastination - Relaxation doesn’t have to mean spending all day on a beach doing nothing. We need to learn how to relax, even in the midst of our daily activities. Prioritize the things that you need to do. If you do things systematically, one at a time, you will feel less stressed and get things done quickly. It’s when we try to do several things at once that we put ourselves under great pressure — this struggle which makes relaxation impossible. Don’t make life hard for yourself. Do one thing at a time and enjoy doing it. When you’ve completed your necessary work, then you have the reward of pleasing yourself without a guilty conscience.
5. Do Not Depend on the Opinions of Others - How much do you depend on the opinion of others? When we worry what people may think or say, we place a burden on our mind. Subconsciously we work towards trying to please others. However, when we have this state of mind it becomes impossible to relax. No matter what we do or say, there will always be someone who manages to criticize or find fault. Therefore, we should develop an attitude of detachment to both praise and criticism.
This doesn’t mean we’re indifferent to the views of others; it just means we won’t allow ourselves to lose our inner peace because of their opinions. This piece of advice isn’t easy to implement but over time we can gradually give less importance to the views of others. Relaxation can only occur if we aren’t constantly thinking about what others are saying and doing.
6. Time to Yourself - Don’t allow yourself to always be at the beck and call of work and other people — make time for yourself. If you are harassed by constant email and phone enquiries, take evasive action. Only take calls and answer emails at certain times of the day. It’s unlikely that your availability, 24 hours a day, is indispensable. When we allow pressures to build up, relaxation becomes very difficult. But, if you really try hard, you should be able to reduce the demands placed on your time and energy.
7. A change is as good as a rest - Life should not be a constantly repeating soap opera. If you find yourself stuck in the same routine, do something completely different. For example, if you spend all your evenings watching rubbish on TV or surfing the internet, you will not get a feeling of real relaxation. Go for a walk or do some sporting activity. The change of scene and activity will help you relax and get away from the monotony and frustration of daily activity.
Relaxation is as simple as gentle Breathing
If you feel stressed take a few moments out. Just watch and be aware of your breathing. Breathe naturally and gently; this will have a very powerful, calming influence on your mind. When you breathe in, feel that you are breathing in inner peace. When you breathe out, feel you are exhaling all your anxieties and worries. Relaxation can be this simple - it doesn’t have to be complicated at all.

Just chill................agarbandhu

The Benefits of Meditation

2009-06-24T20:39:00.000-07:00

The Benefits of Meditation

In a modern world that values activity, achievements and results, it is perhaps surprising that more people are turning to meditation. For all the activity of modern society, many still feel a fundamental need for silence, inner peace, and a moment of reflection. Meditation can reduce stress and help us relax; but, it can also give us a lot more. These are some of the benefits that daily meditation can give us.
Reduced Stress
Meditation helps to reduce stress by teaching us to switch off from the worries that can plague us through the day. Meditation is an opportunity to spend time by ourselves, without feeling at the beck and call of others. Spending 15 minutes in quietening the mind and focusing on the present moment, makes us more relaxed and effective decision makers.
Health Benefits
Numerous studies have shown that meditation has health benefits. Many of these benefits are related to the decrease in stress that occurs through meditation. For example, with lower levels of stress and anxiety, the probability of heart disease diminishes significantly.
This is not to say meditation guarantees you good health. But, there is a growing awareness of the link between our state of mind and physical health. Quite often physical ailments are symptoms of inner turmoil. Meditation can give us peace of mind, and this can be a helpful step in avoiding many stress related ailments. Meditation has also been shown to relieve the pain associated with certain illnesses.
Control Your Own Thoughts
Man has conquered space, Mount Everest and numerous other challenges; but, are we able to conquer our own mind? How often do you find yourself victim to your own negative thoughts? Some people are even of the opinion that it is impossible to control your thoughts. However, the art of meditation teaches that, not only is it possible to control our thoughts, but, we can learn to stop them completely. Through meditation we can bring our unruly mind under control. This creates peace of mind and enables us to achieve what we want to.
Detachment
When we live in the mind it is easy to get distracted by small irritations. For example, maybe we find it intolerable to be kept waiting in a line, or we get upset by a small misdemeanor of another person. The solution is not to avoid these minor problems, because they will keep appearing no matter how hard we may try.
The only effective solution is to develop detachment and keep things in perspective. A powerful benefit of meditation is that we are able to detach ourselves from these insignificant, yet irritating thoughts. This detachment is not indifference; it is just that we are able to maintain equanimity in the midst of life’s inevitable turbulence.
Happiness and Peace of Mind
Is there anybody who does not, in some way, seek after happiness? Meditation takes us to the source of happiness, which is to be found in our own peace of mind. If we have no peace of mind and are constantly attacked by negative thoughts, happiness will remain elusive, no matter how successful we are on an outer plane. It is perhaps hard to imagine that happiness can occur from the simple act of being. However, if we can meditate with a still mind, we will discover an unexpected source of happiness within our own self. Meditation shows us that happiness is not dependent on outer circumstances, but on our inner attitude.
Concentration
Be it work, sport or music, concentration is essential to fulfill our potential. In one pointed concentration there is great power; our energy and focus do not get dissipated. When we have concentration we can do more in less time. Through meditation we gradually improve our powers of concentration; this focus can be used for both meditation, and also other activities we engage in.
Spontaneity and Creativity
When we live in the thinking mind, we are usually preoccupied with the past or future. When we spend our energy on the past and present we cover up our natural spontaneity and creativity. We may feel we have neither creativity or spontaneity, but, if we can learn to silence the mind, we realize that we have far more potential than we currently believe. To access this source of inspiration we just need to quieten the mind. Some of the great thinkers and scientists were able to make important discoveries when they could absorb themselves in their work, to the exclusion of all else. Meditation helps us to live in the current moment, and thus can help us to unlock our creative potential.
Discovering the Purpose of Life.
If you are satisfied with your current life. If you feel perfect contentment and happiness then, at the moment, meditation is not necessary. However, if you feel empty inside; if you aspire to know more about the nature of existence and life, then meditation can be of great help. Usually we look for meaning in life through external events and other people. Meditation, however, shows us that we can gain a greater understanding of life through knowing who we are. In meditation we gain a new perspective of life, uncolored by our own egoistic perspective.

For those who wish it, meditation can become a lifelong process of answering the eternal question: “Who am I?”
The benefits of meditation are real, but, it also requires perseverance. It is mistake to expect all these benefits in the first few attempts; the mind takes time to tame. Also, it is difficult to explain all the benefits of meditation, because it involves a state of consciousness that cannot be expressed by words. To appreciate the benefits of meditation it is essential to meditate yourself. Alas, it is not sufficient to just read about it. Start meditating today!

Just chill............agarbandhu

4 Powerful Reasons to Meditate and How to Get Started

2009-06-24T20:26:00.000-07:00

4 Powerful Reasons to Meditate and How to Get Started

Meditation is the art of silencing the mind. When the mind is silent, concentration is increased and we experience inner peace in the midst of worldly turmoil. This elusive inner peace is what attracts so many people to meditation and is a quality everyone can benefit from.
What are the Benefits of Meditation?
I’ve been meditating twice a day for the past 9 years because I enjoy it. It may seem strange, but I feel happiest when sitting in perfect silence. The experience is difficult to express in words. It is akin to the “peace that passed understanding”. It is also true that every meditation is not the same. Sometimes meditation is a struggle to control the mind, while at other times it feels effortless.
These are some of the benefits of meditation:
Improved concentration - A clear mind makes you more productive, especially in creative disciplines like writing.
Less bothered by little things - Do you sometimes allow yourself to get upset by little things? It is the nature of the mind to magnify small things into serious problems. Meditation helps us detach. We learn to live in the here and now, rather than worrying about the past or future. We do not worry about meaningless things, but see the bigger picture.
Better Health - There have been numerous studies pointing to the health benefits of meditation. The reason is that meditation reduces stress levels and alleviates anxiety. If we can reduce stress, many health benefits follow.
Knowledge of Self - Meditation enables us to have a deeper understanding of our inner self. Through meditation we can gain a better understanding of our life’s purpose.
Is Meditation Religious?
The great thing about meditation is that our philosophy/religious belief is not important. Meditation is about consciousness. The beliefs of the mind become trivial. We dive deep into the heart of the matter to gain access to our soul - our inner reality. Therefore, mediation can (and is) practiced by people of different religions or no religion.
But Idon’t have time to Meditate
Many people like the idea of meditation, but feel they don’t have enough time. When you really want to do something you can find time. Get up earlier or watch 30 minutes less TV. Meditation requires an investment of time, but clearing the mind makes the the rest of the day more productive. Nothing is better than the feeling of inner peace. What is the point in being tremendously busy but unable to enjoy it? Meditation is not about retreating from the world; it gives us inspiration. Whatever you do, if you have peace of mind, your work will be more enjoyable and productive.
How to Meditate
Like anything worthwhile, meditation requires practice. To get the most from meditation you need to do it every day. This requires a place and time where you will not be disturbed.
Sit with a straight back. Don’t try to meditate lying down because you are likely to fall asleep. Meditation brings relaxation and peace but at the same time this is a dynamic peace. Meditation is quite different than the relaxation of sleep. When we really meditate, we are fully alert and conscious. Our sense of awareness is heightened. Afterwards you’ll have a positive feeling for the world and a renewed sense of dynamism.
Don’t eat before meditating. After a heavy meal your body will be lethargic with digestion.
It is not necessary to mediate in the lotus posture. It is fine to meditate in a chair, as long as the back is straight.
It is helpful to take a shower before meditating.
Burning incense and having a candle are not necessary, but they can add a little extra inspiration.
It is good to meditate early in the morning. It is said the best time is 3am, although, I feel it is more important to be awake and not sleepy, I meditate at 6.30am.
One Pointed Concentration
However you learn to meditate, you must learn to concentrate on one thing at a time. Usually, the mind tries to hold several different thoughts and ideas at once. When you sit down to meditate for the first time, you realize how cluttered the mind is. Mediation teachers have described the mind as a “mad monkey”. However, the mind can be tamed and forced to concentrate on a single thought.
One helpful technique is concentrating on a candle flame. Narrow your gaze to the small tip and block out all other thoughts. When you get distracted, go back to focusing on the candle flame. You can also use other objects like a small dot or flower. The important thing is that you concentrate only on one thing at a time.
Mantra
Another way to learn concentration is through the use of mantra. A mantra is the repetition of a sacred word. For example, you might repeat the mantra AUM a certain number of times. Repeating a mantra forces the mind to focus on a single thought.
Silent Mind
After you’ve practiced concentration and learned to focus on one thing at a time, you can proceed to the next stage: no thought at all. Achieving a silent mind is difficult, but when to attain it the experience is powerful. A technique I advise is viewing your thoughts as separate from your self. When a thought appears, make a conscious decision to throw it out of your mind. Over time you realize that you are capable of allowing or rejecting thoughts. Your real “I” is not a collection of thoughts, but something far deeper. This is the most significant realization of meditation - that you do not have to be a slave to your thoughts.
Through meditation, you attain the power to control your thoughts, and on occasion stop them completely. Don’t be discouraged if you can’t attain a silent mind straightaway. It takes time and practice. There is nothing really else to it; meditation is a simple and spontaneous action. Unfortunately, our mind is used to complication and it takes time to unlearn bad habits.

Just chill.................agarbandhu

14 Ways to Procrastinate Productively

2009-06-24T20:20:00.000-07:00

14 Ways to Procrastinate Productively

For too long I’ve sat idly by while the good name of procrastination is dragged through the muck. For the sake of getting things done we’re advised to banish, kill, and avoid procrastination without any acknowledgment of the good it’s done.
We owe procrastination. Big time. It’s responsible for our best ideas and busiest hours. Used effectively, procrastination is a powerful motivator and source of inspiration.

Structured Procrastination
Productive procrastination falls into two categories, structured and unstructured. With structured procrastination you use the desire to avoid an important task as motivation to crank out dozens others. Anything to postpone what you really need to do, right?
Whenever I need to avoid something important, I turn to a few tasks that rarely get the attention they deserve.
Get Organized - There’s no better way to feel productive while avoiding the inevitable than organizing your home or work space. Without procrastination my desk would be perpetually cluttered and the dishes would never get done.
Network - Have a bunch of contacts you should really touch base with but don’t have the time? Procrastination is a great opportunity to politely reply to nonessential email. Taking the time to stay in touch with people pays dividends in the long-run.
Plan Ahead - The only thing better than actually doing something is thinking/talking about doing something. Take the time to identify, record, and schedule all your tasks, obviously leaving the most important for last.
Odds and Ends - Procrastination is the best time to find closure for everything that’s on your mind. Use it as an excuse to investigate and resolve issues that have been nagging you.
Meetings - If you’re not going to be productive, you might as well take other people down with you.
Errands - Need to schedule a dentist appointment? How about that oil change? Procrastination is capable of making the most tedious and trivial errands appealing.
Get Up To Date - Have a bunch of dull reports and memos you should probably read? They’re starting to look a lot more interesting.
Assist Others - If you’re not going to do your own work, you can at least deliver on the help you promised your colleague last week.

Unstructured Procrastination
Structured procrastination is a great way to keep busy, but sometimes that doesn’t cut it. When you’d rather not do anything work related, unstructured procrastination is the way to go. It might seem like laziness, but what’s wrong with that?
Unstructured procrastination is essential for recharging creative energy and allowing the unconscious mind to work on difficult problems. These are 6 productive ways to avoid work completely.
Go to Lunch - You need to eat, might as well do it now so you can’t use it as an excuse later.
Exercise - Same as lunch, with the added benefit of increased alertness.
Take a Walk - A casual walk is a great way to unburden your mind and allow great ideas to come to you.
Relax - If you feel a strong desire to procrastinate, there’s probably a reason behind it. Relaxation is important for a healthy productive lifestyle, why not do it now when you can’t get anything else done?
Come Up With a Great Idea - This one can’t exactly be completed on demand, but studies have shown that entrepreneurs and other creative people tend to get their best ideas during down time.
Read a Good Book - If you’d rather not think for yourself, you might as well absorb the great ideas someone else took the trouble to record.

Just chill.................agarbandhu

Stop Waiting and Choose Your Own Talent

2009-06-24T20:14:00.000-07:00

Stop Waiting and Choose Your Own Talent

Men often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, and then I acquire the ability to do it even if I didn’t have it in the beginning.-Gandhi

we are often held back by common misperceptions about the nature of talent and ability. We are taught that talent is a natural gift; that we have no more control over our talents than the color of our eyes. For many years I waited for my talent to manifest itself so I could reach my potential. Eventually I realized that waiting is useless, that talent is a choice not a gift, and that passion is stronger than any God given ability.
The primary source of confusion is equating talent with natural ability. By making this mistake we discourage ourselves from pursuing what we want. If we aren’t blessed with natural ability then trying seems pointless. But talent is much more than natural ability. Natural ability will get you in the door but not much further. For example, there are thousands of people with great athleticism, but there is only one Michael Jordan. Jordan became the best because he loved basketball to the point of obsession. The true source of his greatness is not natural ability but love.
Love is what motivates people to endure the hours of practice and countless failures that develop skill. Natural ability is insignificant compared to years of hard work and experience. If you really love something, don’t be discouraged by a lack of natural ability. Just work hard to improve, study your trade, learn from experience, and before long you’ll surpass those relying on natural ability alone.
The point I’m trying to make is that love, passion, desire, whatever you call it, is much more important to success than having a natural aptitude. We shouldn’t rely on our natural abilities to guide our lives. For a long time I expected my natural ability to expose itself and put me on the path to success. I assumed I’d come across it by accident and everything would fall into place. I guess I didn’t want to choose or didn’t know how to choose what I really wanted.
Long story short, this passive strategy didn’t work. If you wait for the world to find a place for you, you will be put in a group that really doesn’t fit. You lose your individuality. The truth is the world doesn’t care about finding your passion or reaching your potential. The world sees you as a means of production to be used as efficiently as possible. It is our personal responsibility to pursue our own happiness.
The beauty of it all is that the key to success and the key to happiness are one and the same. The same love that makes you want to dedicate your life to something also motivates you to practice and develop your skills. So stop waiting for your greatness to appear out of thin air. Decide what you really love and start pursuing it today. No one else is going to do it for you.

Just chill................agarbandhu

Designing Your Day

2009-06-24T02:14:00.001-07:00

Designing Your Day

Since you live your life one day at a time, it is a good practice to design your day such that it will be enjoyable and productive. You really do this the night before by making plans for the next day. Then you get up in the morning with a positive attitude, complete your tasks and celebrate your successes. Finally, you start the process all over for the next day.
Questions you may have include:
How do you start your day the night before?
What do you do the next day?
What are the final results of this method?
This lesson will answer those questions.
Start the night before
You start in designing your day the night before.
List goals
Make a list of three major goals you want to achieve tomorrow. If you have a task that will take more than one day, break it into smaller pieces and get a goal to achieve one or more of those pieces tomorrow.
Although you often see To-Do lists that can be a page long, we want you to only list three major items so that you can be sure of completing them. You can have a separate list of items to do, but these major achievements will make your day a success.
Listing these goals will put them in your subconscious mind, such that you will start to work on them while you sleep. You will also be anxious to get to them in the morning.
Give thanks
Then before you go to sleep, give thanks for the blessings you have had throughout the day and in your life.
Tomorrow
Get up in the morning with enthusiasm, achieve your three goals, and then celebrate the outcome.
Wake up
When you wake up in the morning, do so with enthusiasm. Tell yourself, "It is a great day to be alive!" Some people take a while to really wake up and get going, so you may have to adjust your enthusiasm until your "motor is running."
Achieve goals
Then work to achieve your three goals. You may do one at a time or jump from one to another. The main thing is that you finish these three before you move on the less important items.
Celebrate
After completing each goal, celebrate and congratulate and praise yourself for the job well-done. This is important, because it bolsters your confidence and feeling of self-worth, so you can be effective in future tasks. If someone else praises you for the good job you have done, that is like frosting on the cake.
Results
You will benefit from following this routine of designing your days in that you will be more effective and efficient. You will get more out of the day without the stress of having to multitask and have an endless list of things to do.
You also will give yourself some much-needed positive feedback, which will give you a stronger sense of self-confidence and esteem. You will feel like a champion each day.
Summary
It is a good practice to design your day, such that it will be enjoyable and productive. You start the night before by making plans for the next day. Then you get up in the morning with a positive attitude, complete your tasks and celebrate your successes. The result is that you will do more and have greater confidence and esteem.
Just chill................agarbandhu

Importance of Social Relations in Life

2009-06-24T02:11:00.001-07:00

Importance of Social Relations in Life

A major part of your life concerns your relationship and dealing with other people. Fulfillment in your social interactions can contribute to leading a satisfying and successful life. Factors involved in having satisfying relationships are that you should have respect for other people, seek to have everyone win, and enjoy others today.
Questions you may have include:
How can you respect everyone?
If others win, don't you lose?
What if you are too busy to enjoy others today?
This lesson will answer those questions.
Have respect for other people
Everyone deserves some respect. Don’t stereotype or categorize others, such that you automatically show disrespect. Also, don't be a cynic who puts everyone else down.
If you don't have respect for others, your attitude shows through in your relationships with that person. How can you get along with a person if you secretly think little of him or her? Disrespect can harm business dealings, as well as personal relationships.
Always, think well of a person, even if you disagree or dislike things he or she does. You will find that people ride to your expectations of them. And remember that the Bible said,"God created man in His own image."
Seek to have everyone win
In any dealings with another person, you should seek a solution in which you both win something. This is called a "win-win" situation, where you both reach a mutually beneficial transaction. Don't try to beat the other person into the ground and win everything. You won't have repeat business and will have few friends with that attitude.
The Golden Rule states that you should "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you." When you deal with other people, you should allow them to also win.
Enjoy others today
Live for today and enjoy the people around you while you can. Don't be waiting for someone else tomorrow. Like the old song says, "If you can't be with the one you love, then love the one you're with."
Don’t drag the past into the present or live a life based on an undefined future. Some people are always looking for something or someone better. That may not happen.
Summary
To have satisfying social relations, you should have respect for other people, seek to have everyone win, and enjoy others today instead of some other time.

Just chill..............agarbandhu

The Daily Ritual of Champions: a Philosophy of Life

2009-06-24T02:06:00.000-07:00

The Daily Ritual of Champions: a Philosophy of Life

To achieve your purpose and get the most out of your life, perform the following steps as a daily ritual:
-Count your blessings and be thankful for what you have
-Live your life as a Champion
-Enjoy the adventure of life and help others enjoy theirs
This lesson will explain those steps.
1. Be thankful
No matter what problems you have or how bad things may seem, there is always something to be thankful about. Don't dwell on the negative. Think of the good things you have, and the problems and challenges will soon diminish or even disappear.
Examples
People who have lost all their belongings in a natural disaster often will say, "At least we have our lives and none of us was seriously hurt." That is something for them to be thankful of, despite their material losses.
Then there is the story about the man who was unhappy because he didn't have any shoes. Then he saw a handicapped person with no feet. He realized how lucky he was.
You know whom to thank
Be thankful. And you know whom to thank every day, according to your beliefs.
2. Live as a Champion
This doesn't mean you must be the world champion. Instead, you are a person who acts and feels like one who can achieve anything. You may also champion a worthy cause to help other people.
In order to be a champion in anything you do, you must fulfill the five basic areas in life. We call them the 5 Powers of a Champion.
Be healthy
Take care of yourself. Strive to be physically, mentally and spiritually healthy. You feel good when you're healthy.
Be knowledgeable
Always seek to learn, so that you'll be skilled in what you want to do. You feel sure when you're knowledgeable.
Be excellent
Strive to achieve your goals, do a good job and have confidence and self-esteem. You walk tall, when you know you are worthy.
Be valuable
Seek to be important and valuable to others. This is the crux of good relationships, as well as business. Value in relationships includes listening and caring about the other person. A good friend is a valuable commodity.
People reciprocate your actions by providing something valuable to you.
Be honorable
Try to always be honest, courageous and reliable. try to be a person of good character. Others will respect you for your integrity.
3. Enjoy life and help others enjoy theirs
Seek to enjoy the adventure of life. Celebrate your achievements. Use your set-backs as challenges to overcome. If you are in a competition, congratulate the winner.
A major part of enjoying your life is to help others enjoy their lives. Help people succeed. That is what it is all about. That is your purpose.
Help to improve society and improve the world.
Summary
Follow this way of thinking every day to make yourself a Champion, as well as others.

Just chill.............agarbandhu

Importance of Good Attitudes in Life

2009-06-24T02:02:00.000-07:00

Importance of Good Attitudes in Life

A major part of your life concerns your attitudes toward yourself and others and how you feel as a result of those attitudes. Fulfillment in your attitudes can contribute to leading a satisfying and successful life. Factors involved in having satisfying attitudes are that you should enjoy life, be accountable for your own well being, and think in terms of taking care of your whole person.
Questions you may have include:
How can I enjoy life when I have all these problems?
Why should I be accountable when it is someone else's fault?
Why look at the whole person?
This lesson will answer those questions.
Enjoy life
You should live your life with joy. It is also true that the joy you feel is life. Your attitude toward what you wish and expect governs the response you get.
When things go bad, you can try to appreciate the blessings you have and what is good about your life. Have fun. It is not all that bad.
Having a positive outlook on what happens will help you realize the job in your life. It may be fun to complain or look to the dark side of things, but that also can only make you unhappy. Why not be happy? Also, when others feel your negative outlook, they tend to deal with you in a negative manner.
You should recognize that joy in life, and not the length of life, is the most important thing.
Be accountable
You are responsible for your own well being. You can't depend on other people to make you happy, satisfied, successful or such. You have to look out after yourself. As Rev. Robert H. Schuller often says, "If it’s going to be, it’s up to me."
Many people these days blame others for their own mistakes or problems. When you take responsibility, you gain self-respect. When you are accountable, you can then correct any problems, so you can move on.
Behaviors and choices contribute to your state of being. Emotional and spiritual responses to behaviors can lead to physical changes. We have the ability to choose both our behaviors and responses.
Work on the whole person
The part can’t be well unless the whole is well. You must remember that we are made up of body, mind, and spirit. We cannot separate these three parts. They all work together in whatever you do.
Your attitude toward everything you do must take into account the whole person. it is difficult to enjoy life, if your body or spirit is unhealthy. And you need to earn a living to get by in life. They are all part of the whole picture, and this must be part of your attitude toward life.
Summary
To have a satisfying life, you should have the attitudes that you enjoy life, are accountable for your own well being, and you think in terms of taking care of your whole person.

Just chill................agarbandhu

Continuously Increase Productivity by Embracing the Optimization Mentality

2009-06-24T01:57:00.000-07:00

Continuously Increase Productivity by Embracing the Optimization Mentality

The Difference between Experts and Drop Outs

This chart I found at Creating Passionate Users illustrates the development curve of experts, amateurs, and drop outs. An important detail to note is that the line for all three groups starts at the exact same point. Everyone starts as an absolute beginner with no ability. The drop outs never get anywhere because they give up at the first sign of adversity. The amateurs achieve a degree of success but become complacent and stop improving. The experts are the only group to reach the top tier because they continuously improve.
Experts aren’t more productive because they’re more talented or because they work harder. The difference between the experts and everyone else is the optimization mentality: constantly striving for improvement. Although the mentality is mind numbingly simple, only a small proportion of people actually live by it. Why is this case? I perceive the cause is a common misconception about the nature of success.
The Gradual Nature of Success
When we think about success and look at the achievements of successful people, all we can see is the superficial layer. We see the successful business, the best selling novel, or the artistic masterpiece. Naturally, we assume that success requires a similar achievement and we’re discouraged because, as beginners, we’re incapable of reaching such heights. This is when most people start thinking in terms of “can’t”. If we could see successful people as beginners and understand every tiny effort that gradually contributed to their success, we wouldn’t be discouraged by our own initial ignorance. Instead of seeing the path to success as a gargantuan wall, we’d see it as a very long but climbable staircase.
Unlike a system with rules and procedures, the optimization mentality is a philosophy that can be applied to anything. The toughest part is thinking independently and motivating you to take action. These 4 ways of thinking all contribute to the optimization mentality.
Keep an open mind - It’s impossible to improve when you aren’t looking for opportunities. Don’t stunt your own growth by believing you’ve already reached the top of the ladder. There is always some small way to get better. Keep your eyes and ears open so you don’t miss it, and seriously consider even the strangest sounding ideas.
Stimulate your mind - We get better as we get smarter. Be curious. Experiment with different options until you find the best. Watch what other people are doing, preferably smart people. Read books and articles on a wide variety of topics. Follow up on the ideas that pop into your head at 3 a.m.
Seek advice from superiors - For every aspect of your life, chances are you know at least one person who is a little bit better in that area. Ask your friend in finance how to invest. Ask your engineer brother-in-law what computer to buy. Leveraging the knowledge of others is the fastest way to improve.
Never be satisfied - Don’t settle for mediocrity. We should be grateful for our good fortune, but we shouldn’t stop trying to get better. Once we become satisfied we start stagnating. The world is constantly moving. If you aren’t moving with it you’re falling behind.
I already know what the trolls are going to say, “Everything in this article is completely obvious.” No kidding. There is a big difference between understanding a concept on an intellectual level and taking it to heart. The optimization mentality is easy to grasp, but comprehending it’s importance and implementing it on a day to day basis isn’t. If it was there wouldn’t be so many people wondering what went wrong.
Embracing the optimization mentality is something everyone should strive for. Every productive action is driven by the goal of continuous improvement. That’s why this post is my contribution to the Ultimate Productivity Guide.

Just chill.................agarbandhu

Competency Based Interviews - 6 Steps to Success!

2009-06-22T03:30:00.000-07:00

Competency Based Interviews - 6 Steps to Success!

Competency based interviews are intended to get the best from you, the candidate, whilst also fulfilling the needs of the organisation to get the very best person for the job. There are some easy steps to make the most of yourself and have a much better chance of success.
1. Prepare well, but keep it sensible As long as you know the job you are going for, ask for details of what you will be measured against. Ask for a set of competencies. Ask for a job description. This sets you up to succeed, not just because you are better informed, but also because you have asked - which will impress the decision-makers, before you even get there!
2. Get CreativeHere is the time to use your own experiences to create 'stories' which you can use in the actual interview. These 'stories' are real scenarios that you have been a part of, which over a period of days and weeks beforehand, you write up. Maybe you will have 20+ initial ideas.
3. Leverage!Take the very best scenarios and write them out, bullet points first. Then flesh them out, whilst referring carefully to the competencies you've been given. It is amazing how you can 'tune-in' your scenario to include many, if not all of the competencies. And if you can't fit them all in, there will be a use for them - later!
4. PracticeBy reading through your scenarios (and by now you should not have more than six or seven) you will familiarise yourself with the contents, so well, that they will become second nature - even in the scary experience of an interview.
5. In the InterviewThere are some tactics in here too!
o Using your scenarios make just three key points about what you've been asked. Make them relevant and the right 'weight'. Not too long or too short.
o After that, leave space for them to ask more - that's what they are listening for.
o Say 'I' a lot - they want to know what your personal involvement and experience was, not 'the team' or 'they'.
o Have fun - whilst not contrived, smile and make some simple jokes, if you feel comfortable with that - they want to employ happy as well as capable people.
o Can't answer? That's fine. Make sure that you reflect on your shortcomings by saying things like, 'It's one of the first things I want to develop in my next job - if you did your stuff on your scenarios and your competencies well enough, you will have covered 90% of the bases well and you'll be forgiven for not being 'perfect'. If you are really stumped - say so!
o Ask questions - relevant, about their culture, focus on developing you, opportunities - the positive 'people' things (remember it's your chance to see if you want to work with them!).
o Also ask about current issues they may be facing - you did do your homework on them, didn't you?
6. Strong Ending!Keep the whole thing light, even as you leave at the end. Have a conversation in general terms - about anything! Do make sure that you ask them some things that are about them - they will love it if you ask them some open (what, how, when, where, who) general questions about your new job! About something nice in the building or their clothes - take as it comes and do what feels comfortable!
Remember that competencies are there to help you and they provide a guide-map for your competency based interview success!

Just chill.................agarbandhu

The Secret to Creativity

2009-06-22T03:16:00.000-07:00

The Secret to Creativity

The secret to creativity is to knows how to hide your sources. -Einstein

The biggest misconception about creativity is that it involves a moment of magical creation when the incredible appears out of thin air. The truth is less romantic. Everything comes from somewhere. All ideas have been thought before and all artists, especially the most brilliant, have their sources of inspiration. I’m going to break Einstein’s famous rule by revealing some of my sources and explaining how I use the genius of others to further my own ambitions.

Everyone starts somewhere so I might as well come clean from the beginning. Before I started this weblog on Blogger.com my creative credentials were nonexistent. I had no tangible experience as a writer, designer, marketer, or entrepreneur. Aside from this site I still don’t. All I can say for myself is that I read voraciously and draw fairly well. You’d think a chump like me wouldn’t stand a chance in the hyper competitive online world.
So how did I end up with this fine looking site, a readership that’s growing every day, and over 100 original articles, several of which have been featured on the likes of Lifehacker.com, Problogger.net, lifehack.org and all the major social sites?
By observing how others became creatively successful and combining their genius with my own.
I’ve been obsessed with creating a profitable website based on my own original writing. It wasn’t sombodys monetary success that inspired me, it was his literary style. The wit, the humor, the brutal honesty, and the fact that people were eating it up and begging for more made me believe that I could do it too; that I could build a business around my passion.
From my friends I learned the value of lengthy original articles, serving the reader, writing from personal experience, and choosing topics that apply to everyone. More than through his words, I’ve learned from observation; from the locations of his ads, the frequency of his posts, and a thousand other details the casual reader would never notice.
Sure, I could have ignored everything that worked for other blogger, but what would be the point of that? Too many people try to reinvent the wheel when a Ferrari’s roaring past. During the Renaissance apprentice artists learned by replicating the works of the masters. The secret to being creative is recognizing the genius of others and re-purposing it for your own ends.
If you want be more creative, you have to learn from people who are smarter than you are. Unless you can find a mentor this means learning from observation. When you see a piece of work you admire, dissect it scientifically and discover exactly what makes it great.
Is it the tone of an article? The subject matter? The author’s personality? Its usefulness? The same concept applies to design. What creates that feeling of visual pleasure? What made you click that ad? What made you subscribe? The clues to creativity are everywhere. You need to gather them and apply that understanding to your own creative work.
It’s also important to find models that fit your profile. If you’re a nobody like me, don’t try to build the next Tec Crunch. It won’t work because you don’t have Mike Arrington’s insider connections. Think of yourself as an engine in need of a body. You can find one that fits by investigating people with a background and style similar to yours.
It’s important to note that collecting inspiration is distinctly different than plagiarism. Although my friends work has influenced mine I haven’t done something unique about the contents. I’ve taken the model and adjusted it to my own needs, the same way my friend probably followed the examples of other successful people when building his site.
I need to give an extra special thanks to Dr. Krishnan for helping me designing my creative thoughts. When I started this site I didn’t know any CSS or HTML. Like any beginner I downloaded the best free theme I could find. Over time I’ve continuously built on it, doing at least 3 major overhauls and making small changes on a daily basis. The key to making a good design if you have no experience is looking at other sites, finding what works, and blending it into a unique creation.
All art is imitation. The most creative people imitate rarer, more brilliant sources and cover their tracks. That’s why reading nothing but blogs makes you write dull generic posts. If you absorb a mediocre style, your output will be mediocre. If you scour the classics for the most intelligent, passionate writing in existence your own inspiration will follow. Pay close attention and you’ll even notice the passing of ideas through history.
There’s a reason great artists are always clustered together, both geographically and chronologically. Interacting with creative individuals makes you more creative. Rival artists exchange techniques and competition increases effort. The present is the ideal age for creative people. The internet has connected everything, allowing us to draw inspiration from classic works of art and our finest contemporaries without leaving the couch.
It’s also important to draw from a wide array of sources. Your best option is to play the statistics. Creativity isn’t a spark it’s a boiling pot. Sample an enormous amount of creative work and you’ll produce an inspirational concoction. The most important creative asset is curiosity.
Genuine creativity doesn’t exist, particularly in a cosmic sense. Living beings don’t create life; they re-purpose existing matter into offspring. Nothing has been created since the Big Bang. All we can do is rearrange the stuff we find around us. If you want to be more creative, stop waiting for inspiration and start experimenting. Creativity isn’t creation at all, its reorganization.

Just chill.................agarbandhu

Balancing the Future and the Present

2009-06-22T03:08:00.000-07:00

Balancing the Future and the Present

Consider some of the choices that impact our lives on a daily basis:
Do I stay up late hanging out with friends, or go to sleep and be productive tomorrow?
Do I eat out because it’s easy, or cook at home and save money?
Should I work late and get ahead, or enjoy the beautiful spring weather?
Each of these choices boils down to a simple question. Do I want to enjoy the present moment or plan for the future?
These are all difficult decisions because both answers have their merits. The present moment is fleeting and immediate, while the future is constantly hanging overhead. Part of us is constantly begging for indulgence while another part is worried that we’re falling behind and won’t be able to recover.

Satisfying both sides requires balance.
It’s tempting to simplify our lives by choosing an extreme and applying it to every decision. How many people live from pleasure to pleasure trying to “live life to the fullest”, only to realize 10 years later that they’ve wasted all their time and money and have nothing to show for it? On the other hand, who envies the miser who’d rather save a few dollars than enjoy the company of friends and family? Foolish extravagance and cold hearted stinginess both make miserable people.
Making Conscious Decisions
Finding balance is the art of living. It can’t be taught, but we can develop it within ourselves as we gain wisdom and experience. The first step is consciously examining everyday decisions. We’re so absorbed by routine that we continue doing things without thinking about them. Fortunately, when a bad decision pushes us off balance we can tell because it makes us unhappy.
Next time you feel a part of your routine isn’t the right decision, ask yourself a few questions:
Why did I start doing this? Does it satisfy a present urge or provide for the future?
Does it still fulfill the same desire it did when I started doing it? Does the benefit still outweigh the cost?
If not, what else should I be doing?
A simple review often provides the best answer. We already know the truth, but we’re blinded by routine. Taking a serious look at our behavior makes bad decisions hard to ignore. Asking these questions regularly helps us refine our behavior and every tiny increment of progress takes us closer to the elusive Golden Mean.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

The Shy Person’s Guide to Talking to Strangers

2009-06-22T02:08:00.001-07:00

The Shy Person’s Guide to Talking to Strangers

One of the easiest ways to improve your networking ability and invigorate your social life is to develop the skill of talking to strangers.
We’re trained as children to fear strangers (which are good for safety reasons) but most people carry this fear into adulthood where it does more harm than good. It becomes a constraint on the number of people you can meet and interact with. You get stuck in a box, only open to creating new relationships through people you already know.
If you already know a lot of people, this can work all right, but it limits you to meeting people who are generally like you. If you are new to an area and don’t have many friends, the fear of talking to strangers is absolutely crippling.
Fortunately, developing the skill of talking to strangers is easy. Once you get started the immense benefits and excitement it brings will encourage you to keep going.
It comes down to three things:
Understanding the benefits of talking to strangers.
Knowing how to deal with the occasional rejection or unpleasant encounter.
Breaking down your fear through practice.
Everyone is a Learning Experience
To get an idea of the benefits of talking to strangers, you need to change your mentality. As tribal creatures, we’re naturally inclined to fear, nay hate, people we don’t know. We instinctually perceive them as dangerous outsiders, seeking to pillage our village and make off with our women and children!
In modern society this simply isn’t true. Most people are friendly and perfectly open to conversing with you. It just takes a little effort to cross the stranger barrier. Each person is an incredible learning opportunity. What they tell you about themselves. How they live and interact with the world. There is a wealth information waiting to be tapped.
Strangers also tell you a tremendous amount about yourself by the way they react to you. As you gain experience and learn to read body language, these reactions are essential to developing your social skills. Of course, there are also the priceless relationships you’ll have the chance to form:
Business contacts - Who you know (and what they think of you) is often more important than what is on your resume.
Friendships
Mentors and teachers
Romantic relationships
I think the last point is extremely important. We all dream of meeting our ideal mate, but when we see someone we’re extremely attracted to, we’re usually too intimidated to approach them. How can you expect to find love with that mentality?
Dealing with Rudeness and Rejection
Now that you’re sold on the benefits of talking to strangers, the only other skill you’ll need is the ability to let rejection roll off your back. The key to this is not taking it personally.
At least 95% of the time when a person reacts negatively to you it has absolutely nothing to do with you personally. Most likely they’re having a bad day or you caught them at the wrong moment. Maybe they’ve been harassed by people before and assume you have bad intentions. Or maybe they’re just not that cool and you wouldn’t gain much from knowing them anyways.
Instead of reliving the incident in your mind and dwelling on your insecurities, imagine reasons for their behavior that don’t depend on you. In the 5% of cases where you actually caused the negative reaction, treat it as a learning experience. The problem isn’t you, it’s your behavior, so examine what you could have done better. Did you come off pushy? Could your personal appearance be better? Thinking about these things will go a long way towards improving yourself.
How to Get Started
That hardest part of talking to strangers is getting started. Before you have experience striking up conversations it can make you nervous and awkward, but the more you do it the smoother and more likeable you’ll become.
Start Small - If you’re a naturally reserved person, you’ll probably want to warm up a bit. Start with making eye contact with people you might like to talk to, smiling at them, or saying Hi out of the blue. Think of possible conversation starters you could say.
Comment on Something - If you see something remarkable, make a comment. Even if it’s not at anyone directly, chances are people will hear and react to you. If you see someone doing or wearing something interesting, tell them what you think. Keep it positive and most likely they will be happy to chat.
Make a Joke - If a decent joke pops into your head, just come out and say it. If someone laughs, that’s the perfect conversation starter. This is great for opening dialogue with attractive people of the opposite sex.
That’s really all there is to it. Good luck and don’t get discouraged. You have nothing to lose but your shyness!

Just chill................agarbandhu

Can you sacrifice temporary pleasure for long term goals?

2009-06-22T02:04:00.001-07:00

Can you sacrifice temporary pleasure for long term goals?

We know what we need to do to reach our goals. But we still aren’t doing it. We’re checking our email 50 times a day. We’re browsing the web without any particular purpose. We’re watching TV or a movie or playing video games or chatting with friends. We’re doing any of the dozens of things we do to avoid constructive effort.
We do this because these activities are more enjoyable than work. They’re easy and there is no risk of failure. You don’t have to perform when surfing the web. You just enjoy the ride. Who knows, maybe you’ll even learn something valuable.
But probably not.
These activities are intentional time wasters; things we do to make the day go faster. Because working is a pain. Who ever knows if it will pay off? There is so much uncertainty. If we aren’t going about it the right way all our work will be wasted anyways.
It’s easy to make excuses for why it doesn’t matter. It’s easy to waste time, to succumb to temptation. As I write this, I have constant urges to check my email, to open up Google Reader, or check out today’s traffic stats.
Nothing really constructive comes from these activities, but they’re easier than trying to coherently express my thoughts. They’re things that I rely on, things that I do when I don’t want to work.
Wasting time is addictive. The more you do it, the more excuses you make so you can keep doing it.
I’ve been thinking a lot recently about how I spend my time and what it takes to succeed. As I analyze my actions, I realize that I’m constantly making decisions that hinder my success. We become so habituated to wasting time, to passing the day, that we forget that it’s a conscious choice.
But realizing this also makes me optimistic. Recognizing a weakness is the first step to eliminating it. It makes me understand, every time I’m tempted by one of my favorite time wasters, that I’m only hurting myself. And suddenly that temptation isn’t as strong as it was before.
The skill I need to master is the ability to delay gratification. This means resisting short term pleasures in favor of a long term goal. If you can’t resist short term pleasures, you won’t do the work that needs to get done.
It isn’t easy. Most of us are stuck in bad habits that we don’t even recognize. You need to think about what you really want. Are you willing to sacrifice your biggest dreams for temporary satisfaction?
I’m not.From this point forward I’ll be making a concerted effort to delay gratification and work towards long term goals. It will be less comfortable, but knowing that I’m doing everything I can to succeed will easily outweigh the sacrifice

Just chill.............agarbandhu

Increase Personal Productivity with the Top 11 Multiple Positives

2009-06-22T02:01:00.000-07:00

Increase Personal Productivity with the Top 11 Multiple Positives

Multiple positives — activities that benefit you in multiple ways — are a powerful productivity tool. These activities maximize your time by combining necessities like education, exercise, money making, and fun into a single, super productive action. The more multiple positives you use, the easier it is to get everything you want done without feeling stressed. They also free up loads of time and create a pleasant feeling of satisfaction and efficiency.

Finding your personal multiple positives can be challenging. Nothing works for everyone, so it’s important to figure out what’s compatible with your lifestyle and continuously optimize. Based on the feedback from my post about return on investment, personal experience, and hours of research, here are the top 11 multiple positives that productive people use to make the most of their time. I hope you find something inspiring, I know I have.
Enjoyable and Educational Exercise
We start finding reasons not to exercise when it becomes a tedious chore. Making exercise a pleasant experience encourages us to use our bodies more often and satisfies our recreational desires. Here are some examples of how to make exercise a multiple positive.
Take it Outside - Getting out of that musty gym and enjoying the great outdoors creates a completely different experience. Instead of counting seconds on the treadmill, walk, run, or bike around your neighborhood. If you’re ambitious you can even head to a local park for some interesting scenery. Try gardening and yard work for the extra benefit of getting things done around the house.
Make it Social - Exercise can also be quality time with friends and family. Instead of making the gym a lonesome affair, find a partner. Having someone to socialize with makes the time pass faster and gives you a chance to develop personal relationships. After dinner walks let you get some fresh air, work out your legs, and have a conversation. Another good example is coaching youth sports which also contribute to the community.
Make it a Game - Nothing makes the time fly by like friendly competition. My personal favorite is pickup basketball, but any sport could be an example. Tennis, golf, fishing, or even a casual game of Frisbee can make exercise less work and more play.
Get Smarter - A great way to add still another positive is making exercise educational. Listening to books on tape or pod casts while walking, running, or using the treadmill, takes your mind off the work while your learn about a subject you’d never be able to squeeze in otherwise.

Just chill.............agarbandhu

Why is Time Management Important - Insights for Everyone

2009-06-21T20:59:00.000-07:00

Why is Time Management Important - Insights for Everyone

Why is time management important? In simple terms, time is more valuable than money (hence the fact that we are able to trade money for time), it takes time to preserve our health, without enough time we cannot enjoy meaningful relationships and time cannot be retrieved once it passes into our past - regardless or whether it is lost, stolen or simply wasted.
Every day - and often every hour of every day - we are bombarded with opportunities that we must either accept or reject. A ringing telephone, a new email, an invitation for lunch, an advertisement enticing us into a store and many more. To be effective in achieving our life goals it is essential that we learn how to prioritize tasks so that we know when it is appropriate to allow some distractions and interruptions, and when we have to take more responsibility to stay on track.
No one wants to be a slave to urgent and unimportant tasks - or even urgent important tasks. Learning the answer to the question, "Why is time management important?" helps to make us free.

Time management is a particularly important skill in the technology filled world for two reasons. First, because of the labor saving devices we have at our disposal - washing machines, telephones and cars just to name a few - we have more time available to us than in times past. Second, because of technology we also have more overlap between what used to be a strict divide between work and personal time, social and family time and other activities. Mobile phones, pagers, fax machines and the internet are particularly responsible for these changes.

Also, the prevalence of advertising and the pervasiveness of modern day marketing make us susceptible to being distracted at almost any time of the day or night when we might be trying to concentrate on an important task at hand.

Different aspects of our lives require our time in some or another form. We have social lives, family lives, healthy pursuits, recreational and relaxation time, sleep, work, community activities, shopping and chores and emergencies.

Time management is important because it is the tool by which we make and defend our life choices. The simple fact of life is that almost anything that would be important for us to do will take a significant amount of our time. Say you wanted to learn a new language or attend a distant family reunion. These would be important activities that we wouldn't want to neglect for the sheer fact that something urgent but not as important comes along (it is not illegal to refuse to answer a ringing telephone).

If we are learning a new language we need time to learn to read, write and speak. To master vocabulary and grammar and conversation and to practice and to have long conversations with other who are fluent in the language.

Time is also important for us to use between activities as a buffer to help us recharge, celebrate our achievements, plan and prepare. It is essential that we rest our bodies to avoid injury, sickness and fatigue. And it is important that we have enough time in reserve for emergencies and for catching up on things that we have to put off because of the unexpected nature of many of life's activities.

Getting enough rest and taking regular breaks from our activities also enables us to be more productive in the time that we do spend working, playing and serving others.Unless can appreciate why time management is important and become good time managers we can never hope to be able to do our best at anything.

So, why is time management important?

It is the only element that we can actually control in our lives sufficiently to achieve our goals at work, home, sports, school or in the social arena. And we only have a limited amount of it. It cannot be saved, bought, sold or mortgaged. Time is an invaluable commodity that we must protect and nurture actively and take responsibility to invest wisely for the future. We only have one life to live. Time management can make it worth living.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

How Do You Start Your Day

2009-06-21T20:19:00.000-07:00

How Do You Start Your Day
"Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces up, snow is exhilarating; there is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather." --John Ruskin

As I mentioned in the introduction (which you should read if you haven’t already) lasting change is only realized when we work on both how we think and how we act. Many programs fail because they tackle only thought or only action. Often we try to compartmentalize and change just one area of our life. We might focus on communication or cholesterol or calories or cardio. However the areas of our life do not operate in a vacuum. Sure, we can maintain a compartmentalized change for a few weeks, months, or even years — but ultimately we must change the other components of our life to create lasting change.
For this reason, you will see that the CYCL works back and forth between practical action steps and practical steps to change how we think. Today we will take a simple step toward changing our thought patterns. This very simple assignment can work wonders in your life.

Imagine this scene with me:
Your alarm goes off and you struggle to get out of bed on time as the electronic beeping pierces your eardrum. Your first thought is “When is daylight savings?” How you would love the extra hour. With the realization that it just occurred a month ago, you stumble to your feet and head toward the shower. After showering and dressing you go downstairs to find your family at the breakfast table.

"Good morning," you say as enthusiastically as possible for 6:00 AM. You are greeted with a few moments of silence, then a half-hearted “hello” before everyone returns to his or her breakfast bowls and conversation. You grab or request your assistant for a cup of coffee or Tea and a muffin to have on your way to work. While driving to work your cell phone rings. It is your best friend from college. After a cursory hello she breaks into an auctioneer ramble. "I'm really in a jam. My servant at home called and she is sick. Can you watch my kids tonight for thirty minutes while I run and pick up my best friend's present?"
Always there for one another, you tell her you would be happy to watch your friend before hanging up the phone. You get to work and find someone in your designated parking place. Frustrated, your “okay mood” is drastically deteriorating. You park near the back of the lot only to step into a wad of gum as you get out of the car.

You shuffle into the office, passing the receptionist. Normally she welcomes you with a cheerful greeting, but today she is busy taking notes while talking on the phone and doesn't offer so much as a nod. You sigh again and trod to the meeting room.
Have you imagined this scene? Any idea what is missing?

Two simple words: GOOD MORNING (backed by sincerity and enthusiasm).
The first thirty to sixty minutes of our day set the tone for the hours to come. Getting off to a cheerful start has a dramatic impact on how our day will flow.
Your Assignment
Let today be the last day that you have not said "good morning" to yourself and the last day that you begin your life on “auto-pilot.” Tomorrow when you awake, don't jump into a crazy-pace and forget the crucial step of giving yourself a "morning hello." Before you even get out of bed, take a few deep breaths and say "Good morning." Run through your positive qualities. Say a quick prayer. Focus on your day ahead and imagine moving through it effortlessly. Research has shown that those who visualize their day beforehand have a much better success ratio than those who do not. Look in the mirror and smile. While showering, think of five things you are grateful for. While getting dressed, develop curiosity about the day. Try saying, “I know something wonderful will happen today … I can’t wait to see what it is.”
Try to spend at least three minutes each morning doing positive-thought activities. It might be awkward at first, but stick with it. Likewise, remember that you have a great impact on everyone around you — especially in the morning. Breakfast is considered a vital physical component of getting our day off to a good start. Likewise, a positive morning routine is vital to getting our day off to a positive emotional start.
There is an interesting phenomenon that you will likely notice when recollecting your life or examining the lives of others with whom you are close. If we think the day is going to be “not so good,” we will likely be right. If we think the day will “be great,” we will likely be right. Our thoughts about what is to come act like a magnet — thus the cliché “What we think about, we bring about.”

Take a moment to reflect on your morning thought patterns.

Can you detect a correlation between your thoughts and what is happening in your life right now?
This program is about change — changing our external environment, aligning our life with our priorities, and creating internal change to support the external. Feeling good about ourselves is a necessity for implementing any lasting change. When something makes us feel good we are much more likely to stick with it — that is why it's so important to focus not just on your external surroundings — but on your internal approach as well.

Just chill....................agarbandhu

Focus Better by Listening to Music

2009-06-21T20:15:00.000-07:00

Focus Better by Listening to Music

I know this idea isn’t ground breaking, but it’s a technique that I know to work from personal experience. Since I discovered it two years ago, I’ve used music to get through boring work or focus creatively almost everyday. I’ve found that it can make even the dullest jobs enjoyable and help clear mental blocks to creativity.
I first noticed the beneficial effects of music while playing video games. It was a few days after Deepawali in 2005 and I was playing Halo 2 online. I had bought a brand new Ipod, so I decided to listen to music through the headphones while I played. After a few minutes I noticed a distinct change in my style of play. I was playing more naturally. Rather than hesitating, I made decisions based on instinct. The music relaxed me, and to a certain extent distracted me from the game, allowing my subconscious talent to come through. The music also helped me block out the outside world. With those headphones on I was like a machine, moving from one task to the next without unnecessary thought or action.
Pascal said that we enjoy music because it causes us to count without our knowing it. I believe this is also what causes music to increase focus and creativity. Even if we aren’t paying close attention, our brain counts each note and change of rhythm. This counting occupies the part of the mind that hinders our creative abilities. Like a soothing lullaby, music puts the worrisome unfocused part of the mind to sleep so the productive side can get to work.
Music can also have a profound effect on mood. If I’m in a bad mood at work I’ll put on some Bob Marley and get down to business. It always takes my mind off what I’m doing and makes me a happier person. The same is true for classic rock. One summer I worked a terrible job manually assembling bottle openers and renovating an old barn. Without a radio playing classic rock in the background I would have hated life. It depends on your particular tastes, but listening to music with soothing rhythms and a positive message helps you forget your work and think happy thoughts.
For focusing on a creative task, I’ve found that listening to music without lyrics is most effective. There are no words to abruptly grab your attention and instrumental music tends to have the most compelling melody and composition. The dashing enthusiasm of Mozart or Beethoven enhances the speed and agility of creative thought.
When I’m writing I always have my Ipod handy. If I have trouble concentrating because of outside distractions or my own scatterbrain, I put on some classical music. This relaxes my mind, blocks outside noise, and helps organize my thoughts. Mozart works very well, and I’ve heard this is because his rhythms resonate with human brain waves. Whether this is true or not, classical music is a great tool for increasing concentration and productivity.The results you see will depend heavily on your personal tastes. Experiment with the types of music you listen to during certain tasks. Through trial and error you’ll eventually discover your optimal soundtrack. I’m always looking for new concentration aids, so I’d love to know what type of music or other technique works best for you. It might not seem like a big deal, but listening to music can change your state of mind, causing changes in mood and productivity. Using music as a tool is an easy thing anyone can do to make themselves smarter and happier.

Just chill..................agarbandhu

Six Ways to Jump-Start Your Day

2009-06-21T20:11:00.000-07:00

Six Ways to Jump-Start Your Day

I’ve been guilty of standing in my own way of increasing my productivity. Every morning, my clock went off at 05 AM. However, instead of hopping out of bed and attacking the day, I would reach over and smack the snooze button and say to myself, “Ten more minutes.” Thirty minutes later, I was scrambling out of bed, cursing at myself for not getting up on time and hustling to get out of the house. I was usually rushed and wound up eating my breakfast behind the wheel of my car.
Then I thought if I would just get up on time, I would have the time to shower, shave, eat a healthy breakfast, and still have time to do some morning reading, writing, or reviewing my next action lists for the day.

So I started looking at how others were successful in getting up on time. Here’s my list:
Use a light producing alarm clock – I purchased an alarm clock that begins to flash a pulsating light in the room 4 minutes prior to the set time. I find that I’m usually waking up before the audible alarm rings.
Put the alarm clock on the other side of the room – Make it so that you have to get up to turn it off.
Start the days with protein – What people like me believe and advocates that the intake of protein helps to jump start the body in the morning. It is argued in favour that a quick protein drink, a short exercise period, then a breakfast helps you start your day the way you like it to be.
Turn up the lights – A Harvard study concluded that there is a link between light exposure and the part of the brain that is thought to control attention focus and energy production. So, turn on the lights…all of them: Bedroom light, bathroom light, hall light, kitchen light, and living room light.
Get at least five minutes of physical activity – My choice is jumping rope. Gets the blood flowing. Jump starts (pun intended) the metabolism.
Eat a healthy low-fat, high-fiber breakfast – Fiber One is a great choice as it has the highest fiber content of any other cereal.
Use the comment section below to share your ways of jump-starting your day.

Just chill...................agarbandhu

Attitude makes the difference

2009-06-19T20:48:00.000-07:00

Attitude makes the difference

Ramakrishna was born with congenital cataract. By the age of 22, he was totally blind. Today he is General Manager with the Industrial Development Bank of India. He credits his mathematical ability and technology as the two most important pillars of his success.We will let his words do the talking and reflect on his journey to success.

Ramakrishna says:
I often question myself, did I really succeed? If so what is the success formula?

What is that I would like to share with those who want to succeed?

Well, I believe success is a journey, not a destination.

I invented a secret recipe of success, which unlike the three or so routine courses of meal, has eight courses to taste and dwell on.

These are: vision, Dream, focus, direction, mind Tuning, Toughness, perseverance and struggle.

Now collect the capitalized letters of these eight steps and reshuffle them to form the mantra of my success ‘ATTITUDE’.
My vision right from childhood was to be different from others and not to be run-of-the-mill. I have always been doing different things or things differently, as the famous motivator Shiv Khera would have said.
During the gradual deterioration of my physical vision between the age of 12 and 20 years, a very close friend of mine gave me the dream, that is, I should be the first M.B.A. among the visually impaired.
Success is the sweetest form of revenge: to further my vision and fulfill my dream I realised that I needed to have a strong focus like Ekalavya. Throughout my journey towards the completion of M.B.A., many onlookers discouraged and in fact made a joke of my dream. I learnt that the best way to succeed was to quietly sweat out and let the results speak for themselves. My success glared back at them.
National Association of the Blind, India helped me to get back to the school where I earlier studied by convincing the school staff about inclusive education. Also the available support in terms of readers and scribes, gave me the orientation and the direction I needed.
I internalized that the mind is all-powerful. It processes the sensory data, information and graphic inputs to produce a response or an output. I focused on the process and not necessarily on inputs and output. This helped me in mind tuning and made me very strong in mathematics and installed in me a perception of graphics and contours. Even today my memory is highly graphic oriented and this has helped me tremendously in quantitative subjects and has also developed the skill of effective communication.
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going: It doesn't matter how well you played, what matters is, did you win? In the success journey, one has to be tough to face all eventualities, to accept failure as a stepping stone for success, to have the courage for mid-course correction and to learn from everyone, even children. I consciously worked on being tough.
Ordinary efforts won't bring extraordinary results: A strong vision, passionate dream, undeterred focus, well laid-out direction, mind tuning to think differently and being tough to take on challenges taught me perseverance. Nothing comes free in the world. It is only in the dictionary that ’success’ comes before ’struggle’ or ’achievement’ comes before ’work’. We are all social animals and subject to the combined influences of everyone around us. This means you will not have things your way all the time. You need to be patient and should never shy away from relentless efforts.
All the above helped me struggle and helped me survive till I reached the touchline. What matters are results and the efforts should be well directed with focus. I may be the first M.B.A. among the visually impaired person, may be a career-efficient senior officer of Industrial Development Bank of India Limited, may enjoy reputation in the cultural field, may be involved with number of social welfare organisations in sharing my vision and perspective, and may be a successful teacher, sharing knowledge in the areas of finance, project management, risk management, etc. But the question remains have I succeeded? My conviction is I am on the way to success but yet to succeed.
On this journey in search of excellence, I have learnt:
1. Never to compromise with injustice: fight for your rightful share by perseverance and not by aggression;
2. Never to be a party, even unwittingly, to any act of injustice;
3. It is discipline, integrity, hard work, perseverance and self-trust, which will bring success;
4. To agree with people profusely and to disagree modestly and
5. To have a very big dream, to be passionate and to not doubt the dream.

JUst chill..................agarbandhu

Commit Yourself to Action by Investing in Success

2009-06-19T20:41:00.000-07:00

Commit Yourself to Action by Investing in Success

Getting motivated is a challenge, and it often takes more than good intentions to really get going. When we first come up with an idea, our heads are filled with scattered thoughts and a vague plan of action. The problem is that good ideas don’t go anywhere on their own. Without a tangible force behind us nothing happens.

Do you work harder when faced with a deadline? We all do because we have no choice but to produce.
So how do we force ourselves into action? A great way is stepping up and putting some hard earned cash on the line. Investing money in a goal does two things. First, it provides you with a valuable resource towards reaching your goal. Second, it gives you something to lose. If you don’t do anything at this point you’re wasting your own money.
I was first exposed to this idea in a post by Violent Acres that explains why the poor have a higher rate of obesity than the rich. V points out that poor people don’t lack the willpower to get in shape, they lack the resources. Only the rich can afford personal trainers, expensive gym memberships, and high priced groceries. With all these resources available it’s hard not to stay in shape.
At first I disagreed. Why can’t someone get a great workout for free by running outside and doing pushups and sit-ups at home? In theory this works, but practice is different. Say you decide not to buy the gym membership and resolve to work out at home. Excuses always turn up. One day the weather is bad so you don’t run. The next day you come home tired, turn on the TV and never get up. Without a monetary investment to lose, there isn’t pressure to perform. By investing in a gym membership, you’re not just buying a place to workout, you’re buying motivation.
In effect, you become your own employer. When someone is hired, an employer pays for office space, a computer, training, etc. If that person doesn’t produce, the employer loses money. That’s why he also pays a supervisor to ensure the employee works hard. If you decide pay a consultant or personal trainer, you hire you own supervisor. By investing money in your goals you become employer and employee. You have something to lose if it fails and everything to gain if it works. It’s harder to be lazy when it means wasting your own money.

Any savvy entrepreneur will tell you that it takes money to make money. If you aren’t willing to spend a nominal sum to further your cause then how committed is you? By all means be frugal, but look at the big picture. Free resources are great but you can’t rely on them alone. What is the worth of a Rs. 100 book that helps you make thousands in the long run? Spending on valuable assets that grow your business is the sign of a wise investor.

We’re only human. We have good intentions, but our willpower can fail us. Over time we wear down and need an extra push.

Don’t let the fear of wasting money prevent you from investing in your goals. If you know you want something, invest in it financially and mentally. Give yourself a resource and a reason to push you.

Don’t be afraid to make a mistake. One great investment can make up for scores mediocre ones. With hard work you’ll make back the money you spend, but you’ll never be able to get back lost time.

Just chill................agarbandhu

10 Ways to Instantly Build Self Confidence

2009-06-19T20:32:00.000-07:00

10 Ways to Instantly Build Self Confidence

Build Self Confidence
1. Dress Sharp

Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don’t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and shaving frequently, wearing clean clothes, and being cognizant of the latest styles.
This doesn’t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes. Buying less also helps reduce the clutter in your closet.
2. Walk Faster

One of the easiest ways to tell how a person feels about herself is to examine her walk. Is it slow? tired? painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.

3. Good Posture

Similarly, the way a person carries herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They aren’t enthusiastic about what they’re doing and they don’t consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You’ll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.
4. Personal Commercial

One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech. Unfortunately, opportunities to listen to a great speaker are few and far between. You can fill this need by creating a personal commercial. Write a 30-60 second speech that highlights your strengths and goals. Then recite it in front of the mirror aloud (or inside your head if you prefer) whenever you need a confidence boost.
5. Gratitude

When you focus too much on what you want, the mind creates reasons why you can’t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum. You’ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success.
6. Compliment other people

When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you’ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.
7. Sit in the front row

While in schools, offices, and public assemblies around the world, people constantly strive to sit at the back of the room. Most people prefer the back because they’re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.
8. Speak up

During group discussions many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. This fear isn’t really justified. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.
9. Work out

Along the same lines as personal appearance, physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physical appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive. Having the discipline to work out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.
10. Focus on contribution

Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus too much on ourselves and not enough on the needs of other people. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you’re making to the rest of the world, you won’t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase self confidence and allow you to contribute with maximum efficiency.

The more you contribute to the world the more you’ll be rewarded with personal success and recognition.

Just chill....................agarbandhu

How We Really Learn

2009-06-19T20:19:00.000-07:00

How We Really Learn

Do you think we learn from mistakes?
We don’t.
Not when we’re told we’re making a mistake.
Not when we know we’re making a mistake.
Not even when the mistakes we’re making negatively affect our lives. (Just ask smokers about that one.)

Only the smartest people learn from mistakes, and only geniuses learn from the mistakes of others. The rest of us learn from pain. We don’t realize drinking too much is a bad idea until we wake up the next day with a throbbing headache. And once the pain goes away we forget and make the same mistake again.
Decisions aren’t made rationally (as much as we’d like to believe that), they’re made with emotion. Afterwards we use reason to make ourselves feel better. Sadly, knowing what’s right doesn’t equate with doing it.
So how do we learn?
Pain. But pain isn’t enough. We need the fear of pain to scare us straight. Pain alone is bearable. It’s certain, finite, manageable. Fear of an unknown pain, of an unbearable future is the real motivator.
I asked the most positive and productive individual I know what keeps him motivated.
“I’m afraid of wasting my life,” he said. “Afraid of growing old and seeing myself as a missed opportunity, as someone who could have been what they wanted, but didn’t want it enough.”
Life is now, and it’s all real. This moment has no second chances.
What makes a great teacher? Teaching is one of the most complicated jobs todayIt demands broad knowledge of subject matter, curriculum and standards; enthusiasm, a caring attitude and a love of learning; knowledge of discipline and classroom management techniques; and a desire to make a difference in the lives of young people. With all these qualities required, it's no wonder that it's hard to find great teachers.

Here are some characteristics of great teachers:

Great teachers set high expectations for all students.

Signs of a Poor TeacherThese are the warning signs that there may be a problem with your child's teacher:Your child complains that his teacher singles him out repetitively with negative remarks.

The teacher is the last one to arrive in the morning and the first to leave in the afternoon. He doesn't return phone calls or respond to written communication. Your child rarely brings work home from school. Homework assignments are not returned.

The teacher does not send home frequent reports or communications to parents. The teacher exhibits limited knowledge of the subject he is teaching. Lessons lack organization and planning. The teacher refuses to accept any input from parents.They expect that all students can and will achieve in their classroom, and they don't give up on underachievers.

Great teachers have clear, written-out objectives. Effective teachers have lesson plans that give students a clear idea of what they will be learning, what the assignments are and what the grading policy is. Assignments have learning goals and give students ample opportunity to practice new skills. The teacher is consistent in grading and returns work in a timely manner.

Great teachers are prepared and organized.They are in their classrooms early and ready to teach. They present lessons in a clear and structured way. Their classrooms are organized in such a way as to minimize distractions.

Great teachers engage students and get them to look at issues in a variety of ways.Effective teachers use facts as a starting point, not an end point; they ask "why" questions, look at all sides and encourage students to predict what will happen next. They ask questions frequently to make sure students are following along. They try to engage the whole class, and they don't allow a few students to dominate the class. They keep students motivated with varied, lively approaches.

Great teachers form strong relationships with their students and show that they care about them as people.

Great teachers are warm, accessible, enthusiastic and caring. Teachers with these qualities are known to stay after school and make themselves available to students and parents who need them. They are involved in school-wide committees and activities, and they demonstrate a commitment to the school.

Great teachers are masters of their subject matter.They exhibit expertise in the subjects they are teaching and spend time continuing to gain new knowledge in their field. They present material in an enthusiastic manner and instill a hunger in their students to learn more on their own.

Great teachers communicate frequently with parents.They reach parents through conferences and frequent written reports home. They don't hesitate to pick up the telephone to call a parent if they are concerned about a student.

Do you feel to add something more to this perspective, please go ahead….just make a comment and the next moment you will find it in place.

Just chill...........................agarbandhu

Good teaching qualities: inducing interest and positive expectations

2009-06-19T20:14:00.000-07:00

Good teaching qualities: inducing interest and positive expectations

By contrast, if teachers give up on their students and adopt a negative attitude, the students will sense it and tune out
Here I am writing about two important attributes of a good teacher:
The ability to induce interest in students and
The power of positive expectations.

For students to become self-motivated learners, a fervent interest for the subject has to be sparked among them. Teachers can generate interest by sharing purpose and vision and adopting teaching methods based on experience.
Sharu S. Rangnekar, a leading management teacher and consultant, told me how his teacher induced in him an interest for Sanskrit:
In the first period he taught us, we were 40 boys ready to listen. The first sentence he said was, “Boys! You are lucky.”
We asked him in chorus, “Why?”
“Do you know what you are going to learn?” he asked.
“Sanskrit,” we replied.
“What is Sanskrit?” he asked.
Most of us replied, “A language.” One student said, “A scoring subject (in our time there were only three subjects in which one could score 90% or more: mathematics, science and Sanskrit).”
“You are all wrong,” he said. “Sanskrit is not just a language or a scoring subject. It is a key to 3,000 years of culture. With this one key the whole treasury is yours.”
Not everybody believed him—but 10-12 of us did. After matriculation, Sanskrit was of no use to me in chemical engineering or MBA—but I still read Sanskrit. It is a virus that cannot be removed.
When my Sanskrit teacher retired after 35 years of service, I visited him. He started as a Sanskrit teacher and ended as a Sanskrit teacher; did not become even a vice-principal!
“What did you achieve in your life?” I asked him.
“Sanskrit is becoming a dead language; but I got every year a batch of 40 students. I tried to infect them (with interest for Sanskrit)—I know I could not infect everybody, perhaps 10-12 in each batch. After these 35 years, there are 400 former students of mine who must be still reading Sanskrit—this is my achievement.”
A good teacher also has positive expectations of each student, that each can learn and be a winner.
The research on the impact of expectations was done in the 1960s by Robert Rosenthal of Harvard University and Lenore Jacobson of South San Francisco Unified School District. They showed that when a teacher has positive expectations of a student, the student’s performance improves.
They conducted a test among students of an elementary class at a San Francisco school. Then after some days the researchers went to the teachers of the class and explained to them that they were to be part of an experiment. The teachers were told that based on the scores of a pretest, the “Harvard Test of Inflected Acquisition”, they had identified 20% of students in the class who were special and from whom great intellectual growth was expected. The teachers were asked to keep the information confidential. Although the researchers randomly selected the names of students with no exceptional intelligence, the teachers were led to believe that the selected 20% had great potential. The teachers developed positive expectations of the students.

All the students were tested again after eight months. The results showed significant intellectual growth among the designated 20% compared with the rest. The teachers believed that the 20% were better than the rest, and this had a strong influence on their body language and attitude towards these students.
Effective teachers have this attitude towards every student in the class and keep encouraging and motivating them. By contrast, if teachers give up on their students and adopt a negative attitude, the students will sense it and tune out. As a student I have seen some teachers who exhibited prejudices against students based on their social background, which in turn alienated them from the learning process.
Many of our educational institutions unfortunately are not giving enough attention to work on the competencies of the faculty. If our education system is not delivering at different levels, incompetent faculty is primarily the reason For some years now, there have been attempts to use technology to counter the shortage of good faculty by linking large number of students to a teacher in a far-off location via satellite.
I believe such short cuts can’t be a substitute to the emotional connects between students and teachers that can happen only in a classroom. One of the toughest challenges for our country is to cultivate good faculty. For this the systems and processes in our institutes needs to be revamped. I will write about that in my next Blog-post.

Just chill......................agarbandhu

How to Write Something worth Reading

2009-06-19T20:11:00.000-07:00

How to Write Something worth Reading

90% of writing published online isn’t worth the server space it’s stored on. This is due to lack of purpose and underdeveloped style. Many writers fail to take themselves seriously. Perhaps they underestimate the validity of their ideas or the power of the medium.
Effective writing can be learned by practice and observation. The purpose of this article is to encourage the creation of forceful, passionate writing, the sort of writing people love to read.
1. You write what you read.
Stop reading the same meaningless, repetitive writing everyone else reads. Quality of output directly correlates to quality of input. I’ve noticed the technical quality of my writing and the originality of my ideas sharply decline when I fall into the habit of reading nothing but Blogs.
Absorb fresh ideas and sublime style by reading old books, written by masters of language. Then take these ideas and pretend you invented them. You’ll be hailed as a prophet.
The subject matter of the books you read is secondary. The value comes from unconsciously absorbing the style of the author. This is how we learn to write rhythmic sentences and clearly convey meaning. You will also find unexpected inspiration.
2. Avoid balanced views.
When forming an opinion, it is necessary to consider the strengths and weaknesses of alternatives and select the most correct. Many writers use the same method when making an argument.
Unfortunately, this reasonable process makes for weak writing. If you wish to influence readers mentally and emotionally, do not concede the slightest degree of doubt. Overwhelm them with the strength of your conviction.
3. Style is king.
The hearts and minds of readers are won, not by judicious argument, but by force of personality. You aren’t selling an idea alone. You’re selling the authority of the mind that endorses it. Don’t believe for a moment that being in the right outweighs charismatic personality.
4. Unleash your noble scorn.
Prose writing is most effective when used to expose injustice and unravel misconceptions. Channel your anger and frustration into passionate writing.
5. Passion
Passion is the one quality essential to powerful writing. Writing without passion is a sailboat without wind. Whatever you write about, there must be a passion that drives you. The passion that lights your mind on fire and compels you to expose your private thoughts to the world.
Writing with passion leaps off the page. But this sort of writing is rare because we’re afraid of our inspiration. We’re afraid to express ourselves too forcefully, to overstep the bounds of our authority and risk being wrong.
To produce great writing, you must recognize these doubts as the byproduct of innovation. The only writing that matters is writing that challenges popular opinion, writing that changes minds. If you aren’t pushing limits, you aren’t going far enough.
Embrace your passion and share it with your readers. You may offend some, and you may be proven wrong, but unless you take that chance you’ll never make an impression.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

How to Build Self-Discipline

2009-06-18T23:29:00.000-07:00

How to Build Self-Discipline

Discipline is freedom. You may disagree with this statement, and if you do you are certainly not alone. For many people discipline is a dirty word that is equated with the absence of freedom. In fact the opposite is true. As Stephen R. Covey once wrote, “the undisciplined are slaves to moods, appetites and passions”. And in the longer term, the undisciplined lack the freedom that comes with possessing particular skills and abilities - e.g. to play a musical instrument or speak a foreign language.
Self-discipline involves acting according to what you think instead of how you feel in the moment. Often it involves sacrificing the pleasure and thrill of the moment for what matters most in life. Therefore it is self-discipline that drives you to:
Work on an idea or project after the initial rush of enthusiasm has faded away
Go to the gym when all you want to do is lie on the couch and watch TV
Wake early to work on yourself
Say “no” when tempted to break your diet
Only check your email a few of times per day at particular times.

In the past self-discipline has been a weakness of mine, and as a result today I find myself lacking the ability to do a number of things which I would like - e.g. to play the guitar. But I have improved, and I can say that it is self-discipline that got me out of bed this morning at 5am to run and then write this article. Believe me, I would love to be curled up in bed right now, but this desire is subordinated by my inner sense of purpose.
If you struggle with self-discipline, the good news is that it can be developed. For example, it is only in the past two years that I have trained myself to wake early.

The following are what I have found to be the five traits of self-discipline:
1. Self-Knowledge
Discipline means behaving according to what you have decided is best, regardless of how you feel in the moment. Therefore the first trait of discipline is self-knowledge. You need to decide what behavior best reflects your goals and values. This process requires introspection and self-analysis, and is most effective when tied to written expression. I highly recommend taking the time to write out your goals, dreams and ambitions. Even better, write out a personal mission statement. I found that writing such a statement gave me a greater understanding of who I am, what I am about and what I value.
2. Conscious Awareness
Self-discipline depends upon conscious awareness as to both what you are doing and what you are not doing. Think about it. If you aren’t aware your behavior is undisciplined, how will you know to act otherwise?
As you begin to build self-discipline, you may catch yourself being in the act of being undisciplined - e.g. biting your nails, avoiding the gym, eating a piece of cake or checking your email constantly. Developing self-discipline takes time, and the key here is you are aware of your undisciplined behavior. With time this awareness will come earlier, meaning rather than catching yourself in the act of being undisciplined you will have awareness before you act in this way. This gives you the opportunity to make a decision that is in better alignment with your goals and values.
3. Commitment to Self-Discipline
It is not enough to simply write out your goals and values. You must make an internal commitment to them. Otherwise when your alarm clock goes off at 5am you will see no harm in hitting the snooze button for “just another 5 minutes….” Or, when initial rush of enthusiasm has faded away from a project you will struggle to see it through to completion.
If you struggle with commitment, start by making a conscious decision to follow through on what you say you’re going to do - both when you said you would do it and how you said you would do it. Then, I highly recommend putting in place a system to track these commitments. As the saying goes, “What gets measured gets improved”.
4. Courage
Did you notice the sweat dripping from the man in the picture at the start of this article? Make no mistake, self-discipline is often extremely difficult. Moods, appetites and passions can be powerful forces to go against. Therefore self-discipline is highly dependent on courage. Don’t pretend something is easy for you to do when it is in fact very difficult and/ or painful. Instead, find the courage to face this pain and difficulty. As you begin to accumulate small private victories, your self-confidence will grow and the courage that underpins self-discipline will come more naturally.
5. Internal Coaching
Self-talk is often harmful, but it can also be extremely beneficial if you have control of it. When you find yourself being tested, I suggest you talk to yourself, encourage yourself and reassure yourself. After all, it is self-talk that has the ability to remind you of your goals, call up courage, reinforce your commitment and keep you conscious of the task at hand. When I find my discipline being tested, I always recall the following quote: “The price of discipline is always less than the pain of regret”. Burn this quote into your memory, and recall in whenever you find yourself being tested. It may change your life.

Just chill................agarbandhu

How Meditation Improves Your Health

2009-06-18T23:18:00.000-07:00

How Meditation Improves Your Health

Meditation promotes good health by fighting off the adverse effects of stress - but what is stress anyway?
Stress is the response to a situation that motivates us to perform an action – whether that be fleeing from an attacker, worrying, or just mowing the lawn.
How Your Body Reacts to Stress.
If you become stressed (even mildly) your Sympathetic Nervous System works to cause you to act appropriately. Hormones like adrenaline and others kick in; we get excited or anxious; muscles tighten; blood pressure, heart rate, and breathing rate rises. We use up more energy. This is the “Fight or Flight Response”.
Whether it be a small event or a life-threatening one, our bodies respond to stress in a similar way. The difference is that the level of response adjusts to meet the perceived level of threat.
This system can get out of whack and people may find they are overreacting to some of the smaller stressors of life.Are You Uptight?
You may be a lot more wound up than you need be. For example: doing something simple like mowing the lawn shouldn’t be all that stressful. But if you were to stop mid-task and take a minute to ask yourself ‘what is my mental state right now?’, you may find you are more stressed-out than you realize. This could be because the mower wouldn’t start immediately, or because you’re dwelling on job-related pressures, or because you are habitually high-strung.
Whatever the case, if you are stressed, you are over-stimulating your body’s sympathetic nervous system.
You Are A Bundle of Nerves
Your body is geared up to react to the signals it receives from the mind. Simply put, when you experience ‘negative’ emotions (fear, irritation, anger, stress, bitterness, etc.) your mind interprets this simply as ‘There is danger here; it is not time to relax. All hell could break loose at any minute, better stay ready for action.’
The human body is wired up to react to danger very quickly. At the first sign of ‘danger’ (which could just be slow traffic driving you nuts) the hypothalamus sends off a myriad of signals which prepare us to respond to the perceived threat. When the hypothalamus sends out these distress signals, our bodies redirect energy from other less immediately vital areas to the functions that are specifically needed to respond to the stress.
Why Stress is Bad for Your Body
When your mind and body are in ‘fight or flight’ mode, your immune system suffers because the body is redirecting energy reserves that the immune system needs to other areas of the body. Therefore the more ‘stressed’ you are at any given moment - the less work your immune system is doing to get rid of all the nastiness that are in your system.
When you are highly agitated, the immune system pretty much packs up shop and has a siesta while all the drama unfolds elsewhere. Same goes for your digestive system, which is why you may lose your appetite when stressed.
Hormones also have a starring role in this picture. Adrenaline, noradrenalin and thyroxin are amongst the many hormones that get released into the system to perform their role in the ‘fight-or-flight’ scenario. These hormones have specific jobs, such as speeding up the heart rate, or raising body temperature, or swelling a fresh wound.
While this is all natural and necessary, problems arise when we don’t know how to switch off these responses. The body remains on stand-by for trouble, due to negative patterns of thought (worrying about the future, anger, dwelling on the past, etc.), or even just because we are so busy in general. This means the immune system isn’t getting enough time to do its job - so healing does not take place, or if it does, it is at a reduced rate of efficiency.
Unless you meditate, you typically never give the parasympathetic nervous system a go, but rather you settle into a pattern of swinging between a state of high arousal and one of habitual, low-level tension. Even when you go to bed, your dreams may be full of the day’s stress, and your body is so busy playing catch-up that you never quite get to a more desirable state of balance.
What is the Relaxation Response?
The basic theory behind the effectiveness of meditation is that it helps to take the mind (and thus the body) out of the stressed, ‘fight-or-flight’ mode that humans tend to get stuck in, and into the mode known as the Relaxation Response.
This was recognized by Dr Herbert Benson, a professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School, in 1967, who reportedly sneaked a number of practitioners of meditation into the laboratory to measure what was happening to them biologically when they were meditating.
Benson measured their vital statistics and found that the mediators were using less oxygen, lowering their heart rates, and generating more Theta brainwaves, which are associated with the relaxed state of sleep, or in this case the mental stage just prior to sleep. Dr Benson coined the term the Relaxation Response in his book of the same name and began a process whereby western empirical science began to understand the biological implications of meditation.

Just chill...............agarbandhu

Does Your Brain Need An Oil Change?

2009-06-18T22:42:00.000-07:00

Does Your Brain Need An Oil Change?

You probably own a car. Perhaps even a motorbike. One thing is for certain though: if you are reading this you are the proud owner of a brain.
Why is it that we care about how to keep our cars in top shape (oil changes, tire pressure, frequent cleaning…) more than about ensuring our brains - the physical basis for our minds - performs at their peak?
A spate of recent news coverage on brain fitness and “brain training” has missed an important constituency: younger people. Recent advancements in brain science have as tremendous implications for teenagers and adults of all ages as they do for seniors.
In a recent research by a neuroscientist Yaakov Stern of Columbia University, he related how surprised he was when, years ago, a reporter from Seventeen magazines requested an interview. The reporter told Dr. Stern that he wanted to write an article to motivate kids to stay in school and not to drop out, in order to start building their Cognitive Reserve early and age more gracefully.
What is the Cognitive Reserve?
Research since the 90s shows that individuals who lead mentally stimulating lives, through their education, their jobs, and also their hobbies, build a “Cognitive Reserve” in their brains. Stimulating the brain can literally generate new neurons and strengthen their connections which results in better brain performance and in having a lower risk of developing Alzheimer’s symptoms.
As astounding as these insights may be, most Americans still devote more time to changing the oil, taking a car to a mechanic, or washing it, than thinking about how to maintain, if not improve, their brain performance. Not enough young and middle-aged people are benefiting from this emerging research, since it has been perceived as something “for seniors.” Granted, there are still many unknowns in the world of brain fitness and cognitive training. We need more research, better assessments and tools. But, this does not mean we cannot start caring for our brains today.
Inheritance has surprisingly little influence on longevity. James Vaupel, of the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research, in Rostock, Germany, notes that only 6 per cent of how long you’ll live, compared with the average, is explained by your parents’ longevity; by contrast, up to 90 per cent of how tall you are, compared with the average, is explained by your parents’ height. Even genetically identical twins vary widely in life span: the typical gap is more than fifteen years.
This is why brain maintenance is too important: to make sure our brains last as long as the rest of our bodies.
What can we do to maintain our brain? Focus on four pillars of brain health: ensure frequent physical exercise, eat a balanced diet, learn effective stress management techniques, and get a constant flow of brain exercise. Stress management is important since stress has been shown to actually kill neurons and reduce the rate of creation of new ones. Brain exercises range from low-tech (i.e. meditation, mastering new complex skills…) to high-tech (i.e. using the growing number of brain games).
Let me offer some more specific guidance:
1. Physical Exercise
Physical exercise has been shown to enhance brain physiology in animals and, more recently, in humans. Exercise improves learning through increased blood supply and growth hormones.
If you can only do one thing, focus on cardiovascular training—exercise that gets your heart beating faster, like walking, running, skiing, swimming, biking, hiking, tennis, basketball, playing tag, and ultimate Frisbee.
2. Balanced Diet
As a general guideline, what is good for your body is also good for your brain. Eat a variety of foods of different colors while avoiding foods with added ingredients or processed foods. It is worth noting that few supplements have shown long-term benefits on memory and other cognitive functions.
Also, try adding some cold-water fish to your diet (tuna, salmon, mackerel, halibut, sardines, and herring) which contain omega-3 fatty acids. If you can only focus on one change, eat more vegetables, particularly leafy green ones.
3. Stress Management
Since chronic stress reduces and can even inhibit the creation of new neurons, stress management is important. Practice meditation, yoga, or other calming activities as a way to take a relaxing time-out. If you want a more high-tech option, use biofeedback devices that measure heart rate variability and allow you to see your levels of stress in real-time. If you can only do one thing, set aside 5-10 minutes to just breathe deeply and recharge.
4. Brain Exercise
Mental exercise can accelerate the rate that new neurons are created and enhance the chances of their survival. It also strengthens the synapses or connections among neurons, thus improving overall cognitive functioning.
The 3 key principles for good brain exercise are:
Novelty: you need to try new things, including things you aren’t good at.
Variety: given that the brain is composed of a variety of functionally distinct areas, you need to ensure a complete mental “workout circuit” to maintain sharpness in all areas. Excessive specialization is not the best strategy for our long-term Brain Health.
Challenge: you need to be exposed to increasing levels of challenge, so the task is never too easy.If you can only do one thing, learn something new every day, no matter how small.
I know, this is starting to sound like those lists we all know are good for us but we actually don’t do. Let me make it easier to start: every time you devote time to car maintenance chores, simply ask yourself, “What have I done lately to maintain my brain?”This article was written by Alvaro Fernandez, the Co-Founder of SharpBrains.com, a leading Brain Fitness blog and consulting company. Alvaro is a nationally-recognized Speaker on the latest applications of neuroscience research

Just chill..................agarbandhu

4 Ways To Make Life Lighter

2009-06-18T03:10:00.000-07:00

4 Ways To Make Life Lighter

At times, we all have things going on in our minds. There can be the little worries of having to go to the shop because there’s no food in the cupboards, to the big worries like being severely in debt or having a family member in hospital.
The “problem” with worrying is that it can have serious implications on our physical and mental health. People who have previously been in top shape can let one problem get to them so badly that they start having panic attacks or have their problems incessantly on their mind.
I should know, I’ve had times in my life where I have let my problems literally take over my thought patterns and consume me at all times. Yet, with the four simple steps today, it’s actually fairly simple to literally eliminate unnecessary worrying from your life.
After this, I also believe that life will start to feel a lot lighter, as if a heavy burden has been lifted from your shoulders.
1. Consider the Worst Possible Outcome
A few years ago one of my friends confided in me that he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to continue playing for the school football team that we were on. At the next training session when he didn’t show up, the coach asked me what was wrong, and I told him that my friend might have lost his passion and I wasn’t sure if he would be back.
A couple of days later my friend came back to me and said how he really wanted to start playing again, and had merely been going through a rough time when he told me what he did. I instantly remembered how I had told the coach my friend might not want to play anymore, and started worrying about the possible outcome.
Thoughts ran through my head such as “Would the coach pick him for the next game?”, “Would the coach tell him what I said?”, “Would he be dropped from the team?” and so on. I let this situation really get to me and the possible outcomes really consumed my thoughts.
About a week later I built up the courage to tell the coach I might have been wrong about my friend and the coach gave me a very nonchalant reply “Oh it’s fine, I had forgotten about it anyway”. Instead of worrying for a week, I could have looked at the worst possible outcome - probably that the coach would tell my friend and I would have to explain things - and then just taken action.
The worst that could have happened is rarely that bad when we really look at things, so I advise you to do this with all of the things you are worrying about. Look at the worst possible outcome, and then work to improve on that as best you can.
2. Keep Yourself Busy
The reason that we love Television so much is that it literally absorbs us into what is going on. When we are watching the black box we forget about everything else for a while and are totally consumed in the flashing images on screen.
It is for this amount of time that our worries and problems disappear, even if at the time we aren’t aware of it. It is only when we have the time to think and worry about something that it actually becomes a problem.
If, on the other hand, you can keep yourself busy doing something like studying, cleaning or just socializing then you limit the time you have to let your problems consume you. After all, something is only a problem when you think about it.
3. Realize You Can Get Through Anything
I firmly believe that it is completely up to us how we deal and react with every single situation in life. And, for that reason, I believe it is possible to see the positive in everything and enjoy almost all aspects of life. That being said though, it is much easier said than done, and there are definitely hard times which we have all faced in life.
Have you struggled? Is there something that has happened in your life that was really terrible? If so, then realize you got through it in one piece. How do I know? Because you’re sitting in front of a computer screen and able to spend your time reading an article like this.
No matter what challenges you have came across in your life, you have been able to get through them. Because of that, you will be able to do exactly the same again with whatever you are worrying about now or anything that faces you in the future.
4. Put Things into Perspective
Just like looking at the worst possible outcome can force us to realize our worries really aren’t that bad, so can the art of putting things into perspective.
Unless something threatens your health or the health of those around you, then it is not that big of a problem. Debt, a break-up or even losing a material item is really nothing compared to the possibility of death or something really serious.
I remember the story of one man in a poor area of America who really wanted to become a music producer. He spent as much of his spare time as he could make music and honing his talents. Yet, his parents wanted something different. They wanted him to become a lawyer or a doctor purely for financial reasons, despite the fact that he had no interest in either.
They pushed him so hard and so often that one day he ended up committing suicide, leaving a note of how he wished they would have supported him. Put things into perspective.
Thanks to the four steps above, and living in the moment as often as possible, I have practically eliminated all worries and problems from my life. If you follow these steps and put them into action, you’ll find that it is perfectly possible for you to do the same.
I would love to hear your feedback and additions in the comments below!

Just chill......................agarbandhu

For Real Self-Improvement, You Need To Invest In Yourself

2009-06-18T03:07:00.000-07:00

For Real Self-Improvement, You Need To Invest In Yourself

One great question to ask if you’re interested in self-improvement is “Am I investing in myself?” – Particularly when you’re feeling stuck, or when your progress towards your goals hasn’t been as fast as you’d like.
So what does “investing in you” mean? This depends on what your goals are, but these are three big areas you might want to invest some time, money and thought in:• Your appearance• Your skills• Your health
All of these are important for success in many walks of life. Here’s why, and some ideas how you can invest in each.
Investing In Your Appearance
This might seem a very shallow thing to put at the top. Unfortunately, like it or not, we all tend to judge on appearances. In some jobs or roles, looking the part can make a real difference to how others perceive and treat you.
Just as importantly, your appearance can have huge effects on your self confidence. Have you ever been at an event where you misjudged the formality and ended up very under-dressed or over-dressed? I’ll bet you felt awkward and out of place. Conversely, you might well have taken extra care over your grooming before a big presentation, and felt more confident as a result.
Investing in your appearance might mean:• Saving up for a good suit• Getting up ten minutes earlier to have time to look your best for work• Asking a fashionable friend for advice on your usual “look”• Losing some weight (also important for health reasons)• Taking some time to revamp your wardrobe, ensuring you have clothes that mix and match well
Investing in Your Skills
All of us have a certain skill set, often based on our jobs (current and past), our hobbies and our day-to-day experiences. Employers tend to be interested primarily in skills – what you can do. Some of these will be very specific to particular jobs (technical skills, such as being able to program a computer) and other skills are “transferable skills” that you can use in many careers as well as in day-to-day life (such as public speaking or presentational skills).
Clear five or ten uninterrupted minutes when you can sit down and list your skills. Put down little things as well as big ones – being able to bake the perfect cake is a skill!
What skills could you develop, with the investment of a little time or money? Could any of this form the basis of a new career, a side business, a fulfilling hobby, or something you could offer to your community?
Some ways to invest in your skills are:• Read a book that teaches you something new in a particular area• Attend a local course• Take part in an online course• Ask someone to mentor you• Schedule regular time to practice
Investing in Your Health
Too many of us are storing up health problems for later life – one that could cause financial problems or give us a huge reduction in quality of life. It’s much cheaper to focus on staying healthy than to take preventative action once something’s gone wrong. If you’re in good health, you’ll perform better at work, you’ll have more energy to work towards your goals, and you’ll generally feel happier!
Don’t just think about your physical health, either; mental health is just as important (and, indeed, your mental and physical health can’t be considered in complete isolation). By investing some time and money now, you could save yourself a huge amount of both in the future. Here are some ideas to get you started:• If you’re over or under weight, start taking action• Get some exercise each day – great for your body and mind• Take good care of your teeth (dental hygiene, and regular visits to your dentist) – tooth pain can be crippling• If you work at a computer, learn about RSI and how to prevent it.• Eat a healthy, balanced diet, focusing on fruits, veggies, wholegrain and lean proteins.• Don’t smoke, take drugs, or drink excessive amounts of alcohol.
What areas could you invest in? Is it worth spending some money or some time now in order to improve your position in the future?

Just chill................agarbandhu

Overcoming a Loss of Motivation

2009-06-18T03:02:00.000-07:00

Overcoming a Loss of Motivation

How many times have you started a new activity (such as a personal project or exercise routine) with a burst of enthusiasm, only to see that initial momentum evaporate? This often leads to depression and causes us to give up prematurely. I’ve experienced this letdown dozens of times myself. But fortunately, with a bit of thought and reflection you can turn this negative emotion around.
The key to harnessing your emotions understands them. The natural pattern of human emotion is peaks and valleys. When we start a new project we’re filled with tremendous optimism. All we can think about is the expected benefits, and since we haven’t started yet, we aren’t aware of the difficulties involved. This natural high causes a surge of mental and physical activity. The peak is a great thing because the energy boost gets projects off the ground. If you’re a creative type like me, you know that this period is euphoric. You feel like nothing can stop you.
The downside of this surge of energy is that it inevitably ends. Exerting large amounts of energy wears you down, and after the initial optimism wears off we feel extremely tired. However high you started off, you fall down just as low. This causes a loss of confidence. The combination of fatigue, scant results, and an awareness of impending adversity makes us want to give up. From personal experience I’ve learned a few ways to hold strong against negativity.
Be Prepared for a Letdown
Emotions, by nature, lose their power when we understand them. Prove this to yourself. Next time you get angry; take a moment to reflect on the reason behind the emotion. When I step back and reflect, it’s easy to see that my anger is caused by insecurity/selfishness/jealousy etc. After I understand the cause my anger fades away.
The same technique applies to a loss of motivation. Instead of giving into negativity, step back and analyze. Look at the causes. Are you tired, burned out, disappointed by the results? Are these feelings justified, or are they a by product of a low point in the emotional spectrum?
To illustrate these ideas, I’ll use my most recent project as an example, the creation of this site. When I launched Pick the Brain it took an enormous amount of effort. I was completely new to Blogging, web design, and traffic building so there was a steep learning curve. Writing new posts, setting up the site, and trying to build traffic took up nearly all my free time. After about three weeks I was completely burned out. I got depressed and started to question if the site was worth the effort. I wasn’t seeing any returns and I started to find enormous faults in my writing and the purpose of the site. There were moments when I was resigned to failure.
One reason I was able to overcome this loss of motivation is that I prepared myself for a letdown. Beforehand, I researched Blogging and learned that it generally takes 9-12 months before a site begins to see significant traffic. Knowing that my lack of success was perfectly normal helped me get over it. The same is true for other endeavors. If you know losing 20 pounds in a month is unrealistic, you’ll be able to accept losing only 5 more easily.
I also knew my own emotions and was prepared for the initial emotional peak to pass. When I was first inspired to launch a website, my expectations were through the roof. Dreams of Ad Sense revenue danced in my head and I pictured throngs of loyal readers as if they already existed. But because I understand my emotional pattern, I realized this optimism would give way to depression. In the back of my mind, I foresaw the impending motivational battle, and when it came I was ready.
Reevaluate Your Strategy and Motivation
The passing of the emotional peak is a blessing in disguise because it allows us to reevaluate our plans from a fresh perspective. At first we are blinded by our own optimism. When we lose our motivation we can see gaping holes our in plan. We can both get down on ourselves and give up, or we can use this negative emotion to discover our faults and correct them. After I pulled myself out of the motivational cellar, I went back to all the negatives thoughts I’d had and applied them to improving the site. Having a pessimistic attitude opened my eyes. It made me realistic about my abilities and expectations. Emotional valleys bring us back to reality. Without them we’d be raving lunatics with unlimited self-confidence.
Use a loss of motivation as an opportunity to reconsider what your motivation really is. One reason I lost motivation is that I became too concerned with the financial aspect of Blogging and lost sight of the real reason I started: sharing my passion for self improvement and the pursuit of happiness. When I realigned my motivation with my passion, the lack of results didn’t matter. My motivation returned because I realized connecting with people through my writing is an end in itself. Even if this site never makes I dime, sharing my ideas and experiences to help other people is worth the effort.
In truth, sometimes giving up is the right decision. If you started doing something for the wrong reasons you’ll likely lose your motivation. This is a good thing. It allows us to see what really motivates us. In these cases, the best choice is to move on to a new endeavor. Don’t fight self doubt; use it for your benefit.
Conclusion
Dealing with emotional highs and lows is an experience common to all people. We generally accept our emotions as beyond our control. They are powerful and mysterious and appear quite irrational. But if we contemplate our emotions, if we explore the inner workings of our minds, we find that like all things, emotions obey the law of cause and effect. Armed with this knowledge, we can continue to allow our emotions to dominate our lives, or we can use them to our benefit.
Don’t be surprised by a loss of motivation and don’t be disappointed by it. Understand it as natural effect of the human mind, and utilize this knowledge of self to make your emotions work for you.

Just chill..................agarbandhu

A Fun and Effective Way to Stay Motivated

2009-06-17T20:20:00.000-07:00

A Fun and Effective Way to Stay Motivated

How often do you feel excited, really juiced to get out of bed each and every morning to work on your goal? Do you habitually feel motivated, every single day, to do whatever it takes to make your goal or objective happen?
If you don’t feel excited and motivated, don’t want to get started, don’t itch to get down and put every effort you possess, to do what it takes to make it happen, then the goal that you set yourself may be a weak one.
Or, perhaps on this occasion you hit an obstacle, a complication, and it gradually drained your motivation. It happens, we’re human after all. I don’t think we can be highly motivated every single day of our lives.
In such circumstances, even when you’re faced with an inconvenience or discomfort, such as having to do a particular task, one that you think is a pain, one that you hate doing, find boring, or find difficult, you still need to get it done.
It could be that sales call you’ve been dreading, that person you don’t want to meet, or that sales copy that you have to write. Whatever it may be you see a big wall in front of you with a big red cross over the word ‘motivation’.
Yet you still need to get it done. So what do you do?
I ask you to sit back and remember the times when you raced through a project that you hated so you can leave on time on a Friday night to meet up with your friends, or the time when you made all the ten dreaded phone calls one after the other, with no coffee break in between, so you can tick them off your to do list so you can arrive early at the restaurant to get the best table.
What happened?
You were strongly motivated to get out of work on time or to arrive at the restaurant to book the best table, no matter what. You had a goal in mind. As much as you hated and dreaded the project and phone calls, for you to achieve your goal they had to get done.
You did whatever it took to make them happen. You motivated yourself to get them done. Somehow you found a way to get all the motivation you wanted.
Here are two fun and mighty ways you can bring into play to inject added clout to your motivation level when you are faced with a bothersome task:

1. Have fun along the way. Don’t take everything so seriously. If you view working towards your goal a chore or an unpleasant and laborious task, you will fall short of completing the task, or if you did finish it off, you will have had an awful time getting there.
Your goal then becomes a pain, one that you will not want to achieve. You won’t find it fun anymore and you will lose your motivation. The journey to fulfilment should be pleasurable and entertaining.
For you to keep the momentum going it’s important for you to have fun while working on your goal. There will be some things that you will have to do on the way that you do not like doing. I think it’s fair to say that it’s a given fact. Yet, if these so-called chores have to be done anyway, why not make them fun and enjoy doing them?
Spend some time to come up with ways to make the road to success and fulfilment fun and enjoyable, amusing and exciting.
When I have to do things that I don’t enjoy doing yet realize their true worth and value, I gear myself up. What do I do? I act like a fun-loving child for a few minutes (or more).
I have a scrapbook of my favourite cartoon illustrations in my top drawer. I flick through the pages to lighten up. I look at the cartoons, then the work I have to do, and then back to the cartoons. I switch back and forth until I see the humour in the work that I have to do. In the end, the ‘was’ chore has now become a ‘fun’ task that I do happily with a firm smile on my face.
Effective? You bet!
2. Believe you can! Now you might be thinking, Oh, I can’t do that. I can’t take my scrapbook out and have a whale of a time, giggling and laughing. Who says you can’t? You say!
Change that limiting thought. Sure you can have fun. Sure you can flick through your pages of jokes and have a good laugh.
Steer clear of your self-doubt, or any thoughts that you have designed to stop you from having the attitude of a self-motivated and happy person to achieve what you want.

What’s the worst that can happen? Your boss will tell you off for turning the pages of a joke book? Fine. Take a break and take the scrapbook with you!
You see, having motivation and remaining motivated in the long-term can be achieved. You just have to figure out how to remain motivated, especially when things get in the way.
Now you know a fun way of keeping the momentum going. And by the way, not only will you remain motivated, you will enjoy life more by laughing more.

Just chill.................agarbandhu

Read Old Books to Think Great Thoughts

2009-06-17T20:16:00.001-07:00

Read Old Books to Think Great Thoughts

Today there is more to read than ever. Traditional and social news sites are filled with the latest buzz stories repeated ad nauseam. One is pressed to keep up. Amid the endless competition to make headlines and build traffic there is no enduring value.
When I read exclusively new material for an extended period I lose confidence. Each story seems to blend together into meaningless jargon. I feel empty and depressed. Nothing matters because whatever I learn today will be old news tomorrow. If you are someone searching for meaning in life, I am sure you have felt this way as well.

The old enduring books : The test of time

Whenever this happens, I have learned to turn back to the classics, the old enduring books that have stood the test of time and retain their luster. The common perception of old books is that they are antiquated and useless. Nothing could be farther from the truth. We believe, with our technology, that we have reinvented life. But this is not the case. The gadgets that surround us are minor details, the essence of life remains unchanged. It feels the same to be alive today as it did a thousand years ago. Look into yourself and you will know this is true. We are still lone souls confined to our thoughts, facing the same challenges.
Teaching How to Live

Everything has its particular place. Old books cannot give you the weather forecast or teach you to write a JavaScript. But what they will teach you is how to live. They will teach you what it means to be human. They will give you a firm place to stand against the assault of constant change. The wisdom of the greatest human minds passed down through centuries is our most reliable asset.
I am not alone in this opinion. I leave you with this passage from the immortal Albert Einstein.
Somebody who reads only newspapers and at bests the books of contemporary authors looks to me like an extremely nearsighted person who scorns eyeglasses. He is completely dependent on the prejudices and fashions of his times, since he never gets to see or hear anything else. And what a person thinks on his own without being stimulated by the thoughts and experiences of other people is even in the best case rather paltry and monotonous.
There are only a few enlightened people with a lucid mind and style and with good taste with a century. What has been preserved of their work belongs among the most precious possessions of mankind.
Nothing is more needed than to overcome the modernist’s snobbishness.

Just chill..................agarbandhu

Learn to Understand Your Own Intelligence

2009-06-17T20:12:00.001-07:00

Learn to Understand Your Own Intelligence

Three years ago I listened to a lecture on cognition that changed the way I think about intelligence. This is the crux. There are two types of cognition. The first is normal cognition. This is the ability to retrieve knowledge from memory. When you are asked a question on a test and produce an answer, that’s a display of cognitive ability. The second type of cognition is metacognition; the ability to know whether or not you know.
Have you ever been asked a question that you knew the answer to, but you couldn’t find the right word? This is called the “tip of the tongue” phenomenon and I’m sure we’ve all experienced it. You know that you know the answer, but you fail to produce it. If someone said an answer, you would know instantly if it was correct or not. In these cases metacognition exists without cognition.
In short, cognition is knowing, metacognition is knowing if you know or not. Both can exist together, but many times they don’t.
How Does this Affect Intelligence?
So what importance does this have and how is it relevant to self improvement? The fact that there are two different kinds of cognitive ability means that there are different types of intelligence.
In traditional education, intelligence is measured by cognitive ability. For some people this is works well. They can easily produce everything they know on a test. But for others it doesn’t work out so well. The people that know something cold but can’t find the right words on a test are awarded with poor grades and considered inferior.
But does this inability make them any less intelligent? They know the answer. If the question came up on a task, they could refer to a book or a quick Google search. In reality they’re just as effective as the people that aced the test. They just can’t prove it as easily.
The Importance of knowing what you know
Unless you’re taking a test or playing Jeopardy, metacognition is more important to success than cognition. In real life, when you’re faced with a question the first decision is whether you know the answer or not. With strong metacognitive ability this is easy. If you know the answer, but can’t come up with it, you can always do a bit of research. If you know for sure that you don’t know, then you can start educating yourself. Because you’re aware of your ignorance, you don’t act with foolish confidence. The person who thinks they know something that they really don’t makes the worst decisions.
A person with poor cognitive ability, but great metacognitive ability is actually in great shape. They might do poorly in school, but when faced with a challenge they understand their abilities and take the best course of action. These people might not seem intelligent at first glance, but because they know what they know, they make better decisions and learn the most important things.
Clever but mediocre people
At the opposite end of the spectrum are people with great cognitive ability but poor metacognitive ability. These people are proclaimed geniuses at a young age for acing every test and getting great SAT scores. Unfortunately, they’ve been ruined by poor metacognition; they think they know everything but they really don’t. They are arrogant, fail to learn from mistakes, and don’t understand the nuances of personal relationships; showing disdain for persons with lower cognitive ability.
So who is superior? In a battle of wits the higher cognitive ability prevails, but life is not a single encounter. It is a series of experiments in succession, each building upon the last. Learning requires knowing what you don’t know, and taking steps to learn what you need to. People with poor metacognitive ability never realize that they don’t ‘get it’. They also don’t realize what’s important.
This doesn’t preclude them from material success. But, perhaps that’s a poor measurement of intelligence as well. There are many people who become rich and successful by their cleverness and cognitive ability, but as human beings are quite mediocre. Is the man that makes a million dollars, but is cruel and abusive to his employees and family, really more intelligent than the poor man who lives a modest and loving life? I don’t intend to demonize wealth, only to state that it should not be the measure of virtue.
Use your metacognitive ability
So what do we know and what do we not? And how can we tell the difference? There is so much to know in the world that the most brilliant human minds can grasp only the tiniest fraction. For this reason we should always be in doubt of what we know. The closed mind is oblivious to its surroundings, while the open mind absorbs them. Like a sponge, it soaks up observations, becoming fuller and more robust.
But we can’t live in total doubt. If we did we would never act, paralyzed by our inadequate knowledge. We must trust our intuition. If something makes you feel a certain way, that feeling is real and must be respected. Acts based on your own convictions, not those of others, and keep an open ear for new ideas.
The most important mental power is the ability to know what you don’t know. The recognition of a fault is the first step to improvement. Don’t try to hide a lack of knowledge. People will see through it and you’ll appear foolish and arrogant. If you admit your ignorance, people will help you learn and respect your humility. For intelligent people this is the toughest lesson to learn. We are used to being right, and consider being wrong shameful. We’re afraid to lose status by looking stupid. This vain arrogance is a great weakness and the source of many problems. To crush it and embrace humility is the mark of true wisdom.

Just chill......................agarbandhu

Resisting the Temptation of Authority

2009-06-17T20:07:00.000-07:00

Resisting the Temptation of Authority

For many reasons, submitting to authority is extremely attractive. It takes the pressure off. We don’t have to think for ourselves. If any problems arise we don’t have to worry about deciding what to do. We can just do what the leader says and be confident that answer is the final truth.

This innate craving for authority is rooted deeply in the human psyche. In Freud’s philosophy, the mind is divided into three segments. The id is our primitive childish side. It causes our spontaneous desires for sex, food, and laziness. When you get an urge to quit working, take a nap, eat junk food, or look at pictures of scantily clad members of the opposite sex, that’s the id at work. The superego is the opposite of the id. When you feel compelled by success and ambition, the superego is exerting its influence. The ego is the moderator between the id and superego. It tries to balance the two and is perpetually torn between extremes. Authority forms a bridge between the superego and the id, allowing the ego take a vacation. When you submit to authority, the superego is happy because it believes you are doing the right thing, the id is happy because your childish craving for a father is satisfied, and the ego is thrilled because for once there is peace.
Authority is not constrained to a single personage. It takes the form of belief systems, religious doctrines, political parties, and any entity claiming to hold truth exclusive to all the rest. These entities appear to have our best interests at heart. They take us under their wing and shelter us from the world.
In our heart of hearts, we’re all searching for a great teacher, someone who has mastered life and will show us the way. Isn’t it invigorating to discover a potential authority? Whenever I find a new author that strikes a chord I can’t get enough. I read everything they have to offer, hoping to find that elusive truth. But inevitably, my naive enthusiasm wears off and I realize the answer isn’t there.
From childhood we are conditioned to submit to authority. Do what the teacher says or you will be punished. The desire for authority continues in adulthood and there is never a shortage of potential leaders urging us to join them. Consider the books and web pages you read. How many claim to improve your lives, if only you subscribe, tell your friends, and follow their instructions? Understand that all motivation is rooted in self interest, and be guarded against those who offer simple answers.
There is No One Right Way
I’m not saying that everything offering guidance is evil. There is much to be learned from authority. But it is harmful when accepted unconditionally. There is no ONE right way. The are many shades of truth and ways to live. Growth, intelligence, and perspective are developed by experiencing a broad variety and drawing your own conclusions. By submitting to authority you sacrifice originality and potential for personal growth.
Nothing Will Solve All Your Problems
Many people are of the opinion that if one party took over the government, or if some ideal system was implemented, our problems would be solved. Our problems are not so simple. The root cause is human weakness; greed, selfishness, aggression, and jealousy. There is no system of government that can change human nature. The conflict would remain and people would turn to another ‘answer’.
We see the same weakness exploited at a personal level. Supposed gurus preach miraculous programs. For a price, you can be cured. We are so desperate for authority we flock to these frauds, and in a desperate search for answers oversimplify our problems. Suppose the guru is correct and you make a million dollars, or fulfill some other dream, what then? Authority will give you no lasting peace.
Authority Exploits
When we submit to authority, we willingly pull the wool over our own eyes, exposing ourselves to manipulation. The greatest catastrophes of human history were caused by submission to authority. The Holocaust was caused by submission to the Nazi authority. September 11th was caused by submission to Bin Laden’s authority. Everyday people are suckered out of hard earned money because they blindly believe in authority. Be distrustful, question what you’re told, and don’t believe that anyone claiming to have all the answers has your best interests at heart.It is a cold and lonely road to stand alone without authority and rely on your own judgment. But as Emerson said, “To be a man, is to be a nonconformist.” I hope you will choose to trust your own intuition above any outside authority. Be honest with yourself, live by your own principals, and you people will admire you for it. But don’t take my word for it, reflect and draw your own conclusions.

Just chill........................agarbandhu

Overcoming a Loss of Motivation

2009-06-17T03:30:00.000-07:00

Overcoming a Loss of Motivation

How many times have you started a new activity (such as a personal project or exercise routine) with a burst of enthusiasm, only to see that initial momentum evaporate? This often leads to depression and causes us to give up prematurely. I’ve experienced this letdown dozens of times myself. But fortunately, with a bit of thought and reflection you can turn this negative emotion around.
The key to harnessing your emotions is understanding them. The natural pattern of human emotion is peaks and valleys. When we start a new project we’re filled with tremendous optimism. All we can think about is the expected benefits, and since we haven’t started yet, we aren’t aware of the difficulties involved. This natural high causes a surge of mental and physical activity. The peak is a great thing because the energy boost gets projects off the ground. If you’re a creative type like me, you know that this period is euphoric. You feel like nothing can stop you.
The downside of this surge of energy is that it inevitably ends. Exerting large amounts of energy wears you down, and after the initial optimism wears off we feel extremely tired. However high you started off, you fall down just as low. This causes a loss of confidence. The combination of fatigue, scant results, and an awareness of impending adversity makes us want to give up. From personal experience I’ve learned a few ways to hold strong against negativity.
Be Prepared for a Letdown
Emotions, by nature, lose their power when we understand them. Prove this to yourself. Next time you get angry; take a moment to reflect on the reason behind the emotion. When I step back and reflect, it’s easy to see that my anger is caused by insecurity/selfishness/jealousy etc. After I understand the cause my anger fades away.
The same technique applies to a loss of motivation. Instead of giving into negativity, step back and analyze. Look at the causes. Are you tired, burned out, disappointed by the results? Are these feelings justified, or are they a by product of a low point in the emotional spectrum?
To illustrate these ideas, I’ll use my most recent project as an example, the creation of this site. When I launched Pick the Brain it took an enormous amount of effort. I was completely new to Blogging, web design, and traffic building so there was a steep learning curve. Writing new posts, setting up the site, and trying to build traffic took up nearly all my free time. After about three weeks I was completely burned out. I got depressed and started to question if the site was worth the effort. I wasn’t seeing any returns and I started to find enormous faults in my writing and the purpose of the site. There were moments when I was resigned to failure.
One reason I was able to overcome this loss of motivation is that I prepared myself for a letdown. Beforehand, I researched Blogging and learned that it generally takes 9-12 months before a site begins to see significant traffic. Knowing that my lack of success was perfectly normal helped me get over it. The same is true for other endeavors. If you know losing 20 pounds in a month is unrealistic, you’ll be able to accept losing only 5 more easily.
I also knew my own emotions and was prepared for the initial emotional peak to pass. When I was first inspired to launch a website, my expectations were through the roof. Dreams of Ad Sense revenue danced in my head and I pictured throngs of loyal readers as if they already existed. But because I understand my emotional pattern, I realized this optimism would give way to depression. In the back of my mind, I foresaw the impending motivational battle, and when it came I was ready.
Reevaluate Your Strategy and Motivation
The passing of the emotional peak is a blessing in disguise because it allows us to reevaluate our plans from a fresh perspective. At first we are blinded by our own optimism. When we lose our motivation we can see gaping holes our in plan. We can both get down on ourselves and give up, or we can use this negative emotion to discover our faults and correct them. After I pulled myself out of the motivational cellar, I went back to all the negatives thoughts I’d had and applied them to improving the site. Having a pessimistic attitude opened my eyes. It made me realistic about my abilities and expectations. Emotional valleys bring us back to reality. Without them we’d be raving lunatics with unlimited self-confidence.
Use a loss of motivation as an opportunity to reconsider what your motivation really is. One reason I lost motivation is that I became too concerned with the financial aspect of Blogging and lost sight of the real reason I started: sharing my passion for self improvement and the pursuit of happiness. When I realigned my motivation with my passion, the lack of results didn’t matter. My motivation returned because I realized connecting with people through my writing is an end in itself. Even if this site never makes I dime, sharing my ideas and experiences to help other people is worth the effort.
In truth, sometimes giving up is the right decision. If you started doing something for the wrong reasons you’ll likely lose your motivation. This is a good thing. It allows us to see what really motivates us. In these cases, the best choice is to move on to a new endeavor. Don’t fight self doubt; use it for your benefit.
Conclusion
Dealing with emotional highs and lows is an experience common to all people. We generally accept our emotions as beyond our control. They are powerful and mysterious and appear quite irrational. But if we contemplate our emotions, if we explore the inner workings of our minds, we find that like all things, emotions obey the law of cause and effect. Armed with this knowledge, we can continue to allow our emotions to dominate our lives, or we can use them to our benefit.
Don’t be surprised by a loss of motivation and don’t be disappointed by it. Understand it as natural effect of the human mind, and utilize this knowledge of self to make your emotions work for you.

Just chill..............agarbandhu

Why are we afraid of the Truth?

2009-06-17T03:25:00.000-07:00

Why are we afraid of the Truth?

I read a post today titled Why Kids Do Drugs. The point of the article is contained in this passage:
Kids do drugs because they realize that adults have lied to them about it. If they are to discover the truth, they have only one course of action: Do drugs.
Yesterday I heard a story on NPR in which children were asked what they thought about drugs. Each child parroted back, with conviction, all the same false information I believed at their age. They said things like “you’ll die” and “you’ll lose all your friends.”
What will these kids do when they find out it’s not true? Drugs. When it is discovered first-hand that drugs aren’t so bad what, then, what will these kids do? More drugs.
Of all the things kids are told about drugs, the truth is blatantly omitted. Why? Because people are afraid to publicly say anything about drugs that isn’t 100% negative. They’re afraid of having their words twisted and their reputations ruined. And these fears are justified because society is terrified of the truth.
Why are we afraid of the truth? When did it become unmentionable?
Wouldn’t telling kids why drugs are harmful and why people use them preempt loads of rebellion and costly lessons? Wouldn’t satisfying their curiosity in a positive way prevent them from satisfying it negatively? Instead of making them learn through trial and error, why don’t we tell them what they’re going to learn?
This web of lies doesn’t stop kids from doing drugs. It scares them and fills their minds with nonsense. When they finally learn the truth they also learn to distrust those who’ve lied to them. Namely, their parents, teachers, and authority in general.
The issue of drug education is just one example of socially endorsed and propagated lies. We spend our early adult lives unlearning the lies we’ve been fed about sex, money, history, religion, and life in general.
Want a good job? Better put on your lying pants (or at least your partial truth pants) because the last thing you should use during an interview are candid, spontaneous answers. You’d be smart to memorize answers to common questions beforehand, especially anecdotes about your leadership abilities and group work skills. Total honesty is a liability; it shows a lack of preparation.
Consider mass media. It’s primarily fantasy; elaborate lies that lead kids to believe in a false reality, interspersed with advertisements telling them they need various products to cover their inadequacy.
This reminds me of a quote from Fight Club that rings eerily true for members of this generation.
We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off.
You have to wonder how we got where we are. Has lying always been so prevalent? Is it ingrained in the human mind? Are we really better off denying the truth?
To be serious, lying isn’t always malicious. There are many scenarios where lying is permissible, even desirable. It’s occasionally necessary for the sake of decency; a free market can’t operate unless some form of deception is permitted; and many people are happy being lied to, especially if the lie is pleasurable.
Lies can’t be completely avoided. The problem is lies that form the “official truth”, lies that everyone goes along with. The truth shouldn’t be forced on people, but it should be available to people who need it.
We’ve reached the point of lie saturation and society is beginning to re-balance itself. The fact you’re reading this article is evidence. Blogs offer something big media can’t: they have a monopoly on truth. The individual writer isn’t bound by the bureaucracy, financial, and legal obligations of a large organization. With minimal expense, one person can tell the truth and anyone with a computer can hear it.
And people are dying to hear it. They’re craving it. They’ve been denied the truth their entire lives and now they’re searching for it. They’re just waiting for someone brave enough to say it.

Just chill......................agarbandhu

7 Ways to Grow the Action Habit

2009-06-16T22:47:00.000-07:00

7 Ways to Grow the Action Habit
People at the top of every profession share one quality — they get things done. This ability supersedes intelligence, talent, and connections in determining the size of your salary and the speed of your advancement.

Despite the simplicity of this concept there is a perpetual shortage of people who excel at getting results. The action habit — the habit of putting ideas into action now — is essential to getting things done.

Here are 7 ways you can grow the action

habit:1. Don’t wait until conditions are perfect - If you’re waiting to start until conditions are perfect, you probably never will. There will always be something that isn’t quite right. Either the timing is off, the market is down, or there’s too much competition. In the real world there is no perfect time to start. You have to take action and deal with problems as they arise. The best time to start was last year. The second best time is right now.
2. Be a doer - Practice doing things rather than thinking about them. Do you want to start exercising? Do you have a great idea to pitch your boss? Do it today. The longer an idea sits in your head without being acted on, the weaker it becomes. After a few days the details gets hazy. After a week it’s forgotten completely. By becoming a doer you’ll get more done and stimulate new ideas in the process.

3. Remember that ideas alone don’t bring success - Ideas are important, but they’re only valuable after they’ve been implemented. One average idea that’s been put into action is more valuable than a dozen brilliant ideas that you’re saving for “some other day” or the “right opportunity”. If you have an idea the you really believe in, do something about it. Unless you take action it will never go anywhere.

4. Use action to cure fear - Have you ever noticed that the most difficult part of public speaking is waiting for your turn to speak? Even professional speakers and actors experience pre-performance anxiety. Once they get started the fear disappears. Action is the best cure for fear. The most difficult time to take action is the very first time. After the ball is rolling, you’ll build confidence and things will keep getting easier. Kill fear by taking action and build on that confidence.
5. Start your creative engine mechanically - One of the biggest misconceptions about creative work is that it can only be done when inspiration strikes. If you wait for inspiration to slap you in the face, your work sessions will be few and far between. Instead of waiting, start your creative motor mechanically. If you need to write something, force yourself to sit down and write. Put pen to paper. Brainstorm. Doodle. By moving your hands you’ll stimulate the flow of ideas and inspire yourself.

6. Live in the present - Focus on what you can do in the present moment. Don’t worry about what you should have done last week or what you might be able to do tomorrow. The only time you can affect is the present. If you speculate too much about the past or the future you won’t get anything done. Tomorrow or next week frequently turns into never.
7. Get down to business immediately - It’s common practice for people to socialize and make small talk at the beginning of meetings. The same is true for individual workers. How often do you check email or RSS feeds before doing any real work? These distractions will cost you serious time if you don’t bypass them and get down to business immediately.

By becoming someone who gets to the point you’ll be more productive and people will look to you as a leader.
It takes courage to take action without instructions from the person in charge. Perhaps that’s why initiative is a rare quality that’s coveted by managers and executives everywhere. Seize the initiative. When you have a good idea, start implementing it without being told.

Once people see you’re serious about getting things done they’ll want to join in. The people at the top don’t have anyone telling them what to do. If you want to join them, you should get used to acting independently.

Just chill.............................agarbandhu

Einstein’s Theory of Religion

2009-06-16T22:43:00.000-07:00

Einstein’s Theory of Religion

“Everything that the human race has done and thought is concerned with the satisfaction of deeply felt needs and the assuagement of pain.”-Einstein

A great mind is not constrained by specialization. Albert Einstein’s genius illuminated religion, politics, and education as well as science. When I came across Einstein’s theory of religion several months ago it immediately changed the way I think. Einstein begins with a discussion of the nature and origin of religion.
With primitive man it is above all fear that evokes religious notions- fear of hunger, wild beasts, sickness, death. Since at this stage of existence understanding of causal connections is usually poorly developed, the human mind creates illusory beings more or less analogous to itself on whose wills and actions these fearful happenings depend.
Einstein also explains why early fear based religions evolved into the moral religions of modern times.
The social impulses are another source of the crystallization of religion. Fathers and mothers and the leaders of larger human communities are mortal and fallible. The desire for guidance, love, and support prompts men to form the moral conception of God. This is the God of Providence, who protects, rewards, disposes, and punishes; the God who, according to the limits of the believer’s outlook, loves and cherishes the life of the tribe or of the human race, or even life itself; the comforter in sorrow and unsatisfied longing. He who preserves the souls of the dead. This is the social or moral conception of God.
Einstein goes on to explain how the development from the religion of fear to the moral religion begins in the Old Testament and continues in the New Testament. To this day, religion is a mix of fear and morality, with the moral religion predominating in civilized societies.
The crux of Einstein’s theory is the next idea. When I read it I realized that it put into words a feeling I had never been able to express.
Common to all these types is the anthropomorphic character of their conception of God. In general, only individuals of exceptional endowments, and exceptionally high-minded communities, rise to any considerable extent above this level. But there is a third stage of religious experience which belongs to all of them, even though it is rarely found in a pure form: I shall call it cosmic religious feeling. It is very difficult to elucidate this feeling to anyone who is entirely without it, especially as there is no anthropomorphic conception of God corresponding to it.
The individual feels the futility of human desires and aims and the sublimity of marvelous order which reveal themselves both in nature and in the world on thought. Individual existence impress him as a sort of prison and he wants to experience the universe as a single significant whole. The religious geniuses of all ages have been distinguished by this kind of religious feeling, which knows no dogma and no God conceived in man’s image; so that there can be no church.
It is the most important function of art and science to awaken this feeling and keep it alive in those who are receptive to it.The cosmic religious feeling is the strongest and noblest reason for scientific research.Einstein’s theory confirmed what I have always believed: that there is a form of religion independent from any church or belief system. We don’t have to choose between believing that God is a white-haired man in the sky and not believing in God at all. The cosmic religious feeling is the highest level of human perception. It moves beyond the purely human constructs of fear and morality and attempts to conceive the universe as a perfectly unified whole. The cosmic religious feeling is rare and mysterious, but it is real. It is important that all who are receptive to it develop the feeling in themselves and share the idea with others

Just chill.......................agarbandhu

Improve Your Personal Effectiveness by Finding Balance

2009-06-16T22:41:00.001-07:00

Improve Your Personal Effectiveness by Finding Balance

Could you believe that the ideal person is never the best at anything? Our heads are so full of delusions about wealth and power that we run ourselves ragged trying to out do each other. We spin our wheels until we burn ourselves out and are left hopeless and exhausted.
There is great pressure to attain the highest level of achievement. We want to be the richest, most beautiful, and most well-liked because these virtues are glorified. But by indulging our vanity we do ourselves more harm than good. The only way to achieve sustainable happiness is to practice the Golden Mean.
The idea of the Golden Mean has existed for thousands of years. It is at the core of both Eastern and Western philosophy and is central to the teachings of Aristotle and Confucius. The idea is simple. Every quality has extremes at both ends. The Golden Mean is the natural balance between these extremes. At this harmonious point goodness and beauty are achieved.
Socrates used the example of extreme devotion to athletics versus extreme devotion to music to illustrate this idea. The athlete becomes overly aggressive and ferocious, while the musician becomes overly soft and effeminate. The ideal is someone who practices both athletics and music in moderation and acquires a harmonious mixture of both qualities.
Consider an example from modern times that I’m sure everyone has observed. The first person is extremely career driven. Each day he focuses on advancing himself. He spends long hours at the office, competes mercilessly with his coworkers, and flatters his superiors. As a result he has almost no personal life. The second person’s only pursuit is leisure. He likes to waste time with his friends watching television and playing video games.
Which of these persons is superior? Many people would argue for the hard worker. But at second glance his life is rather cold. His obsession with success has alienated his coworkers and left him without a family. He may become rich, but how will he enjoy it? The second man is no better. He has wasted his life in laziness. He has refused to develop himself and exists as a parasitic leech. Both men are worthy of pity.
I think we’d all agree the ideal would be somewhere in between these two people. So how do we find the elusive Golden Mean? The bad news: it takes years of trial and error get it perfect, but fortunately, we can all improve if we try.
It all starts with setting the right goals. Whenever you make a goal you need to do it with the right intention. Don’t set goals with the intent to dominate other people. This type of goal setting is ego driven and pulls you away from the mean. Instead, try to start with a goal that is in between total selfishness and total selflessness. If you are helping yourself and other people at the same time you can draw motivation from your ego driven side and from the part of you that wants to work for the common good. This type of goal setting is effective because whenever you start to lose motivation in one area you can draw from the other.
The next step to reaching the Golden Mean is knowing your limits. You need to know when that next drink is going to put you over the edge or when one more project is going to stress you out. The idea is to maintain balance at all times. You need to police yourself to avoid extremity. If you know when you are inclined to stray you have a head start on achieving balance.
Another step to achieving the Golden Mean is being aware of your personal needs. Sure we need money and success, but having good relationships with friends and family are just as important. Whenever you find yourself unhappy, take a moment to reflect on the reason. You will likely find that you have drifted over to one extreme and are feeling the consequences.
I know the Golden Mean is hard to live by, but it is the key to finding your inner confidence. Ben Franklin said, “The wise learn from the mistakes of others, fools, scarcely from their own.” Next time you find yourself willing to do anything to be the best of the best, take a moment to reconsider. You may find it is better to be the best “you” you can be.

Just chill.............................agarbandhu

7 Rules for a Life worth Living

2009-06-16T22:29:00.000-07:00

7 Rules for a Life worth Living

Are you writing the story of your life, or are you letting other people and circumstances write it for you? You might not consider yourself a follower, but here are a few signs you aren’t in control:
You don’t like your job - Maybe you picked something because it was easier or safer than your ideal career. Worse, maybe you’re just doing what your family pressured you to do.

You’re living paycheck to paycheck - The problem usually isn’t money, but your priorities. It isn’t hard for the stuff you own to turn around and own you.

You feel obligated to do things you don’t want to do. Your first duty is to yourself. You can’t save the world while you’re miserable.

Leading your life isn’t easy. It means freeing yourself from many different assumptions. That freedom can be initially terrifying and painful, which is why so few people do it. It is far easier to just follow the assumptions of society, even if it leaves you unfulfilled.
Here are 7 rules that can help you start building a life worth living:
Rule One: Never let another person dictate the terms for living your life.
Not your parents. Not your spouse. Not your kids. Leading your life means you can accept the input of other people, but the final decision is yours. This means that career choice, relationships, beliefs and way of life are to be judged by you, not anyone else.
This rule holds especially when you have doubts. Don’t let your moment of doubt become a weakness to be exploited by others. Not sure what you want to do with your life? Don’t sit passively and let other people decide for you.
Rule Two: Don’t allow yourself to be chained by consumerism.
The world is filled with stuff. Don’t let stuff get in the way of what is important. When you become chained to your stuff, you are no longer leading your life. Ask yourself: if you had to give up 90% of your net worth tomorrow to pursue your dream, could you do it effortlessly? If you hesitated, perhaps your ability to lead your own life has been weakened by your attachment to stuff.
Rule Three: Rule money. Don’t let money rule you.
Money is a resource that can be applied when leading your life. You can use it to reduce discomforts, focus on meaningful work and apply it to help you learn and improve. But if you’re living paycheck to paycheck, the money is in control.
Here are some goals to put yourself in a position to rule the money in your life:
Maintain one year of emergency funds in the bank.
Your lifestyle should expand at a slower rate than your income grows.
Be able to drastically reduce your expenditures if needed.
Financial freedom doesn’t mean the ability to buy everything you could desire or live in luxury. It means that money becomes a tool and not a distraction in leading your life.
Rule Four: You come first in relationships.
Do you know people that can’t stand being single? They get out of one bad relationship only to jump into the next.
Why? Because they put too much of their needs dependent on that other person. Without emotional and possibly financial support, they can’t survive.
In any relationship you need to be the person that comes first. That means that while you might enjoy the relationship, it doesn’t become the major purpose in your life.
Your purpose and leading your life must come before any relationship you enter. The surprising fact is that when you do this, you are able to have healthier personal and intimate relationships because there is no need for jealousy or possession.
Rule Five: Never outsource your thinking.
“You can split up food between men, but each man must digest it individually.” - Howard Roark in The Fountainhead.
Leading your own life means leading your own beliefs. It means never accepting anything unless you can filter it through your reasoning and find it to be true. Think critically about everything in life. Chances are there are a lot of indigested thoughts floating around trying to bypass your mind and go straight to your gut.
Rule Six: Anything you lack can be trained.
Never accept a fatalistic view of life. So you’ve been told you lack the intelligence, willpower, strength or charisma to do something? Ignore them. So you’ve told yourself that you lack the talent? Ignore yourself.
Begin with the assumption that anything can be trained and you’ll find few exceptions. I used to be a shy, introverted kid. Recently some friends described me as an extreme extrovert, being unafraid to meet new people and having honed my abilities to speak in front of crowds. Begin with the belief that you have no idea where your talents are until you train them.
Rule Seven: Purpose comes from your creative faculties.
Want to know what your purpose in life is? Simple. Hold your hands in front of you. Now look at them. There is your purpose and means to do it.
Purpose is your ability to take the creative energies you have and communicating them with the world. You and I might pick different mediums, but the act of purpose is exactly the same. You could be a manager crafting the art of dealing with people, a programmer crafting the knowledge of algorithms or an entrepreneur crafting the art of a business.

Don’t worry if you haven’t found the right medium. Once you feel that great purpose for your life and it comes from within, that is your greatest asset. With that belief you are the leader of your own life.

Just chill..............................agarbandhu

I simply love red roses

2009-06-11T01:57:00.000-07:00

THE WORLD OF ROSES

"I simply Love RED-ROSES"

just chill..........................................anil

Happiness is a voyage, not a destination

2009-06-10T23:17:00.001-07:00

Happiness is a voyage, not a destination
There is no better time to be happy than… NOW!
Live and enjoy the moment.
-Author unknown

We convince ourselves that life will be better once we are married, have a baby, then another. Then we get frustrated because our children are not old enough and that all will be well when they are older. Then we are frustrated because they reach adolescence and we must deal with them. Surely we’ll be happier when they grow out of the teen years. We tell ourselves our life will be better when our spouse gets his/her act together, when we have a nicer car, when we can take a vacation, when we finally retire.
The truth is that there is no better time to be happy than right now. If not, then when?
Your life will always be full of challenges. It is better to admit as much and to decide to be happy in spite of it all. For the longest time, it seemed that life was about to start; Real life. But there was always some obstacle along the way, an ordeal to get through, some work to be finished, some time to be given, and a bill to be paid. Then life would start.
I finally came to understand that those obstacles were life. That point of view helped me see that there isn’t any road to happiness. Happiness IS the road. We keep waiting for the so called destination of happiness and success and in the bargain forget to enjoy thousands of small events of happiness and success.
Instead of waiting for the elusive destination of happiness and success, create small milestones in everyday life and enjoy every moment.
Stop waiting for school to end, for a return to school, to lose ten kilos, to gain ten kilos, for work to begin, to find your ideal love, to get married, for maid to come, for Saturday evening, for Sunday morning, waiting for a new car, for your home loan to be paid off, for spring, for summer, for autumn, for winter, for the first or the fifteenth of the month, for your song to be played on the radio, to die, to be reborn… before deciding to be happy.

Now, think and try to answer these questions:
1 – Name the 5 richest people in the world.
2 – Name the last 5 Miss Universe winners.
3 – Name the last 10 Nobel Prize winners.
4 – Name the last 10 winners of the Best Actor Oscar.

Can’t do it? Rather difficult, isn’t it? Don’t worry, nobody remembers that.
Applause dies away! Trophies gather dust! Winners are soon forgotten.

Now answer these questions:
1 – Name 3 teachers who contributed to your education.
2 – Name 3 friends who helped you in your hour of need.
3 – Think of a few people who made you feel special.
4 – Name 5 people that you like to spend time with.

More manageable? It’s easier, isn’t it?
The people who mean something to our life are not rated “the best”, don’t have the most money, haven’t won the greatest prizes…They are the ones who care about you, take care of you, those who, no matter what, stay close by. Think about it for a moment. Life is very short! And you, in which list are you? Don’t know?

Let me give you a hand. You are not among the most “famous”, but are you among those who are always loved, remembered and missed by your near and dear ones and your friends?

Some times ago, at the Seattle Olympics, nine athletes, all mentally or physically challenged, were standing on the start line for the 100 m race. The gun fired and the race began. Not everyone was running, but everyone wanted to participate and win. They ran in threes, a boy tripped and fell, did a few somersaults and started crying. The other eight heard him crying. They slowed down and looked behind them. They stopped and all of them came back. A girl with Down’s syndrome sat down next to him, hugged him and asked, “Feeling better now?” Then, all nine walked shoulder to shoulder to the finish line. The whole crowd stood up and applauded. And the applause lasted a very long time. People who witnessed this still talk about it. Why? Because deep down inside us, we all know that the most important thing in life is much more than winning for ourselves. This is called building your happiness and success around others’ happiness and success.

The most important thing in this life is to help others to win, even if that means slowing down and changing our own race because happiness is a voyage and not a destination.A candle loses nothing if it is used to light another one.

Just chill.........!!

anil

Romance at workplace

2009-06-10T23:08:00.000-07:00

Romance at workplace

All over the world, workplace romance is becoming a common phenomenon. I conducted a survey to understand how romance occurs at the serious, professional environment of an office

Ever heard of the phrase “Familiarity breeds contempt!” Well, that’s quite an outdated opinion in the corporate world today. Workplace romance is on an ever increase today than ever before. The workplace being a professional environment should be the last place for romance to develop and flourish, but just the contrary is true. With long hours spent at work, it is not unusual for colleagues to develop an intimate relationship and chemistry. Many couples have met at the workplace and are happily settled, but that ratio remains as low as 5% out of the relationships that spring up at work.

To understand why people are victims of the workplace romance syndrome, we must temporarily suspend our judgment of what is right or wrong, and let’s look at the whole picture a little objectively. At most work places you have the best choices in terms of talent and ability and these two when combined with good looks makes a lethal weapon of attraction.

How does the work place romance occur?

1. Togetherness at work: People are together for more than 8 hours and sometimes 12 hours everyday. Over a period of time, with this kind of time spent in the company of the same people, a familiarity or attraction develops. This is more visible in the younger generation today especially if the couples in question are working on the same project or department. With life becoming more and more work centric people find themselves closer to selective colleagues than even friends outside of work, let alone family and spouses.

2. Exotic Company off sites: And the biggest culprit which allows for this unsaid, unacknowledged romance to blossom is the exotic company off sites. This is the time to party and use alcohol as an excuse to let ones emotions and feelings lose. Ever so often people have returned from off sites with blossoming relationships. The setting is just so perfect. Five star property, private silver beach, club suite, ravishing party. How much more romantic than that can you get? Some off sites are more glorious than the honey moon some people ever had.

3. Losing rapport with family and friends: With a seven day week and long working hours, when one gets home, there is little or nothing to say. Usually after the late hours, building and nurturing a relationship is physically not possible and with both partners working, the distance between them easily catches momentum. So the attraction towards people at work is much understood.

Just chill...................!!

anil

What is Blogging?

2009-06-10T23:04:00.000-07:00

What is Blogging?

The word blog is a shortened version of the term web log. When one writes a blog and maintains it by adding or removing entries that is called blogging. With blogging the author is not simply called an author but a blogger. And each piece that is written is not simply known as an article but as a blog post, post, or entry. Blogging started in 1995 and started with the express purpose of sharing one's thoughts with people that had similar views.
Blogs can be written on just about any topic and are often like an online diary that allows the blogger to express his or her personal interests and views on everything and anything. Most people blog on a blog site that includes web pages, text, images, and even links to other blogs. While blogging started out as a somewhat limited media, now it has really exploded and you can find a blog on just about any topic you can think of. Blogging has really taken off because it allows authors to write in a fashion that is sort of outside the box. Blogs started out as a limited source of information, but they have become a great way to communicate, and get information on business, education, politics, photos, and your favorite celebrities.
Surprisingly, many people have found interesting ways to make money with their blogs. Adding Google ads is a great way to make some money while having ads on your blog that are relevant to the topic at hand. The way this works is that Google will place an ad or link on the pages of the blog, if a reader clicks on the ad, the blogger gets paid a set amount for each ad. While one click may not make one a millionaire, if the blogger consistently provides great material on his or her blog, visitors will continue to read and even click, earning the blogger some easy money.
Luckily, setting up a blog doesn't have to be difficult. There are a ton of free blogging websites out there that simply offer templates that allow the blogger to enter his or her text and hit the submit button. The hardest part of this process is deciding what category your blog will fall under, and then providing interesting text each and every time you post. Belonging to such a website will make posting easy, will make archiving simple, and will make it very simple for interested parties to return again and again. These websites also make it simple for interested parties to start discussions about the blog text, which can drum up even more interest. Bloggers can use their own software to establish their blog on their own, or they can look into Tripod, Yahoo , Google or America Online which all offer blogging opportunities.
There is no doubt that blogging has come a long way in the last 11 years. Blogging is now a great outlet for anyone out there that wishes to share his or her thoughts on any topic through a personal or even professional blog. Money can be made through blogging, but generally blogging can just be a great outlet and a way to meet people that share your opinions.

Just chill…………….!!
anil

LAUNCHING MY WEBLOG

2009-06-10T22:42:00.000-07:00

LAUNCHING MY WEBLOG

http://professoranilaggarwal.blogspot.com/

Hey Darren,

This is great! I’m excited about the prospect of starting my own weblog today, maybe several. I have some passions in life and see blogging as a way of “living out loud”.
Appreciate your efforts . . . and I will be back.

Just chill.........

anil